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sci-nerd

Happiness

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sci-nerd

Happiness is something you lend. It can never be yours forever.

You can lend it for seconds, minutes, even hours and days, but you can only lend it. Never possess it.

So when you're happy, enjoy it! Don't think twice!

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DebDandelion

I don't agree. Happiness is within yourself. Then it stays yours. If you use outside factors to determine your happiness you will never grasp happiness. 

Its a choice within your own knowledge, you either let go of what is bothering you, or you fix what is bothering you so it doesn't bother you anymore.

Furthermore, it is a choice. 

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XenoFish

If you constantly pursue happiness you're going to be miserable. 

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Rlyeh
4 hours ago, DebDandelion said:

I don't agree. Happiness is within yourself. Then it stays yours. If you use outside factors to determine your happiness you will never grasp happiness. 

You could be confined to a prison cell for life and you'd still be happy?

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DebDandelion
57 minutes ago, Rlyeh said:

You could be confined to a prison cell for life and you'd still be happy?

That's the thing for me. Irrespective of your circumstances you can find that internal compass to guide you to happiness. Must I be miserable for my whole term( in jail)? Can I not find something to be grateful for and then have internal happiness?

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XenoFish
38 minutes ago, DebDandelion said:

That's the thing for me. Irrespective of your circumstances you can find that internal compass to guide you to happiness. Must I be miserable for my whole term( in jail)? Can I not find something to be grateful for and then have internal happiness?

I think you might be mistaking happiness for contentment. 

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DebDandelion
19 minutes ago, XenoFish said:

I think you might be mistaking happiness for contentment. 

Content means acceptance. ( i think Xeno)

I don't have to accept my sentence.(jail) 

But I sure as heck am not going to spend two years (example) In sadness and depression. Can I change the fact that I am in jail? No.

Now I have to focus on one (at least) good thing in my jail life. And that creates my internal happiness.

I don't allow the circumstances to influence my happiness. Happy doesn't mean rainbows and unicorns. Its an internal state of being(for me)

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DebDandelion
24 minutes ago, XenoFish said:

I think you might be mistaking happiness for contentment. 

Example from current situation.

My boss is not doing his work. School is suffering, teachers demoralised and discipline is in chaos.

So a) am I going to come to school, depressed and wanting to die cause today is a challenge? 

B) become unhappy at school and not be able to cope?

I can...

Or

I can focus on things I can fix. Things I can change. So I start with that. Am I tired? Yes

Am I sad that this is happening? Yes

But must i lose my internal happiness? Why? Because of external factors? I can't. My family life will suffer, my kids I am teaching will suffer, I won't wanna come to school?...

My smile must be from my heart. From my good thing I identify each day. 

I must find internal happiness for each day. Otherwise I Debbie, will die

 

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XenoFish

There is a difference.

happiness-versus-contentmen.jpg

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DebDandelion

Aaaah. Thanx Xeno.

So would all I have explained fall under content or happy?

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XenoFish
Just now, DebDandelion said:

Aaaah. Thanx Xeno.

So would all I have explained fall under content or happy?

I'm At work right now. When I'm off I'll be able to better process the conversation.

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DebDandelion
3 minutes ago, XenoFish said:

I'm At work right now. When I'm off I'll be able to better process the conversation.

Awesome. Catch up later then

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DebDandelion

Contentment is a mental or emotional state of satisfaction maybe drawn from being at ease in one's situation, body and mind. Colloquially speaking,contentment could be a state of having accepted one's situation and is a milder and more tentative form of happiness.

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DebDandelion

Wikipedia's great experiment: Finding adefinition of “happiness” we can all agree on. ... Happiness is a mental or emotional state of well-being definedby positive or pleasant emotions ranging from contentment to intensejoy.Apr 18, 2017

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XenoFish
1 minute ago, DebDandelion said:

Contentment is a mental or emotional state of satisfaction maybe drawn from being at ease in one's situation, body and mind. Colloquially speaking,contentment could be a state of having accepted one's situation and is a milder and more tentative form of happiness.

In other words. Contentment is a meaningful happiness. While happiness itself is a fleeting emotion.

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DebDandelion

Interesting

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Coil
15 hours ago, sci-nerd said:

Happiness is something you lend. It can never be yours forever.

You can lend it for seconds, minutes, even hours and days, but you can only lend it. Never possess it.

So when you're happy, enjoy it! Don't think twice!


As DebDandelion said happiness is within you and since the divine is eternal, happiness and bliss can be eternal and constantly felt if we open it in ourselves. But God has arranged a man so that he looks outside and not inside himself, therefore a person traditionally seeks happiness in external objects but since all created transient external objects or people do not contain absolute happiness and truth, therefore they quickly get bored of a person with time and eternal happiness contains God, soul spirit and spiritual levels.

Even if a man had his hands and feet cut off, but there would be divine bliss, he would be much happier than an ordinary person because it is impossible to impose any physical limitations on the human spirit.

I'll tell you that when a person is blessed from above when it seizes your head and you sit still on the couch, afraid to frighten off this incredible joy, then in this immovable state you want to spend all your life and work, money, friends, everything becomes insignificant in comparison with this state that opened as if someone opened a curtain in your head and allowed divine joy to overwhelm you. And if you walked along the street seeing unfortunate people or people in anger, then you would say to them -wait, here for you unearthly bliss, experience it and you will forever be happy.. And in this blissful state it is impossible to think bad or to do because all the ordinary is squeezed out of this blissful state. It is impossible to rise to this state ordinary feelings or try to imitate him, you understand clearly that this is something from above and not your feelings of happiness or joy.
According to the books, there is an even more intense joy when you can not sit still, and the body jerks and jumps from the waves of divine bliss that pile on the body and mind.

Many yogis who have achieved bliss, have nothing else to do in life and just sit still in their trance all their lives and their students pour in their mouths several sips of milk so that the body does not die, that's all they need from outer life. There is so much bliss and experience spirit.

 

 

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DebDandelion
2 hours ago, XenoFish said:

In other words. Contentment is a meaningful happiness. While happiness itself is a fleeting emotion.

I still think (need us to talk this through) that happinesses, true happiness is a choice. And what I gathered from the definitions (English not my mother tongue) is that contentment and happiness is linked, or at times intertwined. 

Hence for me happiness can be a choice irrespective of my outside stimuli...#sigh.

Xeno, if u don't agree u will need to walk me through it step by step so I can understand...

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XenoFish
26 minutes ago, DebDandelion said:

I still think (need us to talk this through) that happinesses, true happiness is a choice. And what I gathered from the definitions (English not my mother tongue) is that contentment and happiness is linked, or at times intertwined. 

Hence for me happiness can be a choice irrespective of my outside stimuli...#sigh.

Xeno, if u don't agree u will need to walk me through it step by step so I can understand...

I think that perhaps the easiest way to gauge this would be to ask yourself. How often am I happy? How often am I content?

That way you have a scale to go by. For myself, contentment wins. Happiness to me is like a laugh. It comes, then it goes. 

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MainerMikeBrown

Feeling happy doesn't last forever.  But then again, neither does feeling sad and depressed, which is why, when I feel sad, I tell myself that happiness will return, especially if I do something about the cause of my unhappiness at the time.

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XenoFish

Depression can last years, so can regret and self hate. Even a lifetime.

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Wes83

Huh. I'm happy :)

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PsiSeeker
On 8/20/2018 at 9:23 AM, sci-nerd said:

Happiness is something you lend. It can never be yours forever.

You can lend it for seconds, minutes, even hours and days, but you can only lend it. Never possess it.

So when you're happy, enjoy it! Don't think twice!

My first language isn't English.  Did you mean loan?  Lend as in from yourself, loan from another?

Interesting thought, I think I get your meaning but word choice is throwing me.

Happiness is something we pull from an external source however the source won't generate the happiness forever.  So in that sense we acquire happiness from a source however it only lasts while the source let's as lend it.  Okay maybe right choice of words.

I like this, it runs along the same lines as some of my thinking that the point isn't to experience happiness, happiness is a side effect of doing something.  To chase the happiness is an illusion.  It just happens to happen sometime when doing something, particularly something that's meaningful.  Don't enjoy the happiness, enjoy the action that produces the happiness. 

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RabidMongoose
On ‎20‎/‎08‎/‎2018 at 12:23 AM, sci-nerd said:

Happiness is something you lend. It can never be yours forever.

You can lend it for seconds, minutes, even hours and days, but you can only lend it. Never possess it.

So when you're happy, enjoy it! Don't think twice!

Time to learn how to manage your thoughts.

Then you get to be happy all of the time. Take a pen and paper. Note down every thought you have over an hour and what emotions it causes in you.

Thoughts cause emotions. Not immediately either, they lag behind by a minute or two. They also take a minute or two to turn off once you stop the thoughts causing it. The reason for the start-up lag and shutdown delay is that hormones cause your negative emotions. It takes time for them to get around your body in your blood stream and time for their levels to drop once circulating.

Once you see the connection spend the day stopping all thoughts which will cause an emotion in you. Dont try to stop the emotions themselves, just the thoughts that trigger them. Repeat throughout the whole of your life (or when you remember too).

The more you do it the weaker your emotions become.

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DebDandelion
5 hours ago, RabidMongoose said:

Time to learn how to manage your thoughts.

Then you get to be happy all of the time. Take a pen and paper. Note down every thought you have over an hour and what emotions it causes in you.

Thoughts cause emotions. Not immediately either, they lag behind by a minute or two. They also take a minute or two to turn off once you stop the thoughts causing it. The reason for the start-up lag and shutdown delay is that hormones cause your negative emotions. It takes time for them to get around your body in your blood stream and time for their levels to drop once circulating.

Once you see the connection spend the day stopping all thoughts which will cause an emotion in you. Dont try to stop the emotions themselves, just the thoughts that trigger them. Repeat throughout the whole of your life (or when you remember too).

The more you do it the weaker your emotions become.

That is very well explained actually. Thanx

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