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withdrawal symptoms...?


ambelamba

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I gotta confess. I've stopped a certain psych med for more than four months. The common withdrawal symptoms are very devastating. I am supposed to suffer something really nasty.

Except that nothing of such happened.

But I am changing. I am becoming edgier and somewhat arrogant inside. It's somewhat disturbing because in real life I try to be as nice as possible, since more often than not I happen to work next to some big names in the showbiz. Probably the biggest name I worked closely with on a scene was RDJ.

I can feel that I am becoming some kind of A-hole. I don't express it but I know that I am becoming nastier inside, and I am afraid of it. I am becoming more expressive emotionally, and I tend to make more gestures and facial expressions than before, and this kind of behaviors are not acceptable among Koreans.

The biggest change is my sense of humor. I am becoming less and less stoic. My irreverent sense of humor is getting bigger. I almost got into a trouble a few days ago because I mocked the producer of the show I got booked for next 12 weeks. And the producer is the most famous presenter in America. I made a Family Guy-level joke on him on the set and luckily crew members didn't hear me.

Unfortunately I can't change my next appointment with my psychiatrist because...you know, it's VA. I have to make do until the end of September.

Cherry on top, I have known this girl for a while and she happened to be a fellow regular on this comedy drama. I'll get to the point:She is married. And she knows that I have a crush on her. Interesting thing is that she seemed to be very upset when I was happily chatting with another extra who just looks like Mrs. John Travolta, I mean, Kelly Preston. The girl suddenly got a cold expression on her face when she saw me BSing with Mrs. Travolta-lookalike.The reason why I am saying is that if I suppress my emotions and hide them, I get into a massive psychosis. I got into a trouble more than a decade ago because I was completely suppressing my emotion and I ended up snapping. To avoid that now I tell everyone how I feel. Especially about the married background actress.

Good thing is that I don't have any psychosis, but I am becoming more expressive and arrogant. And Google didn't help me figure out what the hell is going on.

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I'm not exactly sure what you're looking for, but whatever it is, you won't find the answer here or on google. Consult the doctor who originally prescribed your medication, or see another professional.

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Best of luck for you. Mental illness is a b****. I know, as I also suffer.

I was "normal" in my younger year's, than "bamn", it hit me hard. Still does at times for me.

Some people have cancer, or diabetes, or such. I just so happen to have a bad mind after many years of being just fine.

Don't know what to say. It's a difficult subject and each person is different.

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To add, after 4 months you should no longer experience "withdrawal" symptoms from stoping any drug.

What I suspect(and I'm no doctor) is that you need "something"

So, please go back to your doc.

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I gotta confess. I've stopped a certain psych med for more than four months. The common withdrawal symptoms are very devastating. I am supposed to suffer something really nasty.

Except that nothing of such happened.

But I am changing. I am becoming edgier and somewhat arrogant inside. It's somewhat disturbing because in real life I try to be as nice as possible, since more often than not I happen to work next to some big names in the showbiz. Probably the biggest name I worked closely with on a scene was RDJ.

I can feel that I am becoming some kind of A-hole. I don't express it but I know that I am becoming nastier inside, and I am afraid of it. I am becoming more expressive emotionally, and I tend to make more gestures and facial expressions than before, and this kind of behaviors are not acceptable among Koreans.

The biggest change is my sense of humor. I am becoming less and less stoic. My irreverent sense of humor is getting bigger. I almost got into a trouble a few days ago because I mocked the producer of the show I got booked for next 12 weeks. And the producer is the most famous presenter in America. I made a Family Guy-level joke on him on the set and luckily crew members didn't hear me.

Unfortunately I can't change my next appointment with my psychiatrist because...you know, it's VA. I have to make do until the end of September.

Cherry on top, I have known this girl for a while and she happened to be a fellow regular on this comedy drama. I'll get to the point:She is married. And she knows that I have a crush on her. Interesting thing is that she seemed to be very upset when I was happily chatting with another extra who just looks like Mrs. John Travolta, I mean, Kelly Preston. The girl suddenly got a cold expression on her face when she saw me BSing with Mrs. Travolta-lookalike.The reason why I am saying is that if I suppress my emotions and hide them, I get into a massive psychosis. I got into a trouble more than a decade ago because I was completely suppressing my emotion and I ended up snapping. To avoid that now I tell everyone how I feel. Especially about the married background actress.

Good thing is that I don't have any psychosis, but I am becoming more expressive and arrogant. And Google didn't help me figure out what the hell is going on.

That's sounds ruff, I'm sorry you have to go through that. When I would drink alcohol ( something native Americans should never do) I learned about lack of control. It was very disturbing to me. But that is nothing like you are going through. Might I suggest learning to meditate. It can't hurt and has the potential to help you in these transitions

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That's sounds ruff, I'm sorry you have to go through that. When I would drink alcohol ( something native Americans should never do) I learned about lack of control. It was very disturbing to me. But that is nothing like you are going through. Might I suggest learning to meditate. It can't hurt and has the potential to help you in these transitions

Absolutely! I'd love to meditate but I can't do it alone. I can meditate best when I do it in a group meeting. But I live in Inland Empire and I have trouble finding a right place near my house.

Since you mentioned alcohol, you are absolutely right. Some group of people can't process alcohol, such as Australian Aborigines.

You know, I guess stress is a major factor why I am acting up. It can be a form of compensation. I am going through a financial difficulty and if that goes away then I bet most of my current problems will just go away. You might not agree but even my brother-in-law agrees with me. And he is the most sound-minded guy I've ever met.

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To add, after 4 months you should no longer experience "withdrawal" symptoms from stoping any drug.

What I suspect(and I'm no doctor) is that you need "something"

So, please go back to your doc.

Good thing is that she seems to be the ONLY competent psych doc in the VA hospital. My previous one in Downtown LA was a nice guy, but he didn't actively looking into my problems.

Actually it was my current psych who suspected that I really don't have any devastating problem. Maybe I fit into some unique personality type. One psychologist pointed that I have a form of OCD that is related to religious behaviors. And although there was no official diagnosis some people suspected that I might have Asperger's syndrome. Gotta ask the psych about that.

Many years ago I took a very serious personality test and the result indicated that I really fit into the profile of many character actors out there. I still remember that. Main reason why I did not pursue acting was that agents really hate people with accents, even if they are ethnic. And people like me are expected to be really athletic in the showbiz. And I am a total butter finger and have really slow reflexes.

If I were raised in America since early childhood, I might have spent some time at the high school drama club. You know how drama nerds are. My youngest sister joined when she went to a high school in San Gabriel Valley and she got sick of other drama club kids because they were really weird. And I am quirky like those kids.

But you know...maybe it would be better if my handicaps makes me stay away from acting business. In fact a guy who was an assistant and lover of a major talent agent in a big agency suggested that I really should try acting. But I declined because I really didn't want to be a prima donna. Even if I became one and be like John Cho or Ken Jeong, chances were I would have croaked already with massive overdose years ago.

I am trying my luck in art one last time. I will take a storyboard class this fall and build a new portfolio to submit to an agency. Even in irregular freelance works, few people make $500 a day doing nothing but sketching a few dozen frames a day. And that's a starting pay if you ever sign with an agency. And some really skilled guys go beyond that. I guess I am a nice and funny guy so I might end up doing some heavy stuff for big shots, if everything goes alright. If you are not a A-lister, you'd better have a nice attitude...especially when you work behind the camera.

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