RoofGardener 17,379 #1 Posted February 4, 2020 (edited) Well, it appears that the Democrats have made a bit of a mess of their first Caucus. The Iowa caucus has been unable to post its results. This is being blamed on a phone app, which refused to function properly on the grounds that there weren't enough 'woke' transgender Palestinians in the voting quorum, so the App voided ALL the votes to prevent White Christians from winning, in accordance with National Democratic Guidelines. Um.. actually.. I might have got that a bit wrong.. But the App failed anyway. So they had to use telephones instead. And then the telephone network collapsed under the strain. So they had to use carrier pigeons, but it appears that these where all eaten by Republican Hawks. So nobody - yet - knows who won the Iowa caucus. Well, not the DEMOCRATIC caucus, anyway. The Republicans had no problems at all: they all voted for Donald Trump. Meanwhile, Democratic campaign managers are frantically assuring everyone that (a) the App wasn't hacked, and (b) there where unspecified problems with it, which meant that (c) they couldn't trust its results, so they are having to... well.. nobody knows WHAT they are going to do ? All a bit of an embarrassment, really. As people (1) are already saying... if they can't be trusted to run a caucus, should we REALLY trust them to run the country ? (1) Mostly gloating republicans, it has to be said. But hey.. they're people as well. Edited February 4, 2020 by RoofGardener 1 10 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Desertrat56 21,460 #2 Posted February 4, 2020 2 minutes ago, RoofGardener said: Well, it appears that the Democrats have made a bit of a mess of their first Caucus. The Iowa caucus has been unable to post its results. This is being blamed on a phone app, which refused to function properly on the grounds that there weren't enough 'woke' transgender Palestinians in the voting quorum, so it voided all the votes to prevent White Christians from winning, in accordance with national Democratic Guidelines. Um.. actually.. I might have got that a bit wrong.. But the App failed anyway. So they had to use telephones instead. And then the telephone network collapsed under the strain. So they had to use carrier pigeons, but it appears that these where all eaten by Republican Hawks. So nobody - yet - knows who won the Iowa caucus. Well, not the DEMOCRATIC caucus, anyway. The Republicans had no problems at all: they all voted for Donald Trump. Meanwhile, Democratic campaign managers are frantically assuring everyone that (a) the App wasn't hacked, and (b) there where unspecified problems with it, which meant that (c) they couldn't trust its results, so they are having to... well.. nobody knows WHAT they are going to do ? All a bit of an embarrassment, really. As people (1) are already saying... if they can't be trusted to run a caucus, should we REALLY trust them to run the country ? (1) Mostly gloating republicans, it has to be said. Didn't any of them have a laptop? Why use an app anyway, that just sounds like teenagers were running it. 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RoofGardener 17,379 #3 Posted February 4, 2020 (edited) 4 minutes ago, Desertrat56 said: Didn't any of them have a laptop? Why use an app anyway, that just sounds like teenagers were running it. Well, they can't have ADULT Democrats running it. That would be to perpetuate the colonial racist attitudes of the previous generations, instead of having Woke teenagers. Ideally one-legged black Palestinian transgender teenagers. From Mexico . Edited February 4, 2020 by RoofGardener 3 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Buzz_Light_Year 4,258 #4 Posted February 4, 2020 The App probably isn't working because the results weren't what the DNC wanted and now they're in damage control. 11 3 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
XenoFish 108,200 #5 Posted February 4, 2020 Everyone got a participation award. 1 10 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The Wistman 15,635 #6 Posted February 4, 2020 The Clinton machine that runs the Democratic party is responsible for this, just as they were for the 'Dean scream' when Howard Dean got too close for comfort to winning.. Somebody should ask them. But no reporter/model will. 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
OverSword 56,576 #7 Posted February 4, 2020 Here is what really happened. Biden didn't win, so the DNC is "fixing" the app until it works the way they want it to. 3 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ian hacktorp 5,950 #8 Posted February 4, 2020 Meanwhile, the Trumpenstein monster has broken its shackles and quietly observes the open countryside... 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Space Commander Travis 50,163 #9 Posted February 4, 2020 33 minutes ago, RoofGardener said: The Iowa caucus has been unable to post its results. This is being blamed on a phone app, which refused to function properly on the grounds that there weren't enough 'woke' transgender Palestinians in the voting quorum, so the App voided ALL the votes to prevent White Christians from winning, in accordance with National Democratic Guidelines. Um.. actually.. I might have got that a bit wrong.. But the App failed anyway. So they had to use telephones instead I don't know why that should be such a surprise. You know how much trouble Hillary had with this new-fangled E Mail service. Honestly, it's coming to something when the Republicans (the average age of whose representatives in Congress seems to be about 95) are able to get technology working more satisfactorily than the Democrats with all their pals in Silicon Valley doesn't it. 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ian hacktorp 5,950 #10 Posted February 4, 2020 Good news for the Dems: A fix for the smartphone app has been found and download tools are being rushed to polling sites across Iowa: 7 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RavenHawk 11,433 #11 Posted February 4, 2020 42 minutes ago, XenoFish said: Everyone got a participation award. I was thinking the very same thing. Typical. With everyone declaring victory, they should just apply this to the rest of the season as if any of it will matter. Hilary will step up in a brokered convention only to lose again to Trump. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
XenoFish 108,200 #12 Posted February 4, 2020 I don't get too involved in politics, but every time I see Bernie, I wonder who let him out of the nursing home. 3 1 4 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
joc 18,948 #13 Posted February 4, 2020 ...and poor Pete...He can't get any respect, I tell ya...no respect...not even at his own caucus...a supporter wanted her card back when she found out he was gay! Video 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
OverSword 56,576 #14 Posted February 4, 2020 32 minutes ago, joc said: ...and poor Pete...He can't get any respect, I tell ya...no respect...not even at his own caucus...a supporter wanted her card back when she found out he was gay! Video That's a shame. It really shouldn't make a difference to her. I wonder how many gay people she knows and doesn't even realize it? 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ian hacktorp 5,950 #15 Posted February 4, 2020 Tech Firm Whose Half-Baked App Cocked Up Iowa Results Run By Ex-Clinton, Obama Staff Quote An app developed by a Democratic digital nonprofit group that botched the Iowa caucus results is run by former staffers for Hillary Clinton's 2016 campaign, Obama's presidential campaign, as well as Google, Apple and former DNC employees. https://www.zerohedge.com/political/tech-firm-whose-shadow-app-cocked-iowa-results-run-ex-clinton-obama-staff Hillary and Obama are the 'floaters' the good Dem voters just can't seem to flush. 2 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
President-Elect Acidhead 12,000 #16 Posted February 4, 2020 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RoofGardener 17,379 #17 Posted February 4, 2020 1 hour ago, hacktorp said: Tech Firm Whose Half-Baked App Cocked Up Iowa Results Run By Ex-Clinton, Obama Staff https://www.zerohedge.com/political/tech-firm-whose-shadow-app-cocked-iowa-results-run-ex-clinton-obama-staff Hillary and Obama are the 'floaters' the good Dem voters just can't seem to flush. ROFL.. be cautious with ZeroHedge... they aren't that reliable as a source Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Baz Dane 1,395 #18 Posted February 4, 2020 17 minutes ago, RoofGardener said: ROFL.. be cautious with ZeroHedge... they aren't that reliable as a source How about the LA Times then... App made by Clinton campaign veterans’ firm is behind Iowa caucuses debacle https://www.latimes.com/business/technology/story/2020-02-04/clinton-campaign-vets-behind-2020-iowa-caucus-app-snafu 3 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ian hacktorp 5,950 #19 Posted February 4, 2020 (edited) 31 minutes ago, RoofGardener said: ROFL.. be cautious with ZeroHedge... they aren't that reliable as a source I'm confused. Are you saying the ZH article is unreliable because they heavily cited a Huffington Post article for their facts? Or are you saying you didn't bother to read it in the first place? eta: ROFL Edited February 4, 2020 by hacktorp 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
President-Elect Acidhead 12,000 #20 Posted February 4, 2020 LOL 3 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Space Commander Travis 50,163 #21 Posted February 4, 2020 Best (satirical*) headline about this little technical glitch: Putin Prepares To Release Iowa Caucus Results * (It has to be pointed out for the benefit of the Farmers of this world ) 4 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RoofGardener 17,379 #22 Posted February 4, 2020 (edited) 9 minutes ago, hacktorp said: I'm confused. Are you saying the ZH article is unreliable because they heavily cited a Huffington Post article for their facts? Or are you saying you didn't bother to read it in the first place? Hmm... bit of both, really ? I must admit, I am THOROUGHLY enjoying the Democrats display of technical incompetence. Mind you.. I shouldn't get TOO carried away. The Republicans had problems back in 2012 as well Meanwhile... and I do NOT intend this to gloat over US electoral incompetence (1), the UK never have these problems. Not a hanging - or pregnant - chad in sight (1) Well, when I say I don't intend to gloat, I actually mean that... I intend to gloat Edited February 4, 2020 by RoofGardener 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RoofGardener 17,379 #23 Posted February 4, 2020 9 minutes ago, Dumbledore the Awesome said: Best (satirical*) headline about this little technical glitch: Putin Prepares To Release Iowa Caucus Results * (It has to be pointed out for the benefit of the Farmers of this world ) I bitterly regret that the Unexplained Mysteries website only allows to to post a "laughing" emote ONCE If we had a "post of the month" feature, I would nominate that post for it 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ian hacktorp 5,950 #24 Posted February 4, 2020 1 minute ago, RoofGardener said: Hmm... bit of both, really ? Jack Dorsey's Twitterban of ZH can be seen either as a smudge on ZH's reliability... ...or a sign that ZH often strays a bit too close to the truth on certain subjects. You get to decide. Either way, ZH is immensely popular with seekers of non-MSM news and financial information. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ian hacktorp 5,950 #25 Posted February 4, 2020 Wow...I knew things would get bad for the Dems with all of the finger-pointing and blame-gaming. But not THIS bad! Now we have coastal-Leftist Dems blaming Iowa Dems for the primary fiasco because they are...wait for it...racist! Zerlina Maxwell: Iowa Caucus ‘the Perfect Example of Systemic Racism’ Quote Maxwell said, “The Iowa caucus is essentially the perfect example of systemic racism. Ninety-one percent of the voters in Iowa are white. The reason why you see a drop in turnout, I’m just speculating here, it could be perhaps that white children are not in the cages. So when you are talking about the tangible pain that black and brown people are feeling, they feel a sense of urgency because their kids are being put in cages, right? https://www.breitbart.com/clips/2020/02/04/zerlina-maxwell-iowa-caucus-the-perfect-example-of-systemic-racism/ These fools are driving middle America into the open arms of the Republican party in droves. 1 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites