Jump to content
Join the Unexplained Mysteries community today! It's free and setting up an account only takes a moment.
- Sign In or Create Account -

The George And The Dragon is now open.


Mark One

Recommended Posts

3 minutes ago, Mark One said:

Whats all this moaning all about chicken?  You, Ouija and TC must be interested as you keep coming back.  So put yer glad rags on and treat tonight like ladies night in the Lantern. :P

We keep coming back because we are hoping you will bring in some hunky men. 

I have a problem...i googled hunky men and some are not interested in women.

 i will leave it to you to come up with a more eye candy selection, tip: nothing like the ones you have lined up so far.

 

  • Haha 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

6 minutes ago, freetoroam said:

We keep coming back because we are hoping you will bring in some hunky men. 

I have a problem...i googled hunky men and some are not interested in women.

 i will leave it to you to come up with a more eye candy selection, tip: nothing like the ones you have lined up so far.

 

Lets just get this "straight" - you would like me to start displaying images of hot men here :o  What would the neighbors say?

  • Like 2
  • Haha 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

50 minutes ago, Mark One said:

Lets just get this "straight" - you would like me to start displaying images of hot men here :o  What would the neighbors say?

The neighbours are not invited. 

  • Haha 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Am I too late for a pint of Bailey's? *takes a deep breath* Okay, so I've just been on my first date with Dark Derek and everything was going well(he's quite interesting to talk to, actually), until he attempted a kiss on my front doorstep(attempted  to kiss me, not the doorstep! :rolleyes:). The pic below is taken from cctv.

 

Image result for vampire

  • Like 2
  • Sad 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

15 minutes ago, ouija ouija said:

Am I too late for a pint of Bailey's? *takes a deep breath* Okay, so I've just been on my first date with Dark Derek and everything was going well(he's quite interesting to talk to, actually), until he attempted a kiss on my front doorstep(attempted  to kiss me, not the doorstep! :rolleyes:). The pic below is taken from cctv.

 

Image result for vampire

Hes yawning!  Jeez Ouija, did you nearly bore him to death?  And you going out on a date in bedroom garb!!!  Not to mention you look like youve been on the cider - tut-tut.  Uber HD CCTV pointing towards your doorstep....paranoid or what!  And finally, the flash from that camera could have damaged his sensitive skin - poor bloke. :angry:

  • Like 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

10 hours ago, Mark One said:

 

giphy.gif

At least derek is rocken that dance move I taught ‘im and he finally used braces to fix that snaggle tooth grin of his. Itks so nice to see he is getting out and about.

Edited by newbloodmoon
  • Like 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

17 hours ago, Mark One said:

Whats all this moaning all about chicken?  You, Ouija and TC must be interested as you keep coming back.  So put yer glad rags on and treat tonight like ladies night in the Lantern. :P

I keep coming back for the drinks and to see the blokes try to stay on the bar stools after quite a few rounds.  ;) 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

17 hours ago, ouija ouija said:

Am I too late for a pint of Bailey's? *takes a deep breath* Okay, so I've just been on my first date with Dark Derek and everything was going well(he's quite interesting to talk to, actually), until he attempted a kiss on my front doorstep(attempted  to kiss me, not the doorstep! :rolleyes:). The pic below is taken from cctv.

 

Image result for vampire

You look like you are sleeping, he might just have been trying to wake you up.

  • Like 1
  • Haha 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

*displays his private collection of felt gloves*

Ouija, if your neck or shoulders need a massage after your contact with D.D. please let me know. X

  • Like 1
  • Thanks 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Ive ordered 2 of these to add that extra touch to my bar grub.

gravy_fountain.jpg

  • Like 1
  • Haha 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Will definitely stay away from that John Lewis bloke, perhaps I should hang out with we lil Chaz “the knee whacker” Mahoney. He’s not afraid to tell some punter off with his minnie fish wacken bat that he named Janice.

  • Like 2
  • Haha 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 6/10/2018 at 3:37 PM, newbloodmoon said:

Will definitely stay away from that John Lewis bloke, perhaps I should hang out with we lil Chaz “the knee whacker” Mahoney. He’s not afraid to tell some punter off with his minnie fish wacken bat that he named Janice.

Isnt he the one who looks like a one-legged Wayne Rooney?

  • Like 1
  • Haha 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

8 hours ago, Mark One said:

Isnt he the one who looks like a one-legged Wayne Rooney?

I would lean more towards a bald Wayne Newton with a monobrow, but he very well could have a prosthetic leg and I was simply unaware of the one leg.

  • Like 2
  • Haha 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Well Ive waited all day for me friggin Gravy troughs to arrive and...no luck :( Yer wud have fort with 5 quid P&P it would be next day delivery.  I did receive a message though about my order.  A carrier pigeon called Eric flew in earlier all the way from Hull.  It read: PACKAGE IS EMPTY BUT WILL BE PACKED WITH ORDER PRONTO.  PLEASE GIVE ERIC A DRINK OF BOVRIL AND A CHEESE BUTTY.

Dick Ball was in at the time & his pigeon fancying days are still, sadly with us.  He spent a good half hour stroking it whilst trying to give it a kiss. *yuck*

  • Confused 1
  • Sad 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

So who’s the bloke with the hurdy gurdy and tin cup out front? He wanted a few pounds so I pointed him down the street to play at the Moose Knuckle and Cheese Wheel tavern. Hope he wasn’t your entertainment for the night guv, if so I can call the ladies auxillery to come pay a visit, I hear it’s “pastie application” night.

  • Haha 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

A small sweet sherry, if you please, Mark. I hope those gravy fountains arrive soon ...... what a brilliant idea for those of us who are trying to keep their diet sugar free! :w00t:

Hmm, having thought a bit more about it, won't every Tom, Dick and Dark Derek be sticking his grubby fingers in it, slurping the gravy off them and then going back for more? YUCK! 

  • Like 2
  • Haha 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

28 minutes ago, ouija ouija said:

Hmm, having thought a bit more about it, won't every Tom, Dick and Dark Derek be sticking his grubby fingers in it, slurping the gravy off them and then going back for more? YUCK!

Thats the magic see cos every bod uses a stick instead of there grubby mits.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Ive just had to kick the stool from under some yung upstart.  Walking into my gaff with a bunch of flowers, the flippin cheek of it.  Sure its Friday and yes thats the day when many beginners of the art known as - trapping - seek out a ball and chain...but come on, flowers!  They`ll play up my hayfever like summit cronic.  Luckily, Blowtorch Burt and Micky Gravel were around.  The flowers were quickly ycremated and the yung-un was taken around the back where he had a long talk about being cheeky, with Micky.  He was then taken to the dis-coloured pool and thrown in for good measure.  When the bird arrived the tears soon followed and we all told her he wasnt worth it.  She was sent packing back to her mothers and the yung-un came back in-ter Dragon where he bought everyone a drink.  Gawd lad!

  • Haha 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I got a plant from Cement boot Sam once, i think it was called belladonna, due to no room to keep it, i gave it to my mother in law...that reminds me, not even a thankyou off her! 

  • Haha 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 09/06/2018 at 9:16 PM, Mark One said:

Ive ordered 2 of these to add that extra touch to my bar grub.

gravy_fountain.jpg

Whats happening with the gravy fountain? I got 45 marrowfat peas on cocktails sticks here, not sure how long they will last, its been nearly a week now.

  • Like 2
  • Haha 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 6/15/2018 at 2:53 PM, freetoroam said:

Whats happening with the gravy fountain? I got 45 marrowfat peas on cocktails sticks here, not sure how long they will last, its been nearly a week now.

Another pigeon arrived today informing me that it was on its way, and I`m keeping hold of that one.  When the friggin things arrive, Gerald the pigeon here is going to get the first taste!

  • Sad 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

2 minutes ago, Mark One said:

Another pigeon arrived today informing me that it was on its way, and I`m keeping hold of that one.  When the friggin things arrive, Gerald the pigeon here is going to get the first taste!

Are you holding Gerald the pigeon as hostage? Oh dear, please take care of him and do not use duck tape ( as he is a pigeon not a duck).

I look forward to the arrival of friggin thing, may even splash out on a few more marrowpeas.

  • Like 2
  • Haha 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 6/15/2018 at 3:32 PM, freetoroam said:

Are you holding Gerald the pigeon as hostage? Oh dear, please take care of him and do not use duck tape ( as he is a pigeon not a duck).

I look forward to the arrival of friggin thing, may even splash out on a few more marrowpeas.

Oh we have ducks too.  Theyve set up camp in the pool.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Licks chops at the thought of pidgeon giblits in gravy.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

images?q=tbn:ANd9GcSwjnZr9WuLp90rrk02-1e

Ive nicked borrowed a 17" colour telly for Mondays world cup game. 

images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTCCJGnYA3btoPUQPvLevi

There will be a sheep BBQ, men-in-shorts darts matches, buy one get one free, pea-nuts and mini sauages and pineapple cubes, yorkshire puds, meat slices, me two gravy boats (woo-hoo). 

images?q=tbn:ANd9GcSGjgAOKUl_7Ootgq_fUuA

Games at half time for the nippers such as: Ugliest baby compo, brick n spoon race, Biffo the hard-up Clown, a trampoline and balloons and pass the prezzie and blind mans buff onnit.

jane-birkin-and-serge-gainsbourg-in-the-

10p off all benny & hedgehog fags, 15p off of KP crisps.

I thought I`d really go for it this time around seeing as England are generally useless and will no doubt only last a couple of games....*yawn*

 

  • Like 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.