Psychiatric Hospital Dream

[DeKnighter]

This site was one I've stumbled across and more specifically the dream section because I find the mind to be fascinating and what people think fascinating. So I'm gonna share a few dreams specifically I'll start with the one I had while in the psychiatric hospital. So I'll start from the beginning before I make my way into the dream so you all have context. I was 21(now 24) when I checked myself in. I had been in a mentally and physically abusive relationship. I fealt like I wanted to die so I checked myself in fearing for my own safety and the safety of others(lashing out). So I went in and I couldn't sleep the first nite. I was given medication to put me under when the night had come. I had been living with my television on or my PC on every night because I enjoy the background noise. We weren't allowed to have stimuli before bed. So they gave me the medication that night and this is where things get really interesting. 

In this dream I had successfully committed suicide. I then began to see the after effects. The sad people and what not. Well the person who I had an abusive relationship with had been brought into a room It was like an interrogation room. All metal, grey, dark and dimly lit all except for the lamp hanging from the ceiling. They have this person a piece of paper and said "Here I want you to tell me how you feel." So in perfect hand writing it was written "I hate you." And then that was that. Then it was the second day, they wrote "I love you." though the hand writing looked a little off though wasn't completely noticeable. Then the third day rolled around and this is where things start ramping up a little. They wrote "Why did you do it" The hand writing looked scratched and fast. The 4th day "I miss you" the hand writing now darker and more scratchy like it was done with long finger nails rather than hand writing. Then the 5th day. "I miss you so much, please come back" The same scratchy hand writing the black ink thicker, scratches of X's all over the page. The 6th day "I love you, please come back to me." Much more serious and grim the worlds larger than ever, the ink thick, the X's scratchy. It just got worse and worse. On the 7th day it was confirmed that the person had taken their own life. 

This was a real eye opener for me. To me it rang as a sign of what would have happened if I had successfully done it. I just want to know others thoughts and ideas on this one. 

[preacherman76]

Wow, I’m surprised this post hasn’t gotten any responses. 

So you are saying you had this dream consecutive nights? Or did the days pass in one dream?

Often people who contemplate suicide end up sticking around because they know the pain they would cause. 

Its a great thing your mind played that out in a dream. Even if it was only showing how your abuser would be effected. 

I hope you come back. 

[White Crane Feather]

You are dealing with a tremendous amount of trauma. My heart reaches out to you. The fact that you checked yourself in shows an unusual amount of self awareness. I wish I had a clear answer for you, but your dream and your circumstances make a lot of sense to me. 

If you indulge my beliefs for a moment. I believe there are healing beings that are sitting with you and working on solutions for you. I have seen them and what they do. Hang in there, and maintain that awesome self awareness you have. It’s likely you are a giving person because abusive people are attracted to givers, you deserve and can have better.