StarMountainKid Posted June 16, 2018 #76 Share Posted June 16, 2018 there's a story of a Buddhist monastery where one of the students keep stealing from the other students. Finally the student confesses to the Monk that he's been stealing. The student says, I'm such a bad person, I'll be the first in Hell. The Monk says, no I'll be in Hell before you. The student says, but master, your lead a perfect life, why would you go to Hell? The Monk says, if I'm not in Hell when you get there, who will be there to teach you right from wrong? There are many examples of people giving their lives to save others. Sort of the ultimate acts of kindness. This is supposed to be Jesus' sacrifice, dying on the cross somehow for the forgiveness of our sins. I don't quite understand that logic, but that's the general interpretation. I think something dramatic had to happen to emphasize the point of Jesus' ultimate kindness. There's a lot of suffering in the world, and we may feel sympathetic, but of course we go on with our own lives and really do nothing about it. Myself included. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GlitterRose Posted June 16, 2018 #77 Share Posted June 16, 2018 It would be really great if people would remember that. It seems like there's an awful lot of cheering going on about children being torn from their parents at the border. Most of those families are Christian. 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LightAngel Posted June 16, 2018 #78 Share Posted June 16, 2018 12 hours ago, markdohle said: Yes it is. I have learned that I cannot change anyone, that helps when dealing with some persons. Even if it can't be returned, compassion should be shown if possible. peace Mark I agree. We can only inspire each other. And very often people just need you to listen. 8 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LightAngel Posted June 16, 2018 #79 Share Posted June 16, 2018 8 hours ago, Sherapy said: Along the lines of your thoughts, I worked with a woman with a terminal illness, she had taken care of herself for the duration of the illness, her husband and kids abandoned her, she had no recourse but to go on. When I came on board as her live in caregiver she struggled with my kindness towards her, at first she would adamantly refuse need comfort, but once she came to trust me her ability to be vulnerable returned and by the end of her life she was doing quite well with hugs and acts of kindness towards her. She told us a few weeks before she died that she had never known such kindness and that she felt safe and loved, she said my family and I made her last days wonderful. Now, not every case is a success story, but when it is one witnesses the power of kindness, but as you point out one must be open to it. I would agree that when we close ourselves off to kindness we make things harder than they need to be. Yes, true kindness has power. If we can make a person feel loved, and respected then we can inspire each other. The woman in your story remind me of many of the older people I meet when I worked at a nursing home. There are so many lonely people in this world, it's heartbreaking. My coworkers and I did our best to make their last days as good as possible. To be a good listener was often the key to give them a smile on their face 4 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+Sherapy Posted June 16, 2018 #80 Share Posted June 16, 2018 1 hour ago, LightAngel said: Yes, true kindness has power. If we can make a person feel loved, and respected then we can inspire each other. The woman in your story remind me of many of the older people I meet when I worked at a nursing home. There are so many lonely people in this world, it's heartbreaking. My coworkers and I did our best to make their last days as good as possible. To be a good listener was often the key to give them a smile on their face 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Likely Guy Posted June 16, 2018 #81 Share Posted June 16, 2018 1 hour ago, LightAngel said: I agree. We can only inspire each other. And very often people just need you to listen to. I'm not religious in the least, but I like what mark writes. 4 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+Sherapy Posted June 16, 2018 #82 Share Posted June 16, 2018 1 hour ago, LightAngel said: I agree. We can only inspire each other. And very often people just need you to listen. It really is a basic as active listening, In other words, the “professional” training for this is called Validation Therapy. Do you still work in a nursing home? Thank you for your service. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tatetopa Posted June 16, 2018 #83 Share Posted June 16, 2018 On 6/13/2018 at 3:42 PM, markdohle said: The Christian path is not about being nice, but about being kind. Kindness comes from the heart, when it sees, and understands a person, or a situation. Most people are touched by even the smallest kindness, especially if it comes in an unexpected manner. Markdohle, you are a genuinely fine person. We of the human race are fortunate to have you among us. Thanks. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+Sherapy Posted June 16, 2018 #84 Share Posted June 16, 2018 2 hours ago, ChaosRose said: It would be really great if people would remember that. It seems like there's an awful lot of cheering going on about children being torn from their parents at the border. Most of those families are Christian. Rose!!! Great to see you posting girl. You are missed around here. Gosh, it is heart breaking to break up families. I am not be okay with that. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LightAngel Posted June 16, 2018 #85 Share Posted June 16, 2018 4 hours ago, LightAngel said: Yes, true kindness has power. If we can make a person feel loved, and respected then we can inspire each other. The woman in your story remind me of many of the older people I meet when I worked at a nursing home. There are so many lonely people in this world, it's heartbreaking. My coworkers and I did our best to make their last days as good as possible. To be a good listener was often the key to give them a smile on their face 3 hours ago, Sherapy said: Thank you for your kindness Nope, I don't work in a nursing home anymore, I thought that was clear from my post?! It's many years ago I had that job, but I learned a lot from it. I still remember all the faces, and all the conversations I had. It's the toughest job in the world if you ask me, and on so many different levels, but I'm glad of the life experience it gave me. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LightAngel Posted June 16, 2018 #86 Share Posted June 16, 2018 I took the job because I wanted to help people, so I don't complain here. It was just tougher than I thought, but who says everything has to be easy?! 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
markdohle Posted June 16, 2018 Author #87 Share Posted June 16, 2018 Quote TateTopa said: Markdohle, you are a genuinely fine person. We of the human race are fortunate to have you among us. Thanks. Thank you my friend......still a struggle. I guess I will be dead ten minutes before it stops.....but well worth it. peace mark 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+Sherapy Posted June 16, 2018 #88 Share Posted June 16, 2018 3 hours ago, LightAngel said: I took the job because I wanted to help people, so I don't complain here. It was just tougher than I thought, but who says everything has to be easy?! 4 hours ago, LightAngel said: I took the job because I wanted to help people, so I don't complain here. It was just tougher than I thought, but who says everything has to be easy?! Yes, it is a job that pushes you beyond yourself into the realm of compassion, empathy, kindness, non judgment, caring, in a way that is hands on. Not every caregiver is a good one or suited to the position as it is so demanding ( emotional labor) and the risk for burnout is immense. But for those that are and you are certainly one of them, many lives are a better place for it. I have been reading your posts for awhile you demonstrate a maturity and wisdom and kindness that goes beyond the average. 3 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LightAngel Posted June 17, 2018 #89 Share Posted June 17, 2018 9 hours ago, Sherapy said: Yes, it is a job that pushes you beyond yourself into the realm of compassion, empathy, kindness, non judgment, caring, in a way that is hands on. Not every caregiver is a good one or suited to the position as it is so demanding ( emotional labor) and the risk for burnout is immense. But for those that are and you are certainly one of them, many lives are a better place for it. I have been reading your posts for awhile you demonstrate a maturity and wisdom and kindness that goes beyond the average. The same goes for you. You are also kind when you don't get paid, and that shows your true nature I did love my job at the nursing home, so I only quit the job because I was very young, and I wanted to try different things. 2 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+Sherapy Posted June 17, 2018 #90 Share Posted June 17, 2018 (edited) 2 hours ago, LightAngel said: The same goes for you. You are also kind when you don't get paid, and that shows your true nature I did love my job at the nursing home, so I only quit the job because I was very young, and I wanted to try different things. Although challenging while at the same time rewarding, it was an excellent choice, you began your life giving back and cultivating the beautiful, caring, kind persona that comes across. I have major respect for the caregivers of this world, a heart of empathy. I think it is a gift. Edited June 17, 2018 by Sherapy 2 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LightAngel Posted June 17, 2018 #91 Share Posted June 17, 2018 I love this quote by Roald Dahl, so I have to share 4 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LightAngel Posted June 24, 2018 #92 Share Posted June 24, 2018 On 14/6/2018 at 12:42 AM, markdohle said: Kindness comes from the heart, when it sees, and understands a person, or a situation. Sometimes real kindness is tough love. For example, if a person gets gentle love and kindness .......... but still is trapped in the same negative circle year after year. Then tough love is needed. And then you really have to tell the person what they need to hear instead of what they want to hear! They might not like you anymore after that, but at least you cared more about their well-being than your own selfish need to be loved! Some people are very selfish when they offer help, they care more about their own image than they care about doing what it takes to make a positive change. It's not easy to lose a friend because you told them what they needed to hear instead of what they wanted to hear. Sometimes tough love is the biggest kind of love we can share. And the least selfish! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LightAngel Posted June 25, 2018 #93 Share Posted June 25, 2018 On 16/6/2018 at 3:10 AM, StarMountainKid said: I think something dramatic had to happen to emphasize the point of Jesus' ultimate kindness. We can always start with some common sense Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
danydandan Posted June 25, 2018 #94 Share Posted June 25, 2018 Everything boiles down to selfishness. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
intoyoulikeatrain Posted June 26, 2018 #95 Share Posted June 26, 2018 On 6/13/2018 at 5:48 PM, XenoFish said: I think it's older than religion. Perhaps something we created during our nomads/tribal days. Or something we've been trying to imitate since the dawn of man. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
intoyoulikeatrain Posted June 26, 2018 #96 Share Posted June 26, 2018 On 6/15/2018 at 6:10 PM, StarMountainKid said: there's a story of a Buddhist monastery where one of the students keep stealing from the other students. Finally the student confesses to the Monk that he's been stealing. The student says, I'm such a bad person, I'll be the first in Hell. The Monk says, no I'll be in Hell before you. The student says, but master, your lead a perfect life, why would you go to Hell? The Monk says, if I'm not in Hell when you get there, who will be there to teach you right from wrong? There are many examples of people giving their lives to save others. Sort of the ultimate acts of kindness. This is supposed to be Jesus' sacrifice, dying on the cross somehow for the forgiveness of our sins. I don't quite understand that logic, but that's the general interpretation. I think something dramatic had to happen to emphasize the point of Jesus' ultimate kindness. There's a lot of suffering in the world, and we may feel sympathetic, but of course we go on with our own lives and really do nothing about it. Myself included. It's the folly of man trying to be god and be enslaved by its philosophy. More power/control. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StarMountainKid Posted June 26, 2018 #97 Share Posted June 26, 2018 18 minutes ago, intoyoulikeatrain said: It's the folly of man trying to be god and be enslaved by its philosophy. More power/control. I agree. There are exemplary examples of compassion we can admire, but we need to find our own way. When we become, as you say, enslaved by some philosophy, we loose our autonomy as self-determining human beings. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LightAngel Posted June 26, 2018 #98 Share Posted June 26, 2018 I don't know about you guys, but I'm just being me (God in my own life) It's common sense, and that is want we need more of if you ask me! I have nothing against Jesus (real or not) - it doesn't matter because the message is love. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
intoyoulikeatrain Posted June 26, 2018 #99 Share Posted June 26, 2018 28 minutes ago, LightAngel said: It's common sense, and that is want we need more of if you ask me! Where did you learn your common sense? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LightAngel Posted June 26, 2018 #100 Share Posted June 26, 2018 2 minutes ago, intoyoulikeatrain said: Where did you learn your common sense? All you have to do is learn from your experiences, or from other people's experiences. If you know how to analyze, then you know what common sense is. This also depends on what kind of life you want, of course. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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