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Schizophrenic or Psychic?


J__ki

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First off, I want to point out that I'm very new to this site. And feel the urge to ask people such as yourselves whether I'm mentally ill or have a direct connection with the paranormal.

I was diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder ((mental illness that consists of major depression and psychosis)) around 3 years ago. But the majority of my "hallucinations" are......demonic, ghostly.

To start this off, I was extremely curious and STUPID in high school. My friends and I would always go to graveyards very late at night and literally harass spirits to communicate with us--I was the one who always tried to p*** them off / rial them up to get a reaction...and unfortunately, it worked. My friends and I have seen them, heard them. We even developed the "tapping game", where I would ask the spirits VERY personal questions, tap on my history book and wait for their yes or no response ((1 tap was a no, 2 was a yes)). Looking back on this, I am ashamed of myself for upsetting these spirits. Because now I'm "clinically insane".

The "delusions" I have involve Elizabeth, a spirit I used to talk to in high school. She used to live in my parents house but now seems to follow me wherever I go. She has multiple personality disorder and has lived a very frightening life. How I know this? My close friend and I played the "tapping game" with her 7 years ago. And she literally possessed my friend for a few minutes. She told me ((through my friend)) that her father used to beat her and rape her and eventually drowned her in my parents bath tub on the top floor of the house. The kitchen ceiling still leaks--even though my parents have tried many times to repair the plumbing and have even REMOVED the tub.

I hear Elizabeth talk in my head constantly and she hates me. She thinks that I am stupid and worthless and pathetic. It gets worse, though. Back 6 years ago when I was 16, 17 years old...when I finally decided to stop irritating and manipulating the paranormal...the paranormal started to bother me. I saw dark fogs, the hat man, and what I believe to be now a succubus. The succubus literally STILL enters my dreams. The dreams consist of a woman raveled in white cloth with wide eyes sucking me dry in my bed, me trying to scream for help / trying to wake up but I can't breath. My boyfriend has told me that every night I literally convulse in my sleep and stop breathing.

I've seen demons. Many of them are dark shadows scurrying around the floors, walls, and ceiling laughing at me and mocking me.

These are my "hallucinations".

Please be honest. Am I sick or is this a spiritual battle?

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Before you question whether it's a spiritual battle, perhaps you should have a psych evaluation. Demons are few and far between so I doubt that it's demon activity but it's possible. You sound coherent but so do people with schizophrenia, at times anyway... Rule that out and go to the doctor to make sure you don't have a medical condition or schizophrenia. Then go from there.

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What your seeing could be a hallucination but I have seen a ghost so I know there is a spirit world. I think I would start out with a doctor because there are medical conditions that can cause you to hallucinate. As far as the problems when asleep that could be sleep paralysis.

Welcome to the forum.

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Are you currently on any type of medication? You said you were diagnosed 3 years ago. Was this by a qualified individual? And are you currently undergoing any type of counseling or psychiatric care?

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My sciatica has been acting up lately and as a result haven't been getting much sleep (I can't lie down). This has been accompanied by a significant increase in auditory hallucinations where I hear relatives, both alive and dead, pronouncing my name loud enough to startle me, and now sometimes saying other things, usually of an unflattering nature. Straightening out the cause and effects here with the pain pills and the lack of sleep and the acupuncture as well as deciding which stimuli are real and which are hallucinatory is I think almost impossible. I was given one pretty clear instruction to use a certain pillow on a certain chair to good benefit, so whether this was my subconscious finding me a way to give me a message or something else, it was appreciated.

Edited by Frank Merton
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Are you currently on any type of medication? You said you were diagnosed 3 years ago. Was this by a qualified individual? And are you currently undergoing any type of counseling or psychiatric care?

Yes. I've been diagnosed schizoaffective by 3 psychiatric doctors now. And I am on medication. But I can still see spirits and feel them??? Maybe it is illness it's just strange that a lot of the things I've seen / heard, many others have stated saying they've seen / heard similar things. I'm really worried I'm suffering from demonic oppression because I literally forget days.

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I wonder if that could be the medication.

I know if I take melatonin I can have the craziest vivid dreams.

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Sadly I would have to say you just have schizophrenia simply because what you hear in your head from Elizabeth is negative and insulting.

For some reason schizophrenia the voices are negative. im sorry

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Schitzo- subheading issue ,and pure schizophrenics ,are very different .a true schizophrenic couldn't post a full cohesive thread on a forum.

They live too much inside their own heads for that .

That being said,demons don't come in bunches ,with a succubus and the hatman along for the jaunt .

The minute its multiple entities ,and all kinds of metaphysical bemusments went on beforehand , mental issue or not ,its a bit over exaggerated ,and I am loathe to wonder if its just another troll thread.

I don't want to be rude though .....so ,bunches of demons flying around the room,and a succubus and the hatman were there too,is not real .

I say this as someone who believes in demons. I can see them ,and they dont manifest this way ,at all .

Demons are usually solo ,but can appear in different forms at different times .

Your des gription makes me think of one of those old 1940s cartoons of ghosts and ghoulies all flying around .

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Schitzo- subheading issue ,and pure schizophrenics ,are very different .a true schizophrenic couldn't post a full cohesive thread on a forum.

They live too much inside their own heads for that .

That being said,demons don't come in bunches ,with a succubus and the hatman along for the jaunt .

The minute its multiple entities ,and all kinds of metaphysical bemusments went on beforehand , mental issue or not ,its a bit over exaggerated ,and I am loathe to wonder if its just another troll thread.

I don't want to be rude though .....so ,bunches of demons flying around the room,and a succubus and the hatman were there too,is not real .

I say this as someone who believes in demons. I can see them ,and they dont manifest this way ,at all .

Demons are usually solo ,but can appear in different forms at different times .

Your des gription makes me think of one of those old 1940s cartoons of ghosts and ghoulies all flying around .

This is not a troll thread. And I didn't mean I saw them all at once, this is within a span of 8 years. Sorry you think it is but I believe you were reading my thread entirely out of context. Still, thank you about the comment on me being coherent. I am still really upset that I have such a diagnosis so I'm trying to figure out if what I see / hear is just in my head or not.

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First off, I want to point out that I'm very new to this site. And feel the urge to ask people such as yourselves whether I'm mentally ill or have a direct connection with the paranormal.

I was diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder ((mental illness that consists of major depression and psychosis)) around 3 years ago. But the majority of my "hallucinations" are......demonic, ghostly.

To start this off, I was extremely curious and STUPID in high school. My friends and I would always go to graveyards very late at night and literally harass spirits to communicate with us--I was the one who always tried to p*** them off / rial them up to get a reaction...and unfortunately, it worked. My friends and I have seen them, heard them. We even developed the "tapping game", where I would ask the spirits VERY personal questions, tap on my history book and wait for their yes or no response ((1 tap was a no, 2 was a yes)). Looking back on this, I am ashamed of myself for upsetting these spirits. Because now I'm "clinically insane".

The "delusions" I have involve Elizabeth, a spirit I used to talk to in high school. She used to live in my parents house but now seems to follow me wherever I go. She has multiple personality disorder and has lived a very frightening life. How I know this? My close friend and I played the "tapping game" with her 7 years ago. And she literally possessed my friend for a few minutes. She told me ((through my friend)) that her father used to beat her and rape her and eventually drowned her in my parents bath tub on the top floor of the house. The kitchen ceiling still leaks--even though my parents have tried many times to repair the plumbing and have even REMOVED the tub.

I hear Elizabeth talk in my head constantly and she hates me. She thinks that I am stupid and worthless and pathetic. It gets worse, though. Back 6 years ago when I was 16, 17 years old...when I finally decided to stop irritating and manipulating the paranormal...the paranormal started to bother me. I saw dark fogs, the hat man, and what I believe to be now a succubus. The succubus literally STILL enters my dreams. The dreams consist of a woman raveled in white cloth with wide eyes sucking me dry in my bed, me trying to scream for help / trying to wake up but I can't breath. My boyfriend has told me that every night I literally convulse in my sleep and stop breathing.

I've seen demons. Many of them are dark shadows scurrying around the floors, walls, and ceiling laughing at me and mocking me.

These are my "hallucinations".

Please be honest. Am I sick or is this a spiritual battle?

Hello J and welcome to the forum.

No one on the forum can give you a diagnosis on your situation (even if someone were to have a degree in mental health or physical medicine) no one on the forum can (or should) from a few lines written understand your situation well enough to tell you differently than the professionals who have been working with you. I hope you understand this is for your protection and well being!

Reading your story about the incidents with Elizabeth I do have an idea that may help you understand who or what Elizabeth may be. Elizabeth claimed that she was a spirit who who died violently in your parents home, if you truly want to know if there is any validity to this you could research it. You know the address of the property and if your parents own the home they have the deed and list of owners will be on the deed. You can then research who these people were at the local court house and library and find out if Elizabeth really did exist.

Even if you did mischief when you were younger (running around in graveyards and such) it has no bearing on your diagnosis. I highly doubt that your diagnosis is because you were a teenager who was into the supernatural. However, I would encourage you to talk to someone about the feelings of remorse you expressed about those youthful follies, someone you trust like your parents or therapist because they will be able to help you put those incidents into perspective.

Mabon.

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I think that you need to discuss all this with your doctor. While you very well may be seeing spirits and demons, some of your visions and anxiety could be caused by your medication. It also seems as though you carry alot of guilt about your "tormenting" of souls earlier in life. Perhaps you just need to come to terms with this, forgive yourself, and let it go. I hope things get better for you as I'm sure this is a very distressing and confusion situation for you.

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Sometimes nasty spirits can upset people who are vulnerable.

I do think you encountered real actual spirits during school pranks, because others witnessed it. Yet I'm not sure about "Elizabeth" being real, or those hallucinations. It seems like these experiences are a product of your illness. Mental illness like schizophrenia and psychosis can make a person feel the paranormal things going on. Maybe it's just that people who are sick are more sensitive to negative energies.

Either way I don't know.

Speak to your doctor about all of this. Do you have a nurse or carer looking out for you?

The meds can sometimes have awful side effects. If you start feeling dehydrated and have panic attacks then it's the meds. Tell your doctor this if the medicine is giving you the symptoms.

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  • 2 weeks later...

I wish people would not turn to a majic pill, especially for depression, anxiety etc. Ive had terrible anxiety when I was younger, couldnt talk to people, or be in damily events. I though very little of myseld, but I moved, travelled, got in a little sketchy situations, but experience made my life better. Also, music and 3d modelling, something that takes a hugh level of concentration and visualization. Good luck with that . Its never in good taste to torment the dead, even kharma wise. If someone was dancing on my grand mothers grave I might wish then a punishment worse than death, but maybe not. ;) forgive yourself is a good start.

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  • 3 weeks later...

Yes. I've been diagnosed schizoaffective by 3 psychiatric doctors now. And I am on medication. But I can still see spirits and feel them??? Maybe it is illness it's just strange that a lot of the things I've seen / heard, many others have stated saying they've seen / heard similar things. I'm really worried I'm suffering from demonic oppression because I literally forget days.

you dont have sckizo nothing friend you are just afraid...forgive your self , work, work hard...and it will all go away....if it doesnt...you are not on your own ...find good ppl and friends, surround your self with good energy it helps more than you can imagine.

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I'm just talking in "ifs" here - but if this according to you originates with the spirit Elizabeth, who you reckon has multi personality disorder, then no matter what else is going on, it seems pointless to ignore this element of it.

"Multiple personality" in a spirit is a sign of fragmented spirit, you are not even dealing with the whole spirit/soul but a splitting of it, the residual part of trauma part. It requires a healer /medium who can extract any fragments, cut the cords /attachments and move the spirit over to a more peaceful dimension for it's own healing and autonomy, as it is not supposed to be earth bound like this. Spirits that are fragmented like this just become crazier and more demented as time goes on, there is nothing to gain from allowing such discordance to exist in our plane like this.

Once this has been done then see how things lay. You yourself may require extensive healing as well and i would recommend you find a proper healer for this purpose, you are in no fit condition to try any of this yourself, but i would suggest a healing practice by someone talented in this area who can focus on your hara alignment. That is what you want to ask for.

On the medical side, don't by any means abandon that, but make sure you are being reviewed for any medication you are on also.

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Hi, I understand your frustration and confusion with all this because I do believe to be going through something similar to you. I don't mean to fuel your belief or anything but yes. It is a spiritual battle. You are indeed quite psychic in your own way. Feel free to send me messages and i'll help you through this. We're all gods creation and we need to help eachother because we are all connected somehow. Don't pay attention to the people telling you to go see a doctor because deep down inside im sure you feel the truth, which is spiritual. It is very real and there are many ways to help yourself.

I feel the need to help you so here it is: this was recommended to me by a friend who has knowledge of demons and spirits. You should buy yourself some sage and go to the room where Elizabeth died and bless it in the name of God. Be prepared however, this will be very hard. You need to understand that you are the most equipped person to handle this situation because it has latched itself to you. Have faith and know that heaven isn't blind to your suffering. Recite a prayer every night before sleeping aswell. I know it can be hard to sleep when you have had all these experiences. Good luck and keep me posted

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Matt,

I'm not trying to be antagonistic... but you came on the forum seeking answers for your own situation. so what makes you qualified to help this person when the methods aren't helping your situation?

The OP stated she has a diagnosed illness which can cause hallucinations. Feeding fear is irresponsible in my opinion. Long story short there was lady on the forum who related her own life story. Her husband suffered a closed head injured from a wreck. The doctors warned that hallucinations could result from the injury. When the hallucinations started a minister informed her husband that he was actually being oppressed by demons and not hallucinations. That evening after the minister left he killed himself because he couldn't handle the idea of 'demons' leaving his wife and infant daughter to deal with the aftermath.

So before you get upset with people who advise the person to stick with the professionals who are currently providing care especially when the person states they have a known illness which causes hallucinations or could be life threatening should they disregard/discard medical treatment, think of this widow and her daughter.

Mabon,

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First off, I want to point out that I'm very new to this site. And feel the urge to ask people such as yourselves whether I'm mentally ill or have a direct connection with the paranormal.

I was diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder ((mental illness that consists of major depression and psychosis)) around 3 years ago. But the majority of my "hallucinations" are......demonic, ghostly.

To start this off, I was extremely curious and STUPID in high school. My friends and I would always go to graveyards very late at night and literally harass spirits to communicate with us--I was the one who always tried to p*** them off / rial them up to get a reaction...and unfortunately, it worked. My friends and I have seen them, heard them. We even developed the "tapping game", where I would ask the spirits VERY personal questions, tap on my history book and wait for their yes or no response ((1 tap was a no, 2 was a yes)). Looking back on this, I am ashamed of myself for upsetting these spirits. Because now I'm "clinically insane".

Thank you for being so open, and receiving replies with an open mind. I would like to point out first of all, that this should be viewed as an indicator that your underlying mental wellbeing is generally sound, even if you are suffering from some acute issues.

I would like to discuss what appears to be the germinal event leading to your current dilemma - the episode(s) in the graveyard. You seem adamant that you, self-confessed as naive when young, were contacted by angry spirits after you "deliberately annoyed them". How do you know, being as naive as you were, that it was not those who accompanied you who were responsible for this "feedback" - perhaps in some misconstrued attempt to "teach you a lesson" about being contrary (as you admit you were being)?

Please do not use what has happened since (the guilt, etc) to justify that it was, indeed, spirits who were annoyed by your actions - because what has happened since may be self-inflicted based on your perception of what occurred in that graveyard. If your perception was incorrect, however, then you are punishing yourself for nothing.

So, if you could please go back to the beginning and start looking again from there, I'd appreciate it. And I hope you aren't in any way offended by my inquiries or the implications of them, as I mean no insult or disrespect.

Edited by Leonardo
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Matt,

I'm not trying to be antagonistic... but you came on the forum seeking answers for your own situation. so what makes you qualified to help this person when the methods aren't helping your situation?

The OP stated she has a diagnosed illness which can cause hallucinations. Feeding fear is irresponsible in my opinion. Long story short there was lady on the forum who related her own life story. Her husband suffered a closed head injured from a wreck. The doctors warned that hallucinations could result from the injury. When the hallucinations started a minister informed her husband that he was actually being oppressed by demons and not hallucinations. That evening after the minister left he killed himself because he couldn't handle the idea of 'demons' leaving his wife and infant daughter to deal with the aftermath.

So before you get upset with people who advise the person to stick with the professionals who are currently providing care especially when the person states they have a known illness which causes hallucinations or could be life threatening should they disregard/discard medical treatment, think of this widow and her daughter.

Mabon,

You're very correct I must of confused why she was asking for advice, I thought she was trying to do a pros and cons type of thing to both situations. I totally agree to never discontinue health care, what I mean to say is that she already knows to continue health care, I gave her the other side of things, its important as a constant learner to consider all possibilities and analyse and digest them in the way they see fit. Yes she admits to having schizophrenia but I myself (choose to believe me or not! Im not shoving this down your throat) believe she has a spiritual fight to consider aswell as mental. I've seen the mental part being progressed by proffesionals and I've found that it is not a solution but simply a way of giving the sufferer abit more confidence in their control over it.

The only reason I said what I said is because in order to fully feel liberated even if the liberated is with or without an illness is too to fight darkness with light. Illuminating darkness always shows you things you didn't want to see, but hey, they we're always there.

Sorry for all the metaphorical jists' but I do consider myself to be abit qualified considering that I have been treated for schizophrenia myself. I don't need to explain everything about myself in order to be qualified do I? Trust and Faith is my qualification.

As for my topic about asking help, it was a way for me to get contact with people who can genuinly help and comfort. Im thankful enough as is for those who have reached out. Less so for those who seem to be on auto pilot with "continue medical treatment you're sick". We already know to do that! We're simply educating ourselves to get an arsernal of confidence and friends along the way. People don't come to forums saying these things to get told to go see a doctor.. Anybody who can read or write already know to do that.. They chose this outlet so treat it as such, as an outlet, not a crisis phone line..

PS: The methods I underline have worked, and they always do work. Im also open to other interpretations and ideas as long as they seem to relate to the topic and OP

Edited by Matt Boudreau
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Matt,

thank you for responding and a belated welcome to the forum. (bad on my part for the lack of social graces).

Don't worry about the metaphysical metaphors it's all good. I often get branded a skeptic on the forum and for the most part am skeptical as it is a neutral framework to work from. Or put another way I do try to listen to what the poster is saying and will look (first) for mundane explanation (and not the hackneyed swamp gas one either).

I've enjoyed being a part of the forum for several years and my opinions on some issues have changed over time. At one point in time I believed naively, that people would understand and be respectful and responsible to others who needed help (regardless, what that form took). If someone posts a story I ask lots of questions if they haven't filled in enough detail about their experience. Nothing personal just things important to the experience. Things like who, what, when, where, how often things like that which can help understand what they're trying to explain.

Like I said earlier, I look for mundane explanations first and after a few years on here I have developed a long list of misunderstood or misidentified things which can be what their experience was or things to check off the list. One of the things is a list of medical conditions which can be mistaken for paranormal events so I usually ask for the person to look to their physical health to see if there are health issues because I believe that should be considered. I find no difference if someone is bi-polar or has a heart condition, they are both conditions and for me no stigma is attached to either one of them. People need help in many different ways and unless we listen and try to understand where they are coming from we can't help them.

I do also understand people having a crisis of faith. However, crisis of faith usually isn't life threatening which is why I start with the physical world. I try to never discourage or belittle a person's chosen path, nor do I try to dictate to them which one to choose but ask them to find the one that resonates with them and there is no reason in the world that those two disciplines (science/medicine and faith) can't work together in harmony.

And sadly you might be surprised how many people don't look to their own physical health first when in a state of crisis. When in a state of crisis people aren't thinking clearly, they are reacting. Heart conditions can cause hallucinations, stress , lack of sleep and a host of other medical issues as well as grief or PTSD for example. Sometimes people describe what sounds like carbon monoxide poisoning and I ask them to look into their heating system. None of these states of being deserve mockery nor do they negated that something unexplained may be occurring at the same time and for me it's a slow careful process to know how to proceed. The ones I enjoy the most are the ones who are open and want to understand their experience regardless if it was supernatural or misidentified or just what the heck was that? Those are the people I truly enjoy.

Anywho, I'll quit rambling,

Mabon.

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First off, I want to point out that I'm very new to this site. And feel the urge to ask people such as yourselves whether I'm mentally ill or have a direct connection with the paranormal. You have an unhealthy attachment to spirits.

I was diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder ((mental illness that consists of major depression and psychosis)) around 3 years ago. But the majority of my "hallucinations" are......demonic, ghostly. Schizoaffective disorder and schizophrenia is caused by evil spirits in the invisible spirit world. The devil can drive a person insane (psychotic). You have your own choice of who and what to believe.

To start this off, I was extremely curious and STUPID in high school. My friends and I would always go to graveyards very late at night and literally harass spirits to communicate with us--I was the one who always tried to p*** them off / rial them up to get a reaction...and unfortunately, it worked. My friends and I have seen them, heard them. We even developed the "tapping game", where I would ask the spirits VERY personal questions, tap on my history book and wait for their yes or no response ((1 tap was a no, 2 was a yes)). Looking back on this, I am ashamed of myself for upsetting these spirits. Because now I'm "clinically insane".

The "delusions" I have involve Elizabeth, a spirit I used to talk to in high school. She used to live in my parents house but now seems to follow me wherever I go. She has multiple personality disorder and has lived a very frightening life. How I know this? My close friend and I played the "tapping game" with her 7 years ago. And she literally possessed my friend for a few minutes. She told me ((through my friend)) that her father used to beat her and rape her and eventually drowned her in my parents bath tub on the top floor of the house. The kitchen ceiling still leaks--even though my parents have tried many times to repair the plumbing and have even REMOVED the tub.

I hear Elizabeth talk in my head constantly and she hates me. She thinks that I am stupid and worthless and pathetic. She is evil because she is without God. All spirits without God are evil. This is hell. It gets worse, though. Back 6 years ago when I was 16, 17 years old...when I finally decided to stop irritating and manipulating the paranormal...the paranormal started to bother me. I saw dark fogs, the hat man, and what I believe to be now a succubus. The succubus literally STILL enters my dreams. The dreams consist of a woman raveled in white cloth with wide eyes sucking me dry in my bed, me trying to scream for help / trying to wake up but I can't breath. My boyfriend has told me that every night I literally convulse in my sleep and stop breathing.

I've seen demons. I've seen two demons with horns on their heads and their voices sounded evil. God put horns on their heads so they could not be deceiving. One of them told me that his job was to do evil to me. They are very violent creatures. Many of them are dark shadows scurrying around the floors, walls, and ceiling laughing at me and mocking me.

These are my "hallucinations".

Please be honest. Am I sick or is this a spiritual battle? You are not sick. It is a spiritual battle. You need to stop doing whatever it is that is bringing them into your life. And turn to Jesus so that he can deliver you from being evil like them in the afterlife. He will gather you to your people. Unlike them who are without family and friends.

While awake -

1) I have seen Jesus. He looked magnificent.

2) I have heard Father God say, "the battle against good and evil has been here since the beginning of time". His voice sounds of greatness not of this world.

3) I have seen the Holy Spirit.

4) I have seen and heard my guardian angel calling out my name. Her voice was much more beautiful than any human voice.

5) I have seen two demons and was possessed by one twice trying to sit on God's throne.

6) And I have witnessed supernatural powers of the invisible spirit world.

Again, you can believe whoever and whatever you wish. I am not here to argue nor debate with anyone. Good luck!!

Edited by notforgotten
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I wish to point out the post above ^^ represents all that is wrong with religion, and should be totally ignored by the OP who is seeking genuine help and advice, not religious dogma designed to impress someone into a religion via fear.

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I wish to point out the post above ^^ represents all that is wrong with religion, and should be totally ignored by the OP who is seeking genuine help and advice, not religious dogma designed to impress someone into a religion via fear.

A person needn't be fearful of the truth. It's the lie that destroys.

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A person needn't be fearful of the truth. It's the lie that destroys.

You weren't promoting the truth, notforgotten, you were promoting your truth. That which you believe, but it is not that which is true for anyone but yourself.

Trying to turn a person to religion, any religion, by playing on fear is reprehensible.

Edited by Leonardo
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