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The George And The Dragon is now open.


Mark One

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1 hour ago, Matt221 said:

Frogger now there's  a game and only 10p a go, still think I'll give the pool a miss

Gawd lad.  If you struggle as the game gets tricky take my advice and sink a couple of pints.  That`ll ease the tension and make it easier to play(ish).

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Quotes the frogger mantra before playing. “Froggy, froggy, you’re so dodgy as you jump across the screen. May the joystick gods take pity on this lowly tadpoles soul as I guide thee through too victory.” Amen!

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3 hours ago, newbloodmoon said:

Quotes the frogger mantra before playing. “Froggy, froggy, you’re so dodgy as you jump across the screen. May the joystick gods take pity on this lowly tadpoles soul as I guide thee through too victory.” Amen!

Thanks for that prayer Bob.  These new gadgets such as the colour TV, handheld calculators and the computer entertainment cabinets really give me the goose bumps.  How do they do all of those things?  If you want my opinion (being a lad from the 50s) its all witchcraft John.  I`m still bracing myself for when Dark Derek returns for a port and lemon.  Gawd knows what he will have become in this vibrantly coloured decade.  

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I had a cracking fish supper last night at Harry Hungs chippy.  Hes a right rum-un mind.  In the back of his chip shop you can see workers carefully cutting spuds and skinning fish.  Apart from that being a tad odd I also noticed the sounds of typewriters and dog-n-bones ringing constantly.  His business is defo on the up and his battered bangers are to die for onnit.

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6 minutes ago, Mark One said:

I had a cracking fish supper last night at Harry Hungs chippy.  Hes a right rum-un mind.  In the back of his chip shop you can see workers carefully cutting spuds and skinning fish.  Apart from that being a tad odd I also noticed the sounds of typewriters and dog-n-bones ringing constantly.  His business is defo on the up and his battered bangers are to die for onnit.

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Thats ridiculous...i have never heard him say love, now mate or comrad yes, even heard him call one guy buddy, but never 'love'. 

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3 minutes ago, freetoroam said:

Thats ridiculous...i have never heard him say love, now mate or comrad yes, even heard him call one guy buddy, but never 'love'. 

Hes still learning the lingo, bless him.  But his workers are hypo efficient.  As soon as you order, Harry claps his hands and orders his staff around with a nasty voice.

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On 12/04/2018 at 6:49 AM, newbloodmoon said:

Quotes the frogger mantra before playing. “Froggy, froggy, you’re so dodgy as you jump across the screen. May the joystick gods take pity on this lowly tadpoles soul as I guide thee through too victory.” Amen!

What are you doing! This is not a place of prayer and god things. If i can not have the one and only great Judge Judy....bare with me

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.sorry about that, right where was i? Oh year, joysticks, i think.

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6 minutes ago, Mark One said:

Hes still learning the lingo, bless him.  But his workers are hypo efficient.  As soon as you order, Harry claps his hands and orders his staff around with a nasty voice.

How much does he pay his staff and are there any vacancies? I like the uniforms and there seems to be plenty of work, may even get a saveloy for free at break time.

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Hold up a minute! Thats not Harry Hung, thats Vlad the Mighty. Whats going on here, i am not working for him, he is a tyrant! 

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33 minutes ago, freetoroam said:

How much does he pay his staff and are there any vacancies? I like the uniforms and there seems to be plenty of work, may even get a saveloy for free at break time.

Um, its a family affair I`m afraid.  To quote Harry, "No Stwain-jers allowed!"

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16 minutes ago, freetoroam said:

Hold up a minute! Thats not Harry Hung, thats Vlad the Mighty. Whats going on here, i am not working for him, he is a tyrant! 

Nah your gettin yer wires crossed.  Mr Vlad would never be seen in this pub babes.  Its simply not his bag.

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39 minutes ago, freetoroam said:

What are you doing! This is not a place of prayer and god things. If i can not have the one and only great Judge Judy....bare with me

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.sorry about that, right where was i? Oh year, joysticks, i think.

Look chicken, heres a whiskey and coke on the house - Mr Moons payin.  Take it and forget about the dragon in the priest outfit!

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2 minutes ago, Mark One said:

Look chicken, heres a whiskey and coke on the house - Mr Moons payin.  Take it and forget about the dragon in the priest outfit!

Say thankyou to Mr Moon for me for the 6 whiskey and cokes,  he is a good lad. 

8 w&c's and i may forget about the dragon bit. ;)

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Of course I’m paying, well my buddy Vadar is with his lightbright ATM glued to his asmatic weezomatic chest.

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10 hours ago, newbloodmoon said:

Of course I’m paying, well my buddy Vadar is with his lightbright ATM glued to his asmatic weezomatic chest.

That mask wearing bod like - his he a Park Drive chain smoker?  That desperate breathing sounds like hes on 3 packs a day.  Oh, and tell him to keep well away from telephone boxes!  With that racket coming out of his breathing vent he`ll be lucky if he doesnt get his collar felt onnit.

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Rate then!  Listen up suppers, cos thees got an announcement ter mek like onnit.  Come May the swimming pool will be hoppen ter public innit.  50p per half hour, dress properley too, and ah dunt wanna see anythin floating onnit that shouldnt be int watter.

Now the average bod only has a bath once aweek.  Its in summit made of tin that roughly shapes thah birthday suit onnit.  So I`m to employ poolside psychiatrist (quite impressed that I spelt that correctly on my fist attempt) to prevent bods from having mental breakdowns when their senses try to grasp the expanse of my pool. 

Who loves ya baby, and dont forget to tell all of your useless friends that only the George & Dragon offers clean food and honest beer at cracking prices.  Now shove off or order a drink!

 

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I frog marched three youths out of my pub earlier today.  All three of em had white t-shirts on with pictures of two blokes who looked like them pop-music bods.  When one of them asked me if I any Wham on my music box I told em sharp, "Its not turned on until 6pm whipper snappers!"  They then ordered some beers and then began singing some cods wallop along the lines of, "Wham...bam...I am a man..."  The red mist took over and they were soon booted outside with a warning that I`ll wham em around their bonces if I catch em here again!  Flipping yung-uns these days, I dont know....

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On ‎15‎/‎04‎/‎2018 at 2:09 PM, Mark One said:

Rate then!  Listen up suppers, cos thees got an announcement ter mek like onnit.  Come May the swimming pool will be hoppen ter public innit.  50p per half hour, dress properley too, and ah dunt wanna see anythin floating onnit that shouldnt be int watter.

Now the average bod only has a bath once aweek.  Its in summit made of tin that roughly shapes thah birthday suit onnit.  So I`m to employ poolside psychiatrist (quite impressed that I spelt that correctly on my fist attempt) to prevent bods from having mental breakdowns when their senses try to grasp the expanse of my pool. 

Who loves ya baby, and dont forget to tell all of your useless friends that only the George & Dragon offers clean food and honest beer at cracking prices.  Now shove off or order a drink!

 

This is good news indeed :clap:. When you say 'dress properley' you don't mean 'no speedoes', do you? Because I've been really looking forward to seeing Dark Derek in a jet black pair! :w00t: And that funny little hedgehog that comes in here sometimes ....... picture him in doll-sized speedoes! :lol:

I am so glad that the G. & D. exists in a non-p.c. era because ...... I have to ask ........ will you be letting the canal boat crowd in? They're not like us you know, bathing regularly once a week, I doubt whether their a***s get dipped in clean water as often as once a month! So, my worry is that they will treat the pool as a bath and flock to it from miles around. :o

On a more cheerful note: will there be a Grand Opening Ceremony with free food/drinks for regulars? And will regulars get first dibs in the pool while it's still reasonably clean?  

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1 minute ago, ouija ouija said:

This is good news indeed :clap:. When you say 'dress properley' you don't mean 'no speedoes', do you? Because I've been really looking forward to seeing Dark Derek in a jet black pair! :w00t: And that funny little hedgehog that comes in here sometimes ....... picture him in doll-sized speedoes! :lol:

I am so glad that the G. & D. exists in a non-p.c. era because ...... I have to ask ........ will you be letting the canal boat crowd in? They're not like us you know, bathing regularly once a week, I doubt whether their a***s get dipped in clean water as often as once a month! So, my worry is that they will treat the pool as a bath and flock to it from miles around. :o

On a more cheerful note: will there be a Grand Opening Ceremony with free food/drinks for regulars? And will regulars get first dibs in the pool while it's still reasonably clean?  

That hoglet is always losing his trousers so....

Erm, yes.  I`m formulating something along the lines of a narrow boat in the near future.  Not happy about the canal crowd but if they spend their peneth in my drum then who knows?

Um...that depends on the weather luv.

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Now I just been on the blower to Nick China at the riverside pub called the Arabian Desert and hes suggested that I have a sheep dip installed not far from my pool.  Anybod who frequents those canals can then cleanse themselves and de-lice at the same time, prior to having a dip in me pool.

Its just a real shame that me pub wasnt situated down Slingers Lane.  The old ducking pools still there where they used to drowned meddling mystics.  So, after having a few words with a mate of Sticky Micks Ive been given a quote which may mean an increase in me prices bods.  

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Comes in with neon pink speedo, snorkel, goggles, ducky floaty tube, flippers, and sun screen..... notice I never said I was wearing any of it but if there’s a dress code I guess I can slip em on.

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4 hours ago, newbloodmoon said:

Comes in with neon pink speedo, snorkel, goggles, ducky floaty tube, flippers, and sun screen..... notice I never said I was wearing any of it but if there’s a dress code I guess I can slip em on.

Oh bugga whe're gonna clash

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5 hours ago, newbloodmoon said:

Comes in with neon pink speedo, snorkel, goggles, ducky floaty tube, flippers, and sun screen..... notice I never said I was wearing any of it but if there’s a dress code I guess I can slip em on.

OUT!  Dress proper and get yer flamin hair cut!

1 hour ago, Matt221 said:

Oh bugga whe're gonna clash

OUT! The G&D is not the home for Dandies such as yer sen youth!

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Good news bods and bod-ettes. 

This Saturday Nights `Special` is one that I`m actually looking forward too for a change.  Two up and coming leading local ladies have agreed to do a - The Smiths - night.  Yes, thats right your lucky bods, two birds with grade A singing tongues are to sing some of the Smiths greatest hits.  Miriam Plum and Dierdre Stacker will sure liven up the recent sombre tone of Saturday evenings here at the G&D.

I`m also glad to say that the - Who can hold their breath the longest  & How many boiled eggs can you eat in a minute competitions are back.  Some of you may win 6 tins of baked beans or even a signed copy of a book entitled, The Readers Digest book of Fables, by Barry Spent.  There is also a raffle (20p per ticket) to win a share in a Lamb.

    

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10 hours ago, Mark One said:

OUT!  Dress proper and get yer flamin hair cut.

Well I am from the ministry of silly outfits, my card is around here somewh.... oh here it is, had it in the banana hammock.

Edited by newbloodmoon
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