ImmortalSupernaturalAlien Posted March 16, 2016 #1 Share Posted March 16, 2016 The rules are simple. You make a wish, and the poster below you will grant it, but will corrupt it in some way. For example, "I wish for a pony." Poster replies, "Granted! But on the day you get it, it will kick you in the nuts" OR "I wish for a new alarm clock" Poster replies, "Granted! But you can't find the snooze button to turn the alarm off" Got it? Ok! I'll start... I wish I had a billion dollars! 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bubblykiss Posted March 16, 2016 #2 Share Posted March 16, 2016 Granted, you had it, but now it is gone. Did you enjoy it? I wish my cat would sit on my lap right now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RedSquirrel Posted March 16, 2016 #3 Share Posted March 16, 2016 Granted. It has an accident on your lap too. I wish I could sew better. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bubblykiss Posted March 16, 2016 #4 Share Posted March 16, 2016 Granted. It has an accident on your lap too. I wish I could sew better. Granted you go to Vegas and sew a better to his chair, the court finds against you and you are looking at a long haul down a river of ****. I wish I had another coffee. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ImmortalSupernaturalAlien Posted March 16, 2016 Author #5 Share Posted March 16, 2016 (edited) Granted! Turns out you're just drinking watery mud. I wish for a puppy. Edited March 16, 2016 by ImmortalSupernaturalAlien Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bubblykiss Posted March 17, 2016 #6 Share Posted March 17, 2016 Granted, but the puppy gets a job working for an accounting firm the next day and moves out, only calling you when he needs help paying his rent, which is every month. alt: Granted, you wish for a puppy, the puppy is really pleased you made a wish for him but wishes you would have let him make his own wish I wish for land sharks. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RedSquirrel Posted March 17, 2016 #7 Share Posted March 17, 2016 I wish for land sharks. Granted, but they are clown sharks! I wish for a nice banjo. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bubblykiss Posted March 17, 2016 #8 Share Posted March 17, 2016 Granted buy now banjo duels occur daily in your living room I wish for an end of allergy season. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RedSquirrel Posted March 17, 2016 #9 Share Posted March 17, 2016 Granted buy now banjo duels occur daily in your living room I wish for an end of allergy season. Granted. It's now cold/flu season.I wish for a key lime pie. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bubblykiss Posted March 17, 2016 #10 Share Posted March 17, 2016 Granted, the pie is made of nothing but lime-shaped keys. I wish for a new vampire movie. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RedSquirrel Posted March 17, 2016 #11 Share Posted March 17, 2016 Granted, the pie is made of nothing but lime-shaped keys. I wish for a new vampire movie. Granted, it's a remake of twilight staring -only- Kanye West.I wish to be less angry (not at you, in general). 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tcgram Posted March 17, 2016 #12 Share Posted March 17, 2016 Granted, it's a remake of twilight staring -only- Kanye West. I wish to be less angry (not at you, in general). Granted, but now you laugh at inappropriate moments. I wish I could have a soft drink. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RedSquirrel Posted March 17, 2016 #13 Share Posted March 17, 2016 Granted, but now you laugh at inappropriate moments. I wish I could have a soft drink. Hehehahahahahah.... hold on... I'm good... Bwahahahahahah!Granted, it's a cup full of feathers. I wish for one dollar. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ImmortalSupernaturalAlien Posted March 17, 2016 Author #14 Share Posted March 17, 2016 Granted! Too bad it flew away. I wish for an ice cream cone! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark One Posted March 17, 2016 #15 Share Posted March 17, 2016 (edited) One cone that makes you scream like a banshee is now yours I wish I could manipulate time. Edited March 17, 2016 by Mark One 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BiffSplitkins Posted March 17, 2016 #16 Share Posted March 17, 2016 I wish I could manipulate time. You can, but with all the abrupt time variations it throws your entire digestive system out of sync and you soil yourself every time you use the power. I wish I could fly like Superman. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Keel M. Posted March 17, 2016 #17 Share Posted March 17, 2016 I wish I could fly like Superman. You can, but you've never learned to keep your mouth shut while flying, so all manner of bugs and other debris flies into your mouth. I wish I could live in a treehouse. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BiffSplitkins Posted March 17, 2016 #18 Share Posted March 17, 2016 I wish I could live in a treehouse. You finally close a deal on a fairly nice treehouse and failed to read the fine print that requires you to live there with a large family of Ewoks that eat nothing but Mexican food and have chronic bad flatulance. I wish I had a maintenance free car that is always full of fuel. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bubblykiss Posted March 18, 2016 #19 Share Posted March 18, 2016 (edited) You finally close a deal on a fairly nice treehouse and failed to read the fine print that requires you to live there with a large family of Ewoks that eat nothing but Mexican food and have chronic bad flatulance. I wish I had a maintenance free car that is always full of fuel. Granted, you now own a hot-wheels Scooby Doo mystery wagon toy car. I wish for a new aquarium. Edited March 18, 2016 by bubblykiss 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GlitterRose Posted March 18, 2016 #20 Share Posted March 18, 2016 Granted, you now own a hot-wheels Scooby Doo mystery wagon toy car. I wish for a new aquarium. Granted, but someone comes along and thinks the fish are too cold. They turn up the temp and cook all your expensive tropical fish. I'm too jaded to wish for anything. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hugh Posted March 18, 2016 #21 Share Posted March 18, 2016 I'm too jaded to wish for anything. Granted! ... wait, you didn't wish for anything lol... I wish I had control over the weather. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tcgram Posted March 18, 2016 #22 Share Posted March 18, 2016 Granted, but now you are worse than the weather person because you can't make up your mind what weather you want. I wish I could turn back time. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BiffSplitkins Posted March 18, 2016 #23 Share Posted March 18, 2016 I wish I could turn back time. *Poof" Time is turned back. Now Cher follows you everywhere 24/7 in her skimpy little outfit singing that song over and over and over right in your ear... even while you try to sleep. I wish I were an astronaut. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bubblykiss Posted March 18, 2016 #24 Share Posted March 18, 2016 Granted you are now the head astronaut of the nation of Tauren, unfortunately they have completely defunded all their program and you are unable to draw a salary. I wish it was dinner time, I am hungry for a Swedish smorgasbord 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BiffSplitkins Posted March 18, 2016 #25 Share Posted March 18, 2016 You get your wish but Bork, bork... bork bork bork bork.... bork... BORK BORK!!!! I wish my cat would let me sleep at least one full night a week. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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