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jypsijemini

What made you abandon Christianity?

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jypsijemini
35 minutes ago, Habitat said:

Well, you haven't "let go". You might ask yourself about why that might be so. But, if you insist you have let go, then you will be spinning the wheels for a while yet.

Why is your focus on 'letting go'? I didn't ask for therapy. I abandoned my religious beliefs. I didn't let go of the reasons why I'd 'let it go' from my life.

Like @Sherapy pointed out:

3 hours ago, Sherapy said:

Rumination is part of the healing process, breaking up is one thing clarity, insight, and wisdom gleaned is another. 
The point is one wouldn’t want residue negative baggage, so it helps to explore and talk about it with others.

 

 

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Sherapy
2 minutes ago, jypsijemini said:

Why is your focus on 'letting go'? I didn't ask for therapy. I abandoned my religious beliefs. I didn't let go of the reasons why I'd 'let it go' from my life.

Like @Sherapy pointed out:

 

Exactly, his comments have nothing to do with the thread and you are not asking for advice.

It is very healing and positive to talk about religion. 
 

Habit,  you have not contributed to the actual point of the thread. 
 

Do you have any thing to share as to why you left Christianity behind? Are you even religious?
 
Jypsi, have you heard of Body Work, it takes Rekii to  the next level?

I have a good friend who does this too. 
 


 

 

 

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Jodie.Lynne
13 minutes ago, jypsijemini said:

Why is your focus on 'letting go'?

You would be much better off putting that guy on ignore. He loves to pontificate on things he knows nothing about. Just a suggestion. :)

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jypsijemini
4 minutes ago, Sherapy said:

Jypsi, have you heard of Body Work, it takes Rekii to  the next level?

I have a good friend who does this too.

I've never heard of it before! Please enlighten me! :wub:

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jypsijemini
2 minutes ago, Jodie.Lynne said:

You would be much better off putting that guy on ignore. He loves to pontificate on things he knows nothing about. Just a suggestion. :)

Sage advice, thank you Jodie! :nw:

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Sherapy
2 minutes ago, Jodie.Lynne said:

You would be much better off putting that guy on ignore. He loves to pontificate on things he knows nothing about. Just a suggestion. :)

I agree, otherwise a really great thread is at risk for getting trolled and closed down. 
 

He can start his own thread about what he wants to. 

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Sherapy
1 minute ago, jypsijemini said:

I've never heard of it before! Please enlighten me! :wub:

I will pm you.:wub:

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Habitat
7 minutes ago, jypsijemini said:

Sage advice, thank you Jodie! :nw:

You will do just fine here, with all these people who have "let go", but are still reminiscing about it for old time's sake ! It's a bit like an AA meeting I guess, they are all "dry" now, but are worried about a relapse !

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psyche101

Great to see you back PA. And I'm really happy for you and new directions.

All the best old friend. Hope to see more of you.

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Sherapy
23 minutes ago, Paranoid Android said:

I was a regular church-going Christian for over fifteen years from the age of 19-37 (I turned 40 last week, so just a few years since my deconversion). Any of the older members on here will tell you that I used to be one of the strongest defenders of the Christian faith here on UM. What led me to deconvert was a long, LONG story. Ultimately it boils down to what was best for my mental health. I had a lot of self esteem issues (have had them since childhood, a result of childhood bullying), so when I heard about Christianity, I felt "broken" and so the message that I was broken echoed with me. That is the core of Christianity - you can't get to God yourself because you're a worthless sinner, but Jesus died for you so you don't have to be perfect. But I was also in a bad headspace for years, living with depression behind the scenes. One of my therapists once gave me an article to read and in it the author of the article was discussing Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs (Link), and wrote that "the most important relationship you can have is with yourself".

Obviously "the most important relationship you can have is with yourself" is a very different message to "the most important relationship you can have is with Jesus". But in order to beat my depression I made a conscious statement - "I am perfect just the way I am". Also contradictory to Christianity. When that happened the theology of Christianity became redundant in my life and I deconverted. I don't need salvation, I am not a worthless sinner, and that attitude has changed my whole life for the better!

Thanks for the question,

~ Regards, PA 

Robbie!!

Great to see you.

How are you?

What is your path these days?
 

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Sherapy
1 hour ago, jypsijemini said:

Such powerful statements, thank you so much for sharing, P A!

Your description of feeling broken and being attracted by the Christian idea of brokenness is so profound! My jaw dropped when I read that.

It's something that I notice now about the content of many modern churches - the song lyrics are flooded with, "I surrender, save me, lift me up, make me whole, forgive me, I was lost but now I'm found, a sinner like me, hold me in your arms, restore my soul" etc. It solidifies the idea that we are weak, vulnerable, inherently bad, incomplete and lost without Jesus.

Followed by repetitious descriptions of Jesus, "my saviour, protector, deliverer, my King, my heart's desire" and dedicating oneself to the belief: "I worship you, honour you, I will follow you all the days of my life, I give my life to you, you are all I want, I give you my heart and soul, I live for you alone, have your way in me".

Constant, repetitious indoctrination that stresses the core message: "You are not enough as you are. You were born sinful just because you're human. God created you and loves you - but original sin sealed your fate. The only way to save ones soul is to believe."

"The most important relationship you can have is with yourself" (vs) "Jesus" is also an incredibly profound observation. I've noticed this take over my own family in a huge way. I went through years of abandonment issues when my parents decided to return to Papua New Guinea where I grew up as a missionary kid. I'd lived there for all of my teenage years and returned to my home country right before my eighteenth birthday. I had no idea how to function as an adult in a western society. It took me years of solo trial and error to form a rough picture of the expectations my society had for me, let alone put them into practice. My parents allowed for six months to "settle" me in the home country and then took off with my brother back to PNG. My church offered no support even though they knew how long I'd been overseas for. My bible college offered no support even though I told them I was becoming suicidal and self-harming. Jesus was always "the answer".

While my faith teetered on the fence, I was incredibly angry with God for expecting my parents to choose Him over their own children. They quoted bible verses to rationalise their decision. They sought God's approval and blessing over our relationship and my wellbeing. Granted, nobody is responsible for my happiness, health and wellbeing other than me - but I didn't understand that at the time. I just grappled with a God who claimed to love me, who gave me my family and just as "the Lord giveth, the Lord taketh away". My younger brother has continued down the same path. This Sunday, he'll become ordained as a Lutheran Minister and move away with my sister-in-law and my niece to a town 5 hours away to begin his pastoral ministry. Again, the Lord taketh away. Or rather, the faith requires the sacrifice of family and relationships.

I resonate so deeply with your final statement: "I don't need salvation, I am not a worthless sinner, and that attitude has changed my whole life for the better!" It's the tagline of my deconversion too! Christians claim that they are "free" in Christ, but nothing could really be further from the truth. There is no freedom in fearing condemnation (even though they believe there is nothing to fear because they are saved). Only the Bible and their belief in it convinces them that they are sinful - because the scriptures lay out what sin is and claims that all humanity inherited original sin from the very beginning. The constant brainwashing of concepts such as "I am unworthy but the Lord is generous, merciful and gracious and therefore offers me salvation that I cannot possibly earn or repay" keeps them deeply indoctrinated and loyal and subservient.

All that said, I love and respect what my parents and my brother are trying to achieve. While I struggle with their theologies, I see an immense amount of love, compassion and good-will in their lives. They are kind, gentle, generous and loving people. They're loving everybody around them. To me, this is just their path this time round. Their souls are still experiencing the truth - that Love is all you need - but it's just all squished up in there with a lot of doctrine and religious philosophy. It's still getting through. They're still experiencing the meaning of life. They may never break away from religious programming but I can see that many Christians have a very deep connection to and strong ability to Love. I can't fault any genuine expression of Love, no matter where it comes from or what the reasoning is behind it. I'm just glad that they're using their lives to love others and support whoever they can.

Wow, this is so candid. Thank you for sharing. 

You are correct children need their parents. 


 

 

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freetoroam
5 hours ago, Hammerclaw said:

Are you sure you don't mean Government?

I certainly would not worship any governments,  even though I am sure some in power believe they are either sent from god or is god. 

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Farmer77
1 minute ago, freetoroam said:

I certainly would not worship any governments,  even though I am sure some in power believe they are either sent from god or is god. 

Ironically the Christian belief that all rulers were sent by god to be obeyed and the massive real world inconsistencies resulting from that were a huge part of my abandoning Christianity.

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Coil
7 hours ago, jypsijemini said:

@Coil

Did you not read the thread description, mate?

It doesn't seem like you're an ex-Christian sharing the reasons why you left religion.

This wasn't an invitation to come and discuss why my theories and beliefs are wrong to you. Go find someone else to debate with.

Okay, I'm sorry, I thought it would help you explain some points, because you described them in detail on points.

Do you know why there is no God in Buddhism? Buddha perfectly understood that people would not understand the actions of God because it contains the opposites that a person cannot accept with his mind, therefore the faith of a person in God and religion will be undermined, therefore he refused to talk about God and concentrated people to practice.
I wish you not to lose the path to God and not to be disappointed in him, for he is one for all religions and teachings.

 

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Habitat
1 hour ago, Farmer77 said:

Ironically the Christian belief that all rulers were sent by god to be obeyed and the massive real world inconsistencies resulting from that were a huge part of my abandoning Christianity.

Oh ? I must have missed the Papal encyclical on that ?

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Farmer77
4 minutes ago, Habitat said:

Oh ? I must have missed the Papal encyclical on that ?

Papal encyclical? Yeah amigo the Christians I was raised by would have called you worse than the pagans for talking like that.

 

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Farmer77
8 minutes ago, Habitat said:

Oh ? I must have missed the Papal encyclical on that ?

Sorry I didnt fully respond, I was genuinely taken aback by your response.

Ive sat through multiple multiple sermons on that very subject. Its been a while but I do believe they were mostly based on Romans 13:1

Quote

13 Let everyone be subject to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God.

 

Edited by Farmer77
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Habitat
29 minutes ago, Farmer77 said:

Sorry I didnt fully respond, I was genuinely taken aback by your response.

Ive sat through multiple multiple sermons on that very subject. Its been a while but I do believe they were mostly based on Romans 13:1

 

Right, well this would be in the same vein as the "render unto Caesar" business, little doubt these texts are not in the business of wanting to promote usurpers of secular authority, and for obvious reasons.

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Farmer77
7 minutes ago, Habitat said:

Right, well this would be in the same vein as the "render unto Caesar" business, little doubt these texts are not in the business of wanting to promote usurpers of secular authority, and for obvious reasons.

I would say that its even possible the only reason they exist at all is to keep a subjugated populace "in their place". At least the Gospels anyways.

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Habitat
15 minutes ago, Farmer77 said:

I would say that its even possible the only reason they exist at all is to keep a subjugated populace "in their place". At least the Gospels anyways.

Put it this way, anything that would tend toward disrespect of the ruling authority, would have to have been expunged, for them to be allowed to operate. The religious and the cultural, at the retail end of religion, were inextricably bound. In a democratic system, not so much.

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Djedi
8 hours ago, Habitat said:

You will do just fine here, with all these people who have "let go", but are still reminiscing about it for old time's sake ! It's a bit like an AA meeting I guess, they are all "dry" now, but are worried about a relapse !

There are indeed people who think they have let go of their old beliefs but who will 'relapse', 'return to the fold' or whatever you want to call it. It happens to some. Doesn't mean this applies / will apply to the posters in this thread, you can't know that.

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Habitat
6 minutes ago, Djedi said:

There are indeed people who think they have let go of their old beliefs but who will 'relapse', 'return to the fold' or whatever you want to call it. It happens to some. Doesn't mean this applies / will apply to the posters in this thread, you can't know that.

The point is, that those who have put something behind them, usually don't feel the need to keep on talking about it. A bit like those old flared trousers, we don't trot them out for another run, they stay somewhere in the dark recesses of a wardrobe, for strictly historical purposes only.

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Crazy Horse
On 12/2/2019 at 12:09 AM, Jodie.Lynne said:

What made me abandon Christianity?

Hypocrisy

Greed

Inconsistency

Lack of evidence

Sexual abuse

 

I cant disagree too much that organised religion, and therefore Christianity are guilty of this stuff.

But lets not throw the baby, (the baby Jesus in this case) out with the bath-water!

All the above has nothing to do with Christ, and it certainly has nothing to do with God.

The message of Christ is a super powerful one, and its this message that is important, not the messenger, not the dogma, not the rituals, the Church or the priest class. 

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