Archaeology and Bible experts work together to explain the past

[Piney 72,577]

1 minute ago, Manwon Lender said:

When did that happen, today?

The 1990s-early 2000s. When Quakers still had a spine. 

[Manwon Lender 18,072]

8 minutes ago, Piney said:

The 1990s-early 2000s. When Quakers still had a spine. 

That clears thing up my friend, I bet you had your hands full.

[jmccr8 22,102]

2 hours ago, Tom1200 said:

I'm just a little bit worried by (and sceptical of) this exchange of one-upmanship bravado and testosterone...

But to add my tuppenceworth - back in 1945 I was leading a hand-picked squad of Double-O agents in Berlin.  We were targeting a bad guy tagged as AH, so obviously we knew him as A$$Hole.  He was head of a family of evil, racist vampires known as Germans.  They would hide underground by day, emerging at dusk to suck the blood out of entire countries.  So one evening we waited for AH to appear, then we killed him with laser beams from our wristwatches.  Then, just to be sure, we clipped our cigarette cases together to form an atom bomb, inflated the helium balloons in our tuxedos and flew out of there seconds before obliterating central Berlin and every vampire on the planet.  True story.

Hi Tom

 don’t take this the wrong way but I love you 

jmccr8

[jmccr8 22,102]

42 minutes ago, Piney said:

I was the Red Cross fella who just watched people harm and kill each other. Then patched up the ones still breathing.  

I don’t patch up the people I wound is that wrong

jmccr8

[jmccr8 22,102]

2 hours ago, Tom1200 said:

I'm just a little bit worried by (and sceptical of) this exchange of one-upmanship bravado and testosterone...

But to add my tuppenceworth - back in 1945 I was leading a hand-picked squad of Double-O agents in Berlin.  We were targeting a bad guy tagged as AH, so obviously we knew him as A$$Hole.  He was head of a family of evil, racist vampires known as Germans.  They would hide underground by day, emerging at dusk to suck the blood out of entire countries.  So one evening we waited for AH to appear, then we killed him with laser beams from our wristwatches.  Then, just to be sure, we clipped our cigarette cases together to form an atom bomb, inflated the helium balloons in our tuxedos and flew out of there seconds before obliterating central Berlin and every vampire on the planet.  True story.

Hi Tom

Don’t worry I am only a psychopath under certain conditions otherwise I am quite normal c

jmccr8

[Tom1200 1,443]

3 hours ago, Manwon Lender said:

You can do better than that, that's more like a fairytale you would tell the kids before hey go to sleep!!!!!!

We won the war and got loads of medals and stuff, but the project was classified as Top Top TOP Secret so I haven't been allowed to reveal it for 75 years.  (In case any vampires escaped and decided to hunt us down, etc. etc.  Always keep the plot open for a possible sequel...)  

I had the most amazing team.  There was this young Greek naval officer Philip Mountbatten who could swear in twenty different languages but funnily enough couldn't speak a word of Greek.  Then there was the chain-smoking Ian Fleming, also from the navy, because back in those days cigarettes were healthy and made you irresistibly attractive.  His speciality was hiding things in cigarettes, like poison darts or explosives.  There was a grizzled American sergeant Joseph Robinette Biden Jr, an expert in confusing the enemy with elaborate nonsensical arguments - we always knew he would go far in politics.  For equality we had some Soviet birds who could bench-press 250 kg and were probably men anyway.  And for technical backup we had Albert Einstein, and the aging Nick Tesla who had faked his own death two years previously, just to be part of the squad.  (Possible prequel plot here?)

Sadly all these great people are now deceased, even me, so I am finally allowed to reveal the truth.

[Harte 18,637]

20 hours ago, Hanslune said:

Yes but that was just hammering a nail into a wooden thingy to mark a enemy killed - but still one of my  favorite Howard stories

 

Oh and here it is for those unfortunate pmrd who may not have read it.

https://www.gutenberg.org/files/32759/32759-h/32759-h.htm

This etext was produced from Weird Tales July, August-September and October 1936

I had the wrong story. In fact, it only happened in the movie.

However, Conan WAS nailed to a cross in "A Witch Shall Be Born," but someone else cut it down and pulled out the nails for him.

But here's what he did when the vultures came for him while he was still nailed on:

Harte

 

[Hanslune 14,440]

1 hour ago, Harte said:

I had the wrong story. In fact, it only happened in the movie.

However, Conan WAS nailed to a cross in "A Witch Shall Be Born," but someone else cut it down and pulled out the nails for him.

But here's what he did when the vultures came for him while he was still nailed on:

Harte

 

Oh, yeah another Howard special effect. I remember that part well. I've never looked the same at vultures since. I did something similar in a supermarket (with a package of chicken necks) and was asked to leave.

[Windowpane 1,907]

Instructions on how to rescue someone in this predicament:

Quote

With a grunt of approval Djebal bent over him with a pair of pincers used to draw horse-shoe nails, and gripped the head of the spike in Conan's right hand, tearing the skin to get a grip on the deeply embedded head. The pincers were small for that work. Djebal sweated and tugged, swearing and wrestling with the stubborn iron, working it back and forth—in swollen flesh as well as in wood. Blood started, oozing over the Cimmerian's fingers. He lay so still he might have been dead, except for the spasmodic rise and fall of his great chest. The spike gave way, and Djebal held up the blood-stained thing with a grunt of satisfaction, then flung it away and bent over the other.

The process was repeated, and then Djebal turned his attention to Conan's skewered feet. But the Cimmerian, struggling up to a sitting posture, wrenched the pincers from his fingers and sent him staggering backward with a violent shove. Conan's hands were swollen to almost twice their normal size. His fingers felt like misshapen thumbs, and closing his hands was an agony that brought blood streaming from under his grinding teeth. But somehow, clutching the pincers clumsily with both hands, he managed to wrench out first one spike and then the other. They were not driven so deeply into the wood as the others had been.

 

[Thanos5150 679]

2 hours ago, Harte said:

I had the wrong story. In fact, it only happened in the movie.

However, Conan WAS nailed to a cross in "A Witch Shall Be Born," but someone else cut it down and pulled out the nails for him.

But here's what he did when the vultures came for him while he was still nailed on:

Harte

 

 

[Trelane 3,315]

7 hours ago, Tom1200 said:

I'm just a little bit worried by (and sceptical of) this exchange of one-upmanship bravado and testosterone...

But to add my tuppenceworth - back in 1945 I was leading a hand-picked squad of Double-O agents in Berlin.  We were targeting a bad guy tagged as AH, so obviously we knew him as A$$Hole.  He was head of a family of evil, racist vampires known as Germans.  They would hide underground by day, emerging at dusk to suck the blood out of entire countries.  So one evening we waited for AH to appear, then we killed him with laser beams from our wristwatches.  Then, just to be sure, we clipped our cigarette cases together to form an atom bomb, inflated the helium balloons in our tuxedos and flew out of there seconds before obliterating central Berlin and every vampire on the planet.  True story.

No need for worry or skepticism.

 

[Piney 72,577]

4 hours ago, Tom1200 said:

Sadly all these great people are now deceased, even me, so I am finally allowed to reveal the truth.

I saw the Daily Express feature where you worked with Modesty Blaise and Jason Love. 

[Kenemet 11,375]

20 hours ago, Earl.Of.Trumps said:

Ok, so any relationship between the name Jesus and Joshua is simply mythical? I mean if Joshua existed 600 yeas before Jesus, 
then we know Joshua was not invented with Jesus in mind. Not sure about Jesus being/not being a latter day Joshua though. Thanks

No to either option.

In antiquity, the literate cultures we know of had a limited number of acceptable names.  No one hunted up weird syllable combinations for a kid's name, and all names had some sort of meaning to them.  "Jesus/Jeshu/Jeshua" was a popular boy's name for a thousand years before the Bible was written and there were undoubtedly hundreds of men with that name in the Middle East at the time of his reported birth. 

Wikipedia goes into the etymology of the name here: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jesus#Etymology