Demon oppression? Spirit of the dead? Shadow?

[+Not A Rockstar]

15 minutes ago, XenoFish said:

In the context of this thread. I have a deep sense of escapism from the OP, a way of masking her pain, because it is easier to run from it than face it. While this idea might not set well with others, it is a real thing. She needs help from a professional in order to work through all that's happened. Not because we told her to, but for her own sake. To better adjust to the world around her. Fantasy has it place, it shouldn't override reality.

I agree.

The OP is a separate matter I never felt the first desire to address, frankly. It is textbook cluster from playing off into psychic and paranormal adventuring rooted in the notion one is made of special stuff and getting jacked up by it. But, until the victim realizes she does need real help and cannot woo out of it and gets help, there isn't much to do but try and get insulted and told you do not understand. I work my own godkids through sinkholes like this, I know them well, but not strangers. That eclectic path work she brags on needs a few real Elders on it for her to turn to. Most out there don't have any real ones... because they produce none. Just saying. Reason for that. Choose a better way.

What is that saying about not messing with dragons because you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup? Too much woo becomes a dragon.

She will heal herself or get help or break. Kind of out of my hands. I got lured in by the mention of Vodou and am now out of it. Literally, as I am heading out the door for a day of cooking the holiday meal for the family and watching football while the girls clean up the mess  

Smart people learn how to cook the best so they do not miss the game   Go Saints!!

[Kittens Are Jerks]

12 minutes ago, Not A Rockstar said:

The OP is a separate matter I never felt the first desire to address, frankly. It is textbook cluster from playing off into psychic and paranormal adventuring rooted in the notion one is made of special stuff and getting jacked up by it. But, until the victim realizes she does need real help and cannot woo out of it and gets help, there isn't much to do but try and get insulted and told you do not understand.

How ironic. Guilty of the very same thing you accused me of. The OP is hardly getting 'jacked up' on the paranormal, nor does she give the impression she deems herself made of 'special stuff'. Her situation is far more complex and deeper than that. This is a person coping with horrific trauma, addiction issues, and who knows what else. She's not playing or adventuring, she's merely trying to deal with life and circumstances the best way she can.

I truly hope she decides to speak to a medical professional, but until she does, if a phantom soldier gives her the strength she needs, then so be it.

[XenoFish]

35 minutes ago, Not A Rockstar said:

She will heal herself or get help or break. Kind of out of my hands.

Out of all our hands. As for the eclectic path. Only so much you can Frankenstein together before it all starts to look like a dumpster fire.

[Kittens Are Jerks]

10 hours ago, Not A Rockstar said:

The words mean exactly that and I do not see how they can be misinterpreted, unless KAJ meant them to the OP and not me. However, quoting Xeno speaking to me, makes it directed to me. I already stated in my first post to clarify how Vodou sees the sexuality question which arose that I don't care about others' beliefs, was merely posting what Vodou says about its own business. I have never preached here. I refuse students of Vodou. I am not even actively running a House these days. I am not the OP, I posted to clarify Vodou, not anything else. 

If KAJ has an issue with me, I don't know about it, and your request surprises me, over a minor exchange, but, ok, here is what she said. It is quite direct, though couched in nice words. You are a well educated man. The words mean what they say. She (he?) wrote them and certainly knows what was meant. It is the skeptic position here at UM, essentially. 

First of all, my comments were NOT directed at you. Xeno made a general statement — a statement I happened to agree with. I stated as much, and elaborated, choosing words I hoped would resonate with the OP more so than anyone else. If I wanted to address you, I would have done so directly. I'm not a coward.

I've already made it clear that you inferred all the wrong things from my statement, yet you continue to impose your interpretation on it. I am not going to bother explaining it, as it is quite straightforward, with no hidden slights or insults. If the OP returns and wants me to further clarify it, I will. Until then, you can rest assured that nothing in my statement had anything to do with superstition, ignorance, or delusions, and everything to do with the complexity of our brains and how that complexity can throw us for a loop every now and again. That's it, that's all.

 

[violetraven7]

Ha. Wow you all are still going. I just wanted to apologise if I became offensive at all. I was merely attempting to be more clear with you all. And still doesn't seem to be getting through. Lol 

I never denied needing help first point. I simply asked specific questions. Thats all i was tryingto say. Sheesh. 

Secondly, and seriously people please read over. Alot of what I wrote was speculation. I am not even sure if there are connections between the several things i mentioned. And the most contraversial thing i mentioned, again, happened once, 20 years ago. 

I didn't tell you all personal things without realizing some of them can be misconstrued and are big things. It just seems you all thinking have no idea that i have issues. 

You have no idea if im seeing a therapist, if i had plans to, if I money to, what my other issues are, nor do you know specifics about certain things. 

I asked if there were connections between this and that. And what people thought it could be, assuming this website appeared to be open mineded to metaphysical or unexplained things. 

Which is why you all have no idea about the psychology aspect of it from my point of view. I was asking  spiritual/metaphysical questions. I thought i was in safe place to do so. 

Not be completely analyzed by psych doctors. Which whatever that's fine. But you all caught me by surprised by assuming all different kinda of things that I just weren't expecting from a website like this. 

I'm allowed to see this situation from all possible sides. I understand the heaviness of my issues. Those aren't really for you all to truly decipher. I mean, you could make it worse for all we know. 
Happy Thanksgiving!!

[+joc]

3 hours ago, violetraven7 said:

Ha. Wow you all are still going. I just wanted to apologise if I became offensive at all. I was merely attempting to be more clear with you all. And still doesn't seem to be getting through. Lol 

I never denied needing help first point. I simply asked specific questions. Thats all i was tryingto say. Sheesh. 

Secondly, and seriously people please read over. Alot of what I wrote was speculation. I am not even sure if there are connections between the several things i mentioned. And the most contraversial thing i mentioned, again, happened once, 20 years ago. 

I didn't tell you all personal things without realizing some of them can be misconstrued and are big things. It just seems you all thinking have no idea that i have issues. 

You have no idea if im seeing a therapist, if i had plans to, if I money to, what my other issues are, nor do you know specifics about certain things. 

I asked if there were connections between this and that. And what people thought it could be, assuming this website appeared to be open mineded to metaphysical or unexplained things. 

Which is why you all have no idea about the psychology aspect of it from my point of view. I was asking  spiritual/metaphysical questions. I thought i was in safe place to do so. 

Not be completely analyzed by psych doctors. Which whatever that's fine. But you all caught me by surprised by assuming all different kinda of things that I just weren't expecting from a website like this. 

I'm allowed to see this situation from all possible sides. I understand the heaviness of my issues. Those aren't really for you all to truly decipher. I mean, you could make it worse for all we know. 
Happy Thanksgiving!!

Happy Thanksgiving!

..B U T...

...you did ask for opinions.  And...some of us analyze practically everything about everything.  Because of the nature of the forum...there is a plethora of posts claiming this, that and the other...especially 'the other'.  So...while you may think that we are psycho-analyzing you, in reality we are weighing a certain knowledge of truth of things against the 'metaphysical/unexplained' things.  Perhaps you were thinking that everyone is all in for whatever and totally open-minded about everything.    Nothing could be further from the truth.  

For instance...I personally do not believe in anything supernatural.  Anything!  There is a very natural and logical reason for the way the universe operates and everything in the universe follows the same agenda of realness.  There are no ghosts, no afterlife, no gods, no demons, no aliens, no metaphysical this-ers or that-ers.  But that's just my perspective. So...I read a post like yours...and I'm not judging you...I'm just offering my opinion on what you wrote..because you said that was one reason you were posting it.  Maybe the old adage...Be careful what you wish for...applies. 

Anyway...there is only so much can say about a post such as yours.  Unless you want to divulge more information...which you may...or maybe you don't.  But regardless...the way most things go in this kind of forum is, someone will say something, and someone will offer their thoughts on that, and on and on and on...and before you know it...your thread has turned into something much different than what you intended for it to be.  So...in that light...if you want to stay focused on your Original Post...then you must participate.  You don't have to, but...left to itself, it will take on a life of it's own and eventually things become more personal than they should and ...wallah...a moderator will just close the thread.

Having said all that...  *takes breath and wipes sweat from forehead   ...  Are you engaged in therapy?   Do you have any thing you want to update to your original post that might be more inclusive to feedback?  Just asking.  You don't need or have to answer anything.   Just saying.  

[violetraven7]

I believed Ive responded to this type of comment before. I didn't say I didn't ask questions. I asked specific questions. Why would people ignore the questions that are asked and give different answers based on your preference to answer? That's a waste of your time & mine. 

I don't believe that I said that I thought everyone had the same perspective here. Why would you even retort with that? I stated I thought I was in safe space. Not that every single person would give the perspectives i was looking for. I thought maybe the comments would be a bit more eclectic in perspectives. Its not that rare to assume. 

I'm unsure of how many times I need to repeat myself before I'm truly heard.

There have been many assumptions about me and for many reasons. Including to resist understanding my point of view. Or to war against simple things im saying that doesn't even pertain. 

As you've done in your own reply, stating instructions on how a forum works? Really? Lol Silly. I feel alot of what is said here is to simply cause reaction. 

As far as the nature of the universe. I don't believe anyone has a concrete answer which imo says that anything is possible. However regardless of the reasons for my experiences they are a part of my experience. That's that. So as everyone may be free to atate their perspective. Im free to say my opinion on any comment i receive. 

Thanks!

[XenoFish]

I already gave you my opinion. You still have an imaginary friend. 

[+joc]

1 hour ago, violetraven7 said:

Im free to say my opinion on any comment i receive. 

Thanks!

You are indeed.  i was not instructing you on how forums work.  I was telling you how this forum works.  And...I too have already given you my opinion.  

And it is based on this:

Quote

One of my very first memories, I was about five years old,  Suddenly I saw/felt the presence of a large black thick mist approaching ...I could sense the black mist shaping a male very tall humanoid shape.

You remember the Black Mist as a tall male.
 

Quote

I've also had many people feel this inclination to produce a rape fantasy including me and they feel inclined to inform me. I've also had two people, male and female rape me when I was younger. Separately and together. As they were married. 

You were sexually abused when you were younger.
 

Quote

I always wondered if this works connected because when i was 15 Iwas seduced by a spirit and I always thought it was him tho he didn't say so. I call him Draven. The sex i had with this spirit wasn't aggressive nor painful. But it felt more like the spirit was talking me into it by his touch. It was sensual even tho it was crossing boundaries. It's never been confirmed that it was him and it only happened the one time. 

You sexualized your Black Mist Spirit Friend....even naming him...thereby...personalizing it.
 

Quote

I'm not necessarily negative but I don't trust people. And I'm nearly an agoraphobic. I have addiction issues.  I'm always in control of my actions, my thoughts, etc. But when I lose control it's like He comes out. 

You have trust issues. You have addiction issues.  You have control issues. Your words not mine.

Quote

 

I asked if there were connections between this and that. And what people thought it could be, assuming this website appeared to be open mineded to metaphysical or unexplained things. 

Which is why you all have no idea about the psychology aspect of it from my point of view. I was asking  spiritual/metaphysical questions. I thought i was in safe place to do so.

 

 Pardon me for saying so Amy but... your assuming  readers are going to just have an eclectic, open minded, spiritual/metaphysical attitude toward your story is an assumption that was totally and completely incorrect.

I told you my perspective.  Your spirit friend isn't a demon...it is you.  You said ...you all have no idea about the psychology aspect of it from my point of view... I am telling you, some of us do.  You want people to listen to you and take you seriously...but you don't want to hear what anyone has to say if it differs from your original point of view.  I think it is this attitude that creates much of the strife you have with people in your life.   Good luck Amy!  Seriously...I wish you good luck!

 

 

[XenoFish]

14 minutes ago, joc said:

You remember the Black Mist as a tall male.

https://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2013/10/29/imaginary-friends/

[moonman]

All I'm hearing from the OP in every reply is denial.

[violetraven7]

Alright my readers, you all are tedious now and repeating the misunderstanding & repeating your original opinion of my original post. Lol wonderful.

You all are dedicated to rejecting everything down to my intention. I truly didn't give two twirly ****s, you gave your opinions, I gave you my thoughrs on your opinion. 

I tried tp make nice and further ezplainy intention several times in hopes to even make a connection or friend! Lol

You all rejected every effort i made. And chose to see me as what makes sense to you and what also keeps you all from questioning yourself even slightly. 

Whatever. You all keep on keeping on with that. I didnt comebhere to argue my intention. I attempted to expkain myself more often than cherry pick you guys. 

Im allowed to dosagree with everything that you all think aboute. Without you becoming tedious and usingy own words against me. 

I explained myself. If you all see it in a wsy that I deem as wrong. It is what it is. Just ad your tyeories of my original post was what it was. 

Even stil im allowed to want to see elcectic comments. So what? Aruging witj me now and my last few posts is as delusional as you view me demon.

Seriously, you all are as flawed as anyone else. Anyone whom woule argue a girl who is simply trying to be understood has missed the point. 

Ive saod many truce inspiring things lately and you ignore it and continue to piint our my words to attmept to prove im being a certain way. 

Have fun with that. Im done listening to peopel who are committed to misunderstanding intention thats spelled out again and again. Good way to treat someone yo uthink is traumatized. 

Good going. 

 

 

[+joc]

51 minutes ago, violetraven7 said:

Alright my readers, you all are tedious now and repeating the misunderstanding & repeating your original opinion of my original post. Lol wonderful.

You all are dedicated to rejecting everything down to my intention. I truly didn't give two twirly ****s, you gave your opinions, I gave you my thoughrs on your opinion. 

I tried tp make nice and further ezplainy intention several times in hopes to even make a connection or friend! Lol

You all rejected every effort i made. And chose to see me as what makes sense to you and what also keeps you all from questioning yourself even slightly. 

Whatever. You all keep on keeping on with that. I didnt comebhere to argue my intention. I attempted to expkain myself more often than cherry pick you guys. 

Im allowed to dosagree with everything that you all think aboute. Without you becoming tedious and usingy own words against me. 

I explained myself. If you all see it in a wsy that I deem as wrong. It is what it is. Just ad your tyeories of my original post was what it was. 

Even stil im allowed to want to see elcectic comments. So what? Aruging witj me now and my last few posts is as delusional as you view me demon.

Seriously, you all are as flawed as anyone else. Anyone whom woule argue a girl who is simply trying to be understood has missed the point. 

Ive saod many truce inspiring things lately and you ignore it and continue to piint our my words to attmept to prove im being a certain way. 

Have fun with that. Im done listening to peopel who are committed to misunderstanding intention thats spelled out again and again. Good way to treat someone yo uthink is traumatized. 

Good going. 

 

 

Always remember Amy...

Just because you are paranoid does not necessarily mean that they are not out to get you.

Quote

you all are tedious now and repeating the misunderstanding & repeating your original opinion of my original post.

It is not the things that happen in life to us that are so important.  It is how we think about the things that happen to us in life that is important.  Grab a cappuccino, tell your Misty Spirit to take a walk, and speak for yourself.  Getting all annoyed with other people's opinions about something you said is kind of ridiculous.  Grow up...in other words Amy.  Stop being the child of the Mist and start being the adult in the room of her own problems.  No one can fix your life but you.  So...open your mind...take a deep breath...exhale the Mist...and speak from your heart...

The problem is...not a psychologist so there is no charge involved here...the problem is, there is a little girl who has built a fortress around your heart...complete with moat and drawbridge.  The little girl pulls up the drawbridge when she feels threatened...a defense mechanism for protecting her heart.  She locks some people out, and she locks other people in.  

All you really have to do is talk to the little girl.  Tell her you understand.  Tell her it is nap time.  Take the keys Amy.  Throw them in the moat, take a bulldozer and start destroying the fortress around your heart.  It might be scary at first with no fortress...it gets better.