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pallidin

Man robs churches to 'get back at God'

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Hammerclaw
4 minutes ago, I'mConvinced said:

Perhaps you should have used the correct words to describe what you meant, instead of making a sweeping statement and then correcting yourself.

I also stated I was not referring to the original crime. 

So you wanted change the subject? I've been on topic pretty much, except for your little excursions into your difficulty making real friends.

Edited by Hammerclaw

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Sherapy
24 minutes ago, I'mConvinced said:

You see it's this level of assumption that's the problem.

I've been friends with this guy for 30 years, I understand him, his life, his problems. 12 years ago he saved my life. 

His house was being repossessed because his wife, a greedy b****, had been taking his paycheck but keeping the money instead of paying the bank. When he found out about this she left him and the kids. 

So he asked for help and I gave what I could afford at the time. It wasn't enough and so he made the decision to pay some to the bank and try to turn a profit on the rest by purchasing equipment to grow some weed. An error of judgement but he felt he had nowhere else to turn.

He lost his house anyway, his neighbour turned him in as he hadn't understood how smelly that stuff can be. When he lost his car as well he could no longer do his job and was fired. The bank sold his house in an auction for £40,000 less than the market value. Including the money already owed, the debt on his car and the fines from court he was bankrupted with total debts nearing £76,000.

He is currently a broken single parent to 3 kids struggling day by day just to feed and clothe everyone. One day, if he can get back on his feet he will pay me back without me asking. Until then I have removed all guilt from him regarding the money and preserved an important relationship by simply forgiving his mistake. This is what real friends do.

I wouldn't expect you to understand but it makes me wonder what kind of friendships you have that would be discarded so easily over 'theft'.

In your black and white world he is deserving of no respect but in mine he continues to be a valuable part of many people's lives. Perspective is a funny thing right?

You are empathetic and compassionate, to know yourself this way is your reward, no matter what your friend did in desperation. 

 

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I'mConvinced
2 minutes ago, Sherapy said:

You are empathetic and compassionate, to know yourself this way is your reward, no matter what your friend did in desperation. 

 

Thanks. I feel one of the biggest problems this world faces is attitudes such as Hammer's. Rules are rules, black and white, condemn first and think later.

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Hammerclaw
4 minutes ago, I'mConvinced said:

Upon what information are you making this comparison? My friend hasn't sucked anyone dry, in fact he saved my life.

I stand by what I say. Your bitterness is apparent, only the source remains hidden.

Oh, I'm not bitter, honey, it's just my way of dealing with smartasses on internet. You know nothing of me, either, yet YOU don't mind making unverified conclusions--so why should I?

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I'mConvinced
5 minutes ago, Hammerclaw said:

So you wanted change the subject? I've been on topic pretty much, except for little excursions into you difficulty making real friends.

I made that pretty obvious when I addressed your post. If you didn't want to stray perhaps you should have mentioned that. Straying from OP is pretty much the norm here in my experience.

I smiled when I read the little barb at the end there. If only you had any idea just how wrong you are.

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Hammerclaw
Just now, I'mConvinced said:

I made that pretty obvious when I addressed your post. If you didn't want to stray perhaps you should have mentioned that. Straying from OP is pretty much the norm here in my experience.

I smiled when I read the little barb at the end there. If only you had any idea just how wrong you are.

I don't care. You shouldn't air your personal laundry in public if you don't want to be judged for it.

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Sherapy
1 hour ago, I'mConvinced said:

Thanks. I feel one of the biggest problems this world faces is attitudes such as Hammer's. Rules are rules, black and white, condemn first and think later.

Hammer can come off hardened, and brutally harsh it is something he is working on. 

 

I see his side too, there are horrible humans amoungst us ( your friend excluded) who need firm boundaries or they will leech you dry. I think your point is each case is different, and knowing the difference is key and it is well taken, by me anyway.

Edited by Sherapy
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I'mConvinced
2 minutes ago, Hammerclaw said:

Oh, I'm not bitter, honey, it's just my way of dealing with smartasses on internet. You know nothing of me, either, yet YOU don't mind making unverified conclusions--so why should I?

*Shrug* You come across as bitter to me and I stand by that assertion. 

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Sherapy
1 minute ago, Hammerclaw said:

I don't care. You shouldn't air your personal laundry in public if you don't want to be judged for it.

Okay, now you are just being mean. 

Take a breather. 

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Sherapy
Just now, I'mConvinced said:

*Shrug* You come across as bitter to me and I stand by that assertion. 

He can be bitter, he says this himself. 

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I'mConvinced
1 minute ago, Sherapy said:

Hammer can come off hardened, and brutally harsh it is something he is working on. 

 

I see his side too, there are horrible humans amoungst us ( your friend excluded) who need firm boundaries or they will leech you dry. I think your point is each case is different, and knowing the difference is key and it is well taken, by me anyways.  

Spot on. Every situation is unique and while we would like to paint the world with broad strokes it just doesn't work.

Hammer is a pussycat, I've dealt with far worse.

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I'mConvinced
6 minutes ago, Hammerclaw said:

I don't care. You shouldn't air your personal laundry in public if you don't want to be judged for it.

I don't mind being judged or I wouldn't post the things I post. You were just making a terrible comparison and I pointed that out. 

Edited by I'mConvinced
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Sherapy
3 minutes ago, I'mConvinced said:

Spot on. Every situation is unique and while we would like to paint the world with broad strokes it just doesn't work.

Hammer is a pussycat, I've dealt with far worse.

He has an incredibly kind side too. He will come around. 

Edited by Sherapy
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I'mConvinced
3 minutes ago, Sherapy said:

He has an incredibly kind side too. 

I can believe that. I just struggle to understand how someone, who is clearly intelligent and learned, can still hold such rigid views.

I also don't like the 'I don't care what others think' argument. Everyone cares what others think, that's just part of being a social animal.

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Sherapy
20 minutes ago, I'mConvinced said:

I can believe that. I just struggle to understand how someone, who is clearly intelligent and learned, can still hold such rigid views.

I also don't like the 'I don't care what others think' argument. Everyone cares what others think, that's just part of being a social animal.

Me too, I don't use the I don't care what others think counter either. I care because I am social and part of a whole, it matters that we find a way to get along in peace. It doesn't always mean we can be anything more than civil, but at minimum let's shoot for that.

I work with teenagers (as a tutor) and they give me a lot of insight. In particular, saying I don't care means "I am sensitive and have assumed because we disagree you don't like me, so I am not gonna like you first." 

Edited by Sherapy
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Hammerclaw
38 minutes ago, Sherapy said:

Okay, now you are just being mean. 

Take a breather. 

Thank you for your response.

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Hammerclaw
22 minutes ago, I'mConvinced said:

I can believe that. I just struggle to understand how someone, who is clearly intelligent and learned, can still hold such rigid views.

I also don't like the 'I don't care what others think' argument. Everyone cares what others think, that's just part of being a social animal.

It's called playing devil's advocate; I amuse myself by doing it, from time to time. You take an extreme position and deadpan serious responses the entire exchange. Sorry, guess I was having a little to much fun. You should be there when I bleeding heart it. It would bring tears to your eyes

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I'mConvinced
7 minutes ago, Hammerclaw said:

It's called playing devil's advocate; I amuse myself by doing it, from time to time. You take an extreme position and deadpan serious responses the entire exchange. Sorry, guess I was having a little to much fun. You should be there when I bleeding heart it. It would bring tears to your eyes

Damn, I was quite enjoying that. Well you got me and now...the game is afoot!

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Hammerclaw
1 hour ago, I'mConvinced said:

 

Everyone cares what others think, that's just part of being a social animal.

Sometimes, one can become too consumed with what others think about them, instead of what they know about themselves. Best to just be oneself and let the chips fall where they may. One won't make or keep many friends with a lie. It's a wonderful thing to be able to see the good in everyone; not so good when you have to deal with the consequences of the bad in them. When all else fails one must be true to oneself. Dammit, Sheri! You've got me spouting truisms, a-gain. *grumble, grumble."

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Sherapy
20 minutes ago, Hammerclaw said:

Sometimes, one can become too consumed with what others think about them, instead of what they know about themselves. Best to just be oneself and let the chips fall where they may. One won't make or keep many friends with a lie. It's a wonderful thing to be able to see the good in everyone; not so good when you have to deal with the consequences of the bad in them. When all else fails one must be true to oneself. Dammit, Sheri! You've got me spouting truisms, a-gain. *grumble, grumble."

Well good to see you showing your kind side. :) 

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internetperson
3 hours ago, Hammerclaw said:

He died from not taking the medication that kept him alive because he didn't like the way it made him feels, despite his friends pleading with him to. Selfish to the end.

Speaking as someone who has to take medications to prevent seizures I can tell you your attitude is infuriating. Come on and take my meds, see how they make you feel. My damn doctors won't even take them. So infuriating.

Edited by internetperson
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Hammerclaw
16 hours ago, internetperson said:

Speaking as someone who has to take medications to prevent seizures I can tell you your attitude is infuriating. Come on and take my meds, see how they make you feel. My damn doctors won't even take them. So infuriating.

I'm on seven different medications, myself, some nauseating and sexually debilitating--so I have some sympathy for your situation. The person in question was like neither of us. His medications were for drug addictions and made it impossible for him to enjoy them, anymore. He stole from friends, his parents, his wife--who finally divorced him--to support his habits. He stop taking the medicine and died from them. So, you're reading far too much of yourself into it.

Edited by Hammerclaw
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internetperson
2 hours ago, Hammerclaw said:

I'm on seven different medications, myself, some nauseating and sexually debilitating--so I have some sympathy for your situation.

If you're on 7 meds and those are your side effects then you're very lucky.

Either way I'm strongly opinionated on this topic, which seems to be off topic, so we'll just have to agree to disagree I suppose.

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Hammerclaw
1 hour ago, internetperson said:

If you're on 7 meds and those are your side effects then you're very lucky.

Either way I'm strongly opinionated on this topic, which seems to be off topic, so we'll just have to agree to disagree I suppose.

That's your prerogative. I lost a cousin who suffer from severe seizures from epilepsy and was particularly troubled by the medications prescribed. He opted for an untried surgery with no guarantees where they separate the connection between the lobes of the brain. It didn't work, didn't end the seizures and rendered him mentally incapacitated with no control of his bodily functions. My Aunt found him dead in bed, one evening, having vomited in his sleep and aspirating it. No matter how bad we think we've got it, there's always someone worse.

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internetperson
50 minutes ago, Hammerclaw said:

That's your prerogative. I lost a cousin who suffer from severe seizures from epilepsy and was particularly troubled by the medications prescribed. He opted for an untried surgery with no guarantees where they separate the connection between the lobes of the brain. It didn't work, didn't end the seizures and rendered him mentally incapacitated with no control of his bodily functions. My Aunt found him dead in bed, one evening, having vomited in his sleep and aspirating it. No matter how bad we think we've got it, there's always someone worse.

This surgery was suggested to me by a Mayo Clinic doctor. You're proving my point for me, that the med side effects are so bad that you'd opt for such a surgery. Maybe I'm looking from the wrong perspective? I've been to the ER several times, mother stopping my bleeding on my forehead and I looked like Rocky. That ****ed my perspective of life up to put my mother through this. Still you're right there's always someone who has it worse. There are folks in 3rd world countries dealing with this. That being said what's your point? Just stop worrying about it? That's not realistic advice.

I said it in another thread and I'll say it here; I think if we sat down and talked we'd probably realize we're on the same page. The net just makes it a bit different.

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