"Homeless" People with Cardboard Signs

[pallidin 8,350]

To begin, I'm all for giving to the truly poor and disadvantaged. Not that I've done it often, but a few times.

Where I live I see people, usually the exact same people, at street corners such as at Walmart with a cardboard sign with some brief "written-on-the-sign" story and asking for help(sometimes work, but usually money)

This makes me mad, because I know there are people truly in need of help, and I also know there are lazy scammers. These day's I just can't tell the differance, though maybe it's always been that way.

Anyway, my point is that I feel reluctant to hand money(a couple bucks) over to these cardboard carriers because I get the sense that I am being scammed.

Yet, I feel bad for some of those that I pass by, giving nothing, that might truly need help, because I AM NOW JADED towards ALL the cardboard carriers.

Any thoughts?

[Ashotep 13,713]

I feel for the people that really need help but the scammers make it hard to want to give to someone carrying a sign. I bet some of them are there because they can't stop drinking alcohol or whatever long enough to get a job or keep it if they did. Still hate to see a human starve even if its is from their own stupidity.

[seaturtlehorsesnake 8,939]

why should it bother you? if you give a dollar or so to someone running a scam (if there really are that many people doing that) it's not a loss. and if they genuinely need help, well, you've helped them. does it really hurt you that much?

i've given money to people, and i don't really care what they do with it afterwards. that's their business.

[shrooma 4,282]

in the UK, homeless people sell a magazine called "the big issue", and it gives them the dignity of not having to beg, like they're earning the money you give them.

it's a good indicator that they ARE actually homeless, not scamming, and i sometimes buy two a week, from different people, because i've been homeless before, years ago, and can appreciate just how hard it can be on the streets.

it's not a perfect system, but it's better than nothing i guess.....

[Q-C 3,459]

This is strictly my choice, not one I expect others to make: I care if they use my money for an alcohol or drug habit. I want to help others not hurt them further. I give to organizations who help the homeless. Sometimes these people are from shelters and they have to leave during the day, and this is what they do. So I prefer to give to the local groups that are trying to help them. I'll also give water and food to those on the corner and dog food if they have one.

They ask for money at our big intersections here in Houston. I've never seen that anywhere else. They have neon vests they wear and wander in and out of the cars (12-16 lanes of traffic) handing out a slip of paper about a shelter for money collection. My H has seen one then go into the local grocery store's bathroom and put all the cash into his pockets, leaving coins for the shelter, and return out to ask for more money.

Again, I want to help, not add to any existing problems, so for me personally, I choose to volunteer at or donate directly to (money, clothing, bedding) those local places that do help and are overwhelmed, over crowded, and short on money.

Also, sometimes, you don't have to look farther than the end of your nose to find family or friends or neighbors in extreme need too. If money embarrasses them there are dozens of other ways to help them.

We have offered them jobs too, I forgot. It worked out well for a couple, but one it was not a good idea that worked out well. Got a little scary, but that was one incident.

Edited July 14, 2013 by QuiteContrary

[EllJay 6,413]

They may be poor but they ain't dumb.

[Queenregena 11]

why should it bother you? if you give a dollar or so to someone running a scam (if there really are that many people doing that) it's not a loss. and if they genuinely need help, well, you've helped them. does it really hurt you that much?

i've given money to people, and i don't really care what they do with it afterwards. that's their business.

[Daughter of the Nine Moons 6,827]

I give to organizations who help the homeless.

This^

[seaturtlehorsesnake 8,939]

I give to organizations who help the homeless. Sometimes these people are from shelters and they have to leave during the day, and this is what they do. So I prefer to give to the local groups that are trying to help them. I'll also give water and food to those on the corner and dog food if they have one.

that's fair.

[Simbi Laveau 4,430]

As a new Yorker ,I grew up with this.

Beggars are far fewer ,thanks to ghoulianni and bloombarf clamping down on them ,but in the good olde days,they washed your windshield .

Without fail. At the corner of The bowery and Houston .

You would yell,no no no ,and they wouldnt stop .

So they used to at least provide a service .ghoulianni made it illegal ,so they stopped.

Then they arrest them if they beg in places the cops are told to clear them out .

As a medic,I picked some of these people up ,and they used to be doctors ,lawyers,who lost it all.

There are back stories you don't expect.

But then there would be kids on avenue A. Obnoxious rich brats who left their home in Westchester ,for a punk rock drug addled life.

I would curse them out . They had sneakers on more expensive than my frigging car cost .

You can smell out who is who.

W used to buy coffee and bagels for the guys by my hospital ,and one refused.Wanted only money .

We said ,why,so you can buy booze.

No...

One guy ,by my old hospital in the Bronx . He was aways in rags ,and had his dog with him.

He was out there,rain or shine.

97 degrees,5 degrees.

I realized,it WAS HIS JOB .

he went to work faithfully every day . The was not rude or pushy . Thanked everyone who gave him something. He couldnt get a regular job,so this was his job.

Even if I missed his hand because of a green light,I dropped quarters on the walkway as I drove by ,so he would find them.

There are scammers,but not all. People in these situations,are gods way of teaching us humility.

There but for the grace of god,go i..........

Look closer at them . Maybe chat with a few ,and You will know who is what . When you do know ,be kind ...

<3

[Q-C 3,459]

*off topic* we will also give food and beverages to strikers and protesters if we believe in their cause.

[Grandpa Greenman 9,174]

I lived in a National Forest and I knew a lot of homeless people. Some were in real need, some were between jobs, some were there because the like living in the woods. One day after work I was in a parking lot puting some oil in the truck. A guy came up and ask for a buck to help get out of town. I looked up and it was one of those guys who liked living in the woods was standing there. When he saw it was me he laughed and sorry. I just said, "ya, I wish you were leaving town, before you go you got the 5 you owe me" He pulled out a big wad of bills and give me my five. He was still there when I left town. Don't feel bad for passing them by.

Edited July 14, 2013 by Darkwind

[shrooma 4,282]

As a new Yorker ,I grew up with this.

Beggars are far fewer ,thanks to ghoulianni and bloombarf clamping down on them ,but in the good olde days,they washed your windshield .

Without fail. At the corner of The bowery and Houston .

You would yell,no no no ,and they wouldnt stop .

So they used to at least provide a service .ghoulianni made it illegal ,so they stopped.

Then they arrest them if they beg in places the cops are told to clear them out .

As a medic,I picked some of these people up ,and they used to be doctors ,lawyers,who lost it all.

There are back stories you don't expect.

But then there would be kids on avenue A. Obnoxious rich brats who left their home in Westchester ,for a punk rock drug addled life.

I would curse them out . They had sneakers on more expensive than my frigging car cost .

You can smell out who is who.

W used to buy coffee and bagels for the guys by my hospital ,and one refused.Wanted only money .

We said ,why,so you can buy booze.

No...

One guy ,by my old hospital in the Bronx . He was aways in rags ,and had his dog with him.

He was out there,rain or shine.

97 degrees,5 degrees.

I realized,it WAS HIS JOB .

he went to work faithfully every day . The was not rude or pushy . Thanked everyone who gave him something. He couldnt get a regular job,so this was his job.

Even if I missed his hand because of a green light,I dropped quarters on the walkway as I drove by ,so he would find them.

There are scammers,but not all. People in these situations,are gods way of teaching us humility.

There but for the grace of god,go i..........

Look closer at them . Maybe chat with a few ,and You will know who is what . When you do know ,be kind ...

<3

.

every. single. word. of that makes sense.

you should run for president simbi, i'd vote for you!

(if they let foreigners vote in your elections, which they don't, but i'm sure Darkwind wouldn't mind voting twice.....)

;-)

[spud the mackem 4,592]

I hopped on a bus one night as my car was poorly(in garage),and these 2 guys got on,both had thin looking dogs,(in the U.K.you get extra benefit to feed the dog)they sat and counted out their cash for the day,one had £65($98)the other had £42($73),not bad for sitting in the subway,thats better than working in McDonalds,and you get home every night on the last bus....I used to give these guys money,but now I donate to the Salvation Army,who look after the homeless.

[glorybebe 5,574]

I will not give organizations due the abuse of the 'needy'. If you can afford tailor made cigarettes, wth are you doing in a food bank line? Quit being so selfish and quite smoking so you can buy groceries for your kids. I did see a guy who was desperate and begging outside the mall. It was a hot day so I went into the grocery store and bought him a sandwich and a big bottle of water. I thought he was going to cry. He hadn't had food for a couple of days. He thanked me over and over- that was someone who really needed help and wasn't just looking for money to buy booze or cigs

Edited July 15, 2013 by glorybebe

[Beany 2,539]

Maybe the point isn't about someone's state of neediness but about our willingness to be generous & share what we have. I no longer get wrapped tight about what someone is going to do with the money I give them or try to divine whether they are truly hungry or deserving, or what else they might be spending on the money on that I might disapprove of. What's important is that I open up my heart, take a chance, and share what little I have. Certainly with millions of people still out of work, or who have lost their homes or all their liquid assets and personal property, the odds are pretty good that we're going to run into someone needy. And if I give money to a scammer, the shame is on them, not me. I refuse to be p***ed off or foolish because I made a generous gesture, especially over a couple of bucks.

As Simbi said, maybe it's god's way to teach us humility.

A friend once speculated that perhaps the hungry & homeless are here to give us opportunities to learn generosity and giving freely with no strings attached; in other words, they are our teachers. What's important is that we give, within our means, to help our fellow human beings, whether it be cash to an individual or organization, food donations or volunteer work, etc.

[Odd Requiem 449]

Most homeless people I pass are at the exits or intersections of my shopping centers. I'll hand over random groceries. At least I know my generosity isn't going to nonsense. Of course, when I get home and I'm missing the item I specifically went to the store for, I say a few choice words and sulk in the corner.

[F3SS 15,928]

Palladin, grifters have been around since the dawn of our time or at least soon after. I do hate getting stuck at a red light when one is right next to me for two minutes. And I don't feel bad passing them by. I don't trust that they're so helpless and assume most are scheming. I passed one last week at a grifting hotspot which is a main artery in and out of the city and is often congested. I came up on him slowly crawling through traffic and he almost fit the part except for his bright clean new shoes.

[Sakari 9,740]

One thing I all ways do, not matter what....If they have a dog with them, I buy a cheap plastic bowl, bottled water, and a few cans of dog food, or a bag of dog food.....And I say, here you go, this is for your dog, he looks hungry and thirsty.

I all ways do this.....

[DeWitz 1,330]

I lived in a National Forest and I knew a lot of homeless people. Some were in real need, some were between jobs, some were there because the like living in the woods. One day after work I was in a parking lot puting some oil in the truck. A guy came up and ask for a buck to help get out of town. I looked up and it was one of those guys who liked living in the woods was standing there. When he saw it was me he laughed and sorry. I just said, "ya, I wish you were leaving town, before you go you got the 5 you owe me" He pulled out a big wad of bills and give me my five. He was still there when I left town. Don't feel bad for passing them by.

That is an absolutely classic account of 'living in the USA!'

[.saraharas. 2,715]

I refuse to be p***ed off or foolish because I made a generous gesture, especially over a couple of bucks.

Ditto this ^^

Someone once tried to make me feel bad for paying for a stranger's coffee in the drive thru. I do this occasionally, many people do - but the person who was with me this day actually seemed baffled (and maybe offended) that I would waste money like that because there was no way of me knowing if the gesture was actually appreciated.

It's not about that for me, it's about selflessness and taking a chance.

I look at anything I give to be received as a gift. If I give my niece money for her birthday, I don't care what she does with it. It's hers. The same goes for if I happen to give a homeless person or busker a dollar or two. Most of the time what you are going to be dealing with is a person who is struggling, whether it be homelessness, addiction, both or more, or none of the above. And if I choose to give them money than I also choose not to judge how they use it. It's none of my business.

[markdohle 4,319]

I lived in a National Forest and I knew a lot of homeless people. Some were in real need, some were between jobs, some were there because the like living in the woods. One day after work I was in a parking lot puting some oil in the truck. A guy came up and ask for a buck to help get out of town. I looked up and it was one of those guys who liked living in the woods was standing there. When he saw it was me he laughed and sorry. I just said, "ya, I wish you were leaving town, before you go you got the 5 you owe me" He pulled out a big wad of bills and give me my five. He was still there when I left town. Don't feel bad for passing them by.

I would think that many who find themselves in that position, did not plan it and want out. Some like panhandling, others may be mentally ill. I give outside the city at a few spots. I do this because it would have an adverse affect on me if I always passed others by who need help. I may be there one day. However, I understand those who don't give. I think most people help out in other ways, perhaps more time consuming.

peace

mark

[Purplos 866]

Look closer at them . Maybe chat with a few ,and You will know who is what . When you do know ,be kind ...

Seeing them as an opportunity to practice generosity with no strings attached is great.

Seeing them as people, and getting to know them as people is better, in my opinion.

In your small realm of life - the area you operate in most days - you'll probably get to recognize the usual characters who panhandle or just hang around hoping. Go up and talk to them. You'll figure out who is worthy of your time and efforts... just like you do with 'normal' non-homeless or needy people.

[Sakari 9,740]

[bLu3 de 3n3rgy 1,011]

I agree with beany and sarah.

My Dad always says there is no such thing as getting something for free. He's said this repeatedly since I can remember. I often said to him, that is not always true, people can and do give away things for nothing. He always said "No, there is always a catch, there is no such thing as something for free, the moment you take something for free, you contract, be it your time or freedom"

It's sad that people do abuse the concept of giving and receiving but it is present in our societies and that equally many women are so conditioned to be givers/helpers, even if it is unhealthy or putting them in danger. It's a trick that predators/abusers all to often use, that they can get what they want, take advanatge or control by giving, in order to receive back. Sadly children and teenagers are victims of this trap all too often.

Then on a lesser extreme, enough people out there use giving and receiving with conditions, as a way to exert their authority or power, which is why it is unspoken contract to take/accept - forget the giving part for a moment, Even if you do practise unconditional giving and receiving, the other person may not and if they do not, then they will try to screw you over somehow.

So does it really exist, except only when two parties are on the same page?

When it comes to your loved ones, family and true friends, the art of giving and receiving is supposed to be one built on trust, loyalty and respect. But the biggest fall outs and family break downs are caused when communications involving giving and receiving break down.

When it comes to the homeless and needy that is different, I think if you come across them in your daily path then giving without conditions is the way to be, i think getting riled up or becoming moronic over what you think your money is being used for, is one of the biggest mirrors you can find yourself flashed by. I think it definitely teaches us to think about giving in a different light.

Edited July 15, 2013 by bLu3 de 3n3rgy