Mark One Posted March 7, 2019 Author #1726 Share Posted March 7, 2019 Gawd lad! Here Mr Moon, some relative of yours called in earlier. Summit about you being behind on your payments on a catalogue order? Ahh must say that she is the double of the British Artist called Grayson Perry! That 60 quid can go towards the dining room fund. Keep up the good work and oh, my bath needs a good scrub when you've got a minute. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
newbloodmoon Posted March 11, 2019 #1727 Share Posted March 11, 2019 Since Tony Blair owed me a solid he will clean the tub in a rainbow maids dress. There will be a 10 quid a minute gawkers fee that will go to charity. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark One Posted March 11, 2019 Author #1728 Share Posted March 11, 2019 Freddy the fishfinger Cobb will be delivering the coal this week. So the coal house needs a sweep out. Oh and it looks like one of our punters has brought with him his infestation of earwigs & silverfish. The snug near the fireplace is overun with the little critters. Colin Crabby, the meter-man is due any day to check the gas and Lecky. So have be ready fah him coming and get that bucket of spiders from under the sink int kitchen onnit. He hates em and will not go near a meter which is overun with em. Not too happy though about that current fashion craze of yours. Seems like it's starting to spread like a rash throughout Weevleton. And you're'starting to look freakish now you've stopped shaving, Bob. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
newbloodmoon Posted March 13, 2019 #1729 Share Posted March 13, 2019 Kicks feet up and knocks down a pint after getting the honey-do lists done. Those earwigs sure were a nasty bunch with their pinchy butts. Reminds me of merve the perve who always talked about his pinchy butt. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark One Posted March 13, 2019 Author #1730 Share Posted March 13, 2019 11 hours ago, newbloodmoon said: Those earwigs sure were a nasty bunch with their pinchy butts. Reminds me of merve the perve who always talked about his pinchy butt. True, but they gave the pub some spirit which inturn provided the regular slurpers un burpers with summit Ter rabbit on about. (Chatter/going on and on about something) Ooh! If Yee ever spot any grubs ont floor or int kitchen - save em. Smelly Malcolm will buy em off us for his fishing hobby. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
newbloodmoon Posted March 21, 2019 #1731 Share Posted March 21, 2019 Makes monetary exchange with smelly Malcolm, the G&D gave him some grade A grub and he handed over the money. He also asked if we could premier his “Double Skunk Ale”. I told him to drop off a few free cases and we can see if it’s up to the refined pallets of this motley clientale. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark One Posted March 25, 2019 Author #1732 Share Posted March 25, 2019 Av bwin ont rum all day, yonnit. *Burp* Twas me boff-dee (birthday) ont fer, fer...13th an did only day me get Ter Slurper it up, binnit. *strange Trumpet noise* That ale swounds sweet, uppit. Yer got that bar, lass...lad...um. Nippon Ter wet me wistle. *Falls into door* 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tcgram Posted March 27, 2019 #1733 Share Posted March 27, 2019 On 3/25/2019 at 12:24 PM, Mark One said: Av bwin ont rum all day, yonnit. *Burp* Twas me boff-dee (birthday) ont fer, fer...13th an did only day me get Ter Slurper it up, binnit. *strange Trumpet noise* That ale swounds sweet, uppit. Yer got that bar, lass...lad...um. Nippon Ter wet me wistle. *Falls into door* Sorry I missed your birthday, young man. Hope it was great. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
newbloodmoon Posted March 30, 2019 #1734 Share Posted March 30, 2019 On 3/25/2019 at 9:24 AM, Mark One said: Av bwin ont rum all day, yonnit. *Burp* Twas me boff-dee (birthday) ont fer, fer...13th an did only day me get Ter Slurper it up, binnit. *strange Trumpet noise* That ale swounds sweet, uppit. Yer got that bar, lass...lad...um. Nippon Ter wet me wistle. *Falls into door* Dont worry we took down the pin the brazzier on the super models wobbly bits poster down. From what I saw she must have been a super model in the 40’s cause everyone kept putting it on her knees. Could have been the drink as well, anyway happy hangover day. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vlawde Posted April 2, 2019 #1735 Share Posted April 2, 2019 On 1/23/2019 at 1:00 PM, Mark One said: Hiya Vlawde, how yer doing? Here, try a bowl of cornbeef hash. It's only 60p per bowl. Salt, chum? Here let me do the honours. *Leans over Vlawde with salt and catches a strange wiff coming from the stew* Here you go sir (sprinkles some salt and starts to sing a song) "...Do the Shake & Vac, and bring the freshness back. Do the Shake & ..." Thanks./ Food is good, but service is slow, it's been 3 years! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark One Posted April 2, 2019 Author #1736 Share Posted April 2, 2019 1 hour ago, Vlawde said: Thanks./ Food is good, but service is slow, it's been 3 years! No worries, John. After all, this pub is in a kind of time warp anyway. 48 weeks back the Dragon was anchored somewhere between the 60s and 70s and is currently in the 80s with Wham, wacko jacko and Ronny Raygun int Whitehouse onnim. *Gets a bit heated under marks collar* And them fluppin soap operas like Emerdale Farm are on ONCE per week. Not every bleeding night like they will be by 2010ad! NOW THEN JOHN, WHATS YER POISON?...GRRRRRRR 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vlawde Posted April 2, 2019 #1737 Share Posted April 2, 2019 Shepherd's Pie and your strongest ale. I have an appointment coming up in 2020 so hurry it up! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark One Posted April 2, 2019 Author #1738 Share Posted April 2, 2019 8 minutes ago, Vlawde said: Shepherd's Pie and your strongest ale. I have an appointment coming up in 2020 so hurry it up! I dunno...flipping timetravellors....have all of the time in the world and they're still impatient. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark One Posted April 3, 2019 Author #1739 Share Posted April 3, 2019 Tomorrow, I'm having me boat race painted by Weevletons one and only artist - Kevin Tapp. The said painting will then be mailed up over the fireplace. You lucky people! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rashore Posted April 3, 2019 #1740 Share Posted April 3, 2019 Sorry I haven't been around much my dear man... Been rather distracted lately. But if you would ever be a dear, mind mixing me a Godfather on ice with an orange twist while your most recent shipment is unloaded? We got in Some rather standard cargo carriers this time, no animal oddities at all... 2 gross cheap imported beer, full kegs 2 dozen skids fine crafted beer kegs 4 bottles of vintage bubbly, 3 of a nice white wine, 3 of a table red, and one each of a sherry and a cognac- marked "private quarters case" The new lines and carbonation system set up for the soda setup. I've already told the back of the house to be nice to the strange short gentlemen setting it up and living in the emptying storage crates in the trucks. Apparently this is the thing. The workers have told me you might want to shut down the pub to patrons for a few hours on Monday afternoon while they recharge the system. And another truck full of various foods that I'm not even sure about.. and the sundries wagon. Table 3 needs another round of darts, the new waiter is being overly attentive to it's nest outside in the rafters... and frankly my dear, the whole of the floor rushes needs a good sweeping out. Whatever has this place not been up to while I've been snowbirding away this winter? 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark One Posted April 4, 2019 Author #1741 Share Posted April 4, 2019 As always, my little Spring flower, I cannot thank you enough. If newbloodmoon appears a tad odd to you, that's a long story about desperate women chasing him & a Cunning disquise to repell them. Ouija ouija went to the ladies washroom last July and has never been seen again. I'm knocking down the outdoor loos to build an extension which shall become a dining area. The drains out there pen and ink but fingers crossed - they'll die down. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
purrrpetrator Posted April 4, 2019 #1742 Share Posted April 4, 2019 Beg pardon, but I'm pretty sure that 3-hole button is mine... missing it... not sure how it found its way into the tip jar! Extraordinarily unlikely it just hopped in there by itself! And belly-button lint (mine, anyway) has no hop at all, so yous can keep that... speaking of hops, another IPA please, at your leisure, and a round for the house! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark One Posted April 5, 2019 Author #1743 Share Posted April 5, 2019 You crafty cheap skate! That's a drink for you, me and nobody else. We're the only two here. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
purrrpetrator Posted April 5, 2019 #1744 Share Posted April 5, 2019 i knew that... what's that smell? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark One Posted April 5, 2019 Author #1745 Share Posted April 5, 2019 Probably Jack McSpats (claimed to be) dead dog? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MWoo7 Posted April 5, 2019 #1746 Share Posted April 5, 2019 (edited) HEy hey ...just needed a toothpick laterzzzz * door swinging away .... ray arcs of sunlight showing sparkles in the settling dust***** misc.: Okay now my post looks okay, how the page refresh doesn't show me recent post OR WHO IS IN THE ROOM is unknown to me, ? I was posting a page or two back , oh well ,, LATERZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ Edited April 5, 2019 by MWoo7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark One Posted April 7, 2019 Author #1747 Share Posted April 7, 2019 On 05/04/2019 at 11:27 PM, MWoo7 said: HEy hey ...just needed a toothpick laterzzzz * door swinging away .... ray arcs of sunlight showing sparkles in the settling dust***** misc.: Okay now my post looks okay, how the page refresh doesn't show me recent post OR WHO IS IN THE ROOM is unknown to me, ? I was posting a page or two back , oh well ,, LATERZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ Aww no, that's such a shame, my little sprinkled princess. Sounds like you had a session in The Lame Cow Inn, just prior to arriving inside my drum (drum & bass= Place). The beer and spirits in that pokey drum are all left overs, luv. You'll only get the freshest slurps n burps in my pub. And we even offer lard fried chicken in a basket too. Who loves yah baby! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MWoo7 Posted April 7, 2019 #1748 Share Posted April 7, 2019 (edited) ahahahaaha LIKES AND LAUGHS , this site should allow multiple smiley laughs plus a LARGER HEART LIKE TOO ! Yeah if you're a real cook[I AM not boo!] well I've worked for some Frenchies and they always like REAL BEEF FAT or just any type of actual lard to work with and I always considered it to be just any old vegetable oil until I worked with them over a Christmas event and now I'm thinking that stuff is just tripe, well esp. now because its cheap as possible crushed soy or such oil. OOOps off on a tangent again just imagine that! gooooooooooo FIGURE ! Laterzzz late for a date ** flies out the door* Edited April 7, 2019 by MWoo7 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
purrrpetrator Posted April 7, 2019 #1749 Share Posted April 7, 2019 (edited) a cold sauerkraut brine martini pls barkeep, and, if you would, your best non-bathtub gin... oh, and hold the vermouth... and if you could, a Rueben sandwich, processed Swiss OK, but gotta-be-free-range-but-cornered corned beef... you heard me... and on caraway rye, too, if possible... would be marvellous... and yes, i'll have that warmed... and if you're making one you might as well make two... and one for yourself! Edited April 7, 2019 by purrrpetrator Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark One Posted April 7, 2019 Author #1750 Share Posted April 7, 2019 *scratches head* We have non of that foreign muck in here, chief. So that's a pint of stout, an hotdog an sum pork scratchings. Didn't mind if I join you, John. Cheers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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