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Please HELP, psychic ability ruining my life


M.o.m22

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Ever since I was little I knew I had psychic abilities. If I concentrate hard enough I can make people blink and look at me. I can grow my nails at will. Cats talk to me and ask me for help, but I don't speak spanish. My powers have taken a toll on my body. I now blink non stop. My eyes have been worked out so much i can do push ups with my eyelids. The sun make my hair fall out and I can no longer smell cheese? Why????? I can no longer hear out of my left nose. Does anyone have any tips?  

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4 minutes ago, M.o.m22 said:

Ever since I was little I knew I had psychic abilities. If I concentrate hard enough I can make people blink and look at me. I can grow my nails at will. Cats talk to me and ask me for help, but I don't speak spanish. My powers have taken a toll on my body. I now blink non stop. My eyes have been worked out so much i can do push ups with my eyelids. The sun make my hair fall out and I can no longer smell cheese? Why????? I can no longer hear out of my left nose. Does anyone have any tips?  

I would say, (off the top, of course, as you need a psychiatrist if half of what you say is true) that your delusions are making you sick.  Delusions can do that -- they use to scare me until I learned it's all in my head.

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4 minutes ago, Frank Merton said:

I would say, (off the top, of course, as you need a psychiatrist if half of what you say is true) that your delusions are making you sick.  Delusions can do that -- they use to scare me until I learned it's all in my head.

Im not sick, i get flu shots every week. You're delusional. I have powers

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5 minutes ago, M.o.m22 said:

Im not sick, i get flu shots every week. You're delusional. I have powers

There are clues in your message that indicate otherwise, or that you are being less than serious (you can "no longer hear out of your left nose").

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Don't feel bad I can't hear out of my left or right nostril . ( nose ) Good luck with that , Maybe you should see a Neurologist if youre experiencing all that . 

Edited by Darkenpath25
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5 hours ago, M.o.m22 said:

... I can no longer hear out of my left nose. Does anyone have any tips?  

q-tips?

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My nails also grow continuously.

My dog communicates with cats, I'm not sure of the language, I think it is dog.

I hear nothing with my nose.

When I stare at people I can make them feel uncomfortable.

My god, we have so much in common!

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I am struggling to believe this is a genuine thread....  :o  :rolleyes:  :whistle:

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8 hours ago, M.o.m22 said:

Ever since I was little I knew I had psychic abilities. If I concentrate hard enough I can make people blink and look at me. I can grow my nails at will. Cats talk to me and ask me for help, but I don't speak spanish. My powers have taken a toll on my body. I now blink non stop. My eyes have been worked out so much i can do push ups with my eyelids. The sun make my hair fall out and I can no longer smell cheese? Why????? I can no longer hear out of my left nose. Does anyone have any tips?  

Thankyou thankyou thankyou.

That is one of the funniest things I have ever read!

:nw:

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17 hours ago, Frank Merton said:

There are clues in your message that indicate otherwise, or that you are being less than serious (you can "no longer hear out of your left nose").

Hey man I'm fine. I just want the cats to stop talking to me or at least speak english, and I want hear out of my nose again. I don't think that's too much to ask for. I can still see from my ears and smell from my eyes, so that's good. And maybe a blue fish shouldn't be giving advice. Just saying. And if someone doesn't eat the pigeon I will

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11 hours ago, Golden Duck said:

q-tips?

That's dangerous. I tried a toilet brush, but it just irritated it. I may have to remove it completely, but then my moustache would look weird. I can't shave it either or the elves will eat my children and burn all my socks. I don't know what to do, I really need those socks

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