Blame

[the13bats]

You likely know i really do not haunt religion selections but im curious how others see it, both believers in a God and non believers.

I know a somwhat famous musician ive booked him a few times,

I was reading an interview where i guess the person assumed he was atheist and asked him if he believed in God,

He replied and i paraphase to the effect, hell yes he believed in God and even prayed daily, he would wake up say thanks for another day being alive and then ask God not to do anything really F ed up to him that day.

My OCD then has me recall in the lethal weapon movie there is a back and forth where dan asks in dry humor why god would do that to him,  what did he do to make God hate him. Mel snaps, hate him right back works for me.

In a Riddick film the guy says a baby born tossed in a dumpster cord around his neck, yeah, he believes in God and hate the $%^&

That hit me, blaming God for bad things happening must be a common idea ive never blamed anything or anyone for the bad things i just figure its all part of life, as life gets harder and things get worse i wouldnt say i want to blame anyone/anything except perhaps myself for how things are i do question why a bit.

Im curious how others view the bad in their lives do you assign blame?

[SHaYap]

Something that was etched in my mind since I was a wee Lad...

Quote

“I do not believe in a fate that falls on men however they act; but I do believe in a fate that falls on them unless they act.”

 

— Buddha

...

https://sourcesofinsight.com › budd...

The Best Buddha Quotes for Peace and Happiness - Sources of Insight

22 Jan 2012 — Buddha quotes to make you think and bring a smile to your ... “I do not believe in a fate that falls on men however they act; ...

~

[XenoFish]

6 minutes ago, the13bats said:

Im curious how others view the bad in their lives do you assign blame?

Cause and effect pretty much. We are all surrounded by a series of events quite often beyond our control. One little butterfly fart and the planet explodes.

God can be a scapegoat for all the bad stuff, so can the 'devil' for that matter. I guess when you pray and expect certain results, which do not happen in accordance to whatever you desire. God becomes the jerk. 

[Duke Wellington]

3 minutes ago, the13bats said:

You likely know i really do not haunt religion selections but im curious how others see it, both believers in a God and non believers.

I know a somwhat famous musician ive booked him a few times,

I was reading an interview where i guess the person assumed he was atheist and asked him if he believed in God,

He replied and i paraphase to the effect, hell yes he believed in God and even prayed daily, he would wake up say thanks for another day being alive and then ask God not to do anything really F ed up to him that day.

My OCD then has me recall in the lethal weapon movie there is a back and forth where dan asks in dry humor why god would do that to him,  what did he do to make God hate him. Mel snaps, hate him right back works for me.

In a Riddick film the guy says a baby born tossed in a dumpster cord around his neck, yeah, he believes in God and hate the $%^&

That hit me, blaming God for bad things happening must be a common idea ive never blamed anything or anyone for the bad things i just figure its all part of life, as life gets harder and things get worse i wouldnt say i want to blame anyone/anything except perhaps myself for how things are i do question why a bit.

Im curious how others view the bad in their lives do you assign blame?

I dont agree with the Christian narrative that God is wholly good and therefore the evil in the world is the result of man.

I see God as neither good, or evil, or both, but as creating a world in which both exist, and with both being used by God to do work on our minds to get us to where we need to be. That is reunifying us back into God.

So the question is where is that place? Well lets look at the messed up experiences we have in life that we see as evil. Lets say we get run over and loose both of our legs. That could severally do a persons head in. They might get down about it and sink into the abyss. Or they might compartmentalise it where they put it out of their minds and focus on enjoying what they can in life.

Lets look at the good experiences in life. Lets say we win the lottery. Is it a good experience or does it come with negative catches? Maybe we loose our friends who turn on us for being wealthy. Maybe we get robbed. Maybe we end up bored out of our minds when we dont have to work ever again. While these negatives wouldn`t cause us to sink into an abyss they would be irritating never the less. Maybe after a large amount of irritation we decide to stop thinking about the negatives and enjoy our wealthy life to the maximum.

Where this conversation is going is the elimination of all thought. Through our experiences we adopt no thought in various aspects of our lives so that we can enjoy the positive side of life and carry on. One life isn`t going to contain all negative possible experiences, that might require coming back 1001 times. But after coming back 1001 times we would have experienced the negative associated with every single experience and as a result learned to eliminate all thought.

God is no thought, thought creates, creation has negatives. So we reunify with God by going back to no thought. It is hard as it is against our nature, our minds constantly want to have thoughts in relation to life sucking us in. This is what ego is in religion. But the work being done on us throughout our lives makes us (even if we have to be dragged there kicking and screaming) eliminate thoughts.

This is the point of most religions and mysticisms from Buddhism to Sufism.

Until we have eliminated all thought, because thoughts creates we come back. We come back for another kick in, to loose another set of thoughts. And the genius of it all is that it doesnt matter whether someone believes in God or not, whether someone resists or learns quickly, its getting done to us whether we like it or not.

[+Desertrat56]

Perspective is what it is about, do you get disappointed at every proof that the world does not revolve around you, do you need to blame someone?   It seems like the more egocentric someone is the more they blame others or god or the devil or fate or their parents etc.   I am watching a tv show called Shitts Creek and the rich kids are upset that they don't have their big house any more and they have to work if they want money.   They blame and whine to people who would be their friends who have nothing compared to what the rich kids still have.   I think that is the theme of the show, and it certainly points out how perspective is key to whether you blame god, the devil or another human for you circumstances, whether you made the choices that got you there or not.  

 

[papageorge1]

39 minutes ago, the13bats said:

Im curious how others view the bad in their lives do you assign blame?

I try to take a spiritual view and find my permanent peace in the realization that the big picture is beyond good/bad events on the physical level. Help what we can and accept what we can not change. 

Blaming God or other people is only going to make things worse. The goal of life for me is to be happy, content, loving and peaceful no matter the ups and downs of physical plane life. So we are given this challenging environment to learn that lesson. Eternal internal bliss is the victory no man or events can take away. That's total and final victory!

Actually what I said is also part of Buddhism 101.

Edited May 20, 2021 by papageorge1

[the13bats]

32 minutes ago, Xeno-Fish said:

Cause and effect pretty much. We are all surrounded by a series of events quite often beyond our control. One little butterfly fart and the planet explodes.

God can be a scapegoat for all the bad stuff, so can the 'devil' for that matter. I guess when you pray and expect certain results, which do not happen in accordance to whatever you desire. God becomes the jerk. 

I was hoping for your opinion.

From childhood i never grasped praying for something being much different to blowing out candles on a bday cake or tossing a coin in a well,

I still cant grasp if there is a God of the type one prays to to receive something why would a person be arrogant to the point of thinking this God will change the entire universe to give that person what they prayed for, i see claims of special magical paranormal powers about the same.

Ive known some very deeply religious people who had really bad things happen when i questioned it they gave me the, its god will bigger picture lecture, which it very well might be.

Ah, "scapegoat" perhaps thats it right there, a rotten thing happens the person didnt think they deserved it perhaps they didnt deserve it so they have to blame something someone, something must carry the fault.

 

[Duke Wellington]

11 minutes ago, Desertrat56 said:

Perspective is what it is about, do you get disappointed at every proof that the world does not revolve around you, do you need to blame someone?   It seems like the more egocentric someone is the more they blame others or god or the devil or fate or their parents etc.   I am watching a tv show called Shitts Creek and the rich kids are upset that they don't have their big house any more and they have to work if they want money.   They blame and whine to people who would be their friends who have nothing compared to what the rich kids still have.   I think that is the theme of the show, and it certainly points out how perspective is key to whether you blame god, the devil or another human for you circumstances, whether you made the choices that got you there or not.  

To add to this blame is a little thing we engage in to make ourselves feel better.

We want to feel good about ourselves, and the only way to actually get there is to learn to be happy in ourselves rather than trying to drag down others who we see as being unfairly favoured in life. Or where actual grievances exist, moving on from them.

Blame doesnt solve anything, it just temporarily makes us feel good before we are reminded of it all then we are back to a negative state of mind and back to blaming. The escape route is not remaining in this circle.

Its to accept there is a negative side to life, accept that it is always going to exist regardless of anything we can do about it, and let go of it. Stop thinking about the negative, move on.

Edited May 20, 2021 by Cookie Monster

[XenoFish]

2 minutes ago, the13bats said:

I was hoping for your opinion.

From childhood i never grasped praying for something being much different to blowing out candles on a bday cake or tossing a coin in a well,

I still cant grasp if there is a God of the type one prays to to receive something why would a person be arrogant to the point of thinking this God will change the entire universe to give that person what they prayed for, i see claims of special magical paranormal powers about the same.

Ive known some very deeply religious people who had really bad things happen when i questioned it they gave me the, its god will bigger picture lecture, which it very well might be.

Ah, "scapegoat" perhaps thats it right there, a rotten thing happens the person didnt think they deserved it perhaps they didnt deserve it so they have to blame something someone, something must carry the fault.

 

A lot of it comes down to a feeling of control. With a prayer, ritual, or spell, people feel like they have some causal power over the world around them. It took something I don't want to think of to break me out of such magical thinking. A little magical thinking isn't too bad, it's the obsession and excessive expectations around it. 

So I can blame others and I can also blame myself. It is all in how I act and react to whatever situation I'm in. Good things happen, bad things happen. It's all chaos to me.

[XenoFish]

5 minutes ago, Cookie Monster said:

Its to accept there is a negative side to life, accept that exists regardless of anything we can do about it, and let go of it. Stop thinking about the negative.

Just curious, how do you breath with your head buried in the sand all the time?

[the13bats]

13 minutes ago, Desertrat56 said:

Perspective is what it is about, do you get disappointed at every proof that the world does not revolve around you, do you need to blame someone?   It seems like the more egocentric someone is the more they blame others or god or the devil or fate or their parents etc.   I am watching a tv show called Shitts Creek and the rich kids are upset that they don't have their big house any more and they have to work if they want money.   They blame and whine to people who would be their friends who have nothing compared to what the rich kids still have.   I think that is the theme of the show, and it certainly points out how perspective is key to whether you blame god, the devil or another human for you circumstances, whether you made the choices that got you there or not.  

 

Yeah, i binge watched that show, thing was none of the um, "non rich" people ever that i recall called them out for being soiled snobs

Remember the movie trading places, when louis is whining soiled to opeila she does tell him how it is.

I never thought the world orbited me i did wonder who it orbits, and im not wanting to blame just getting a bit overwhelmed and asking why bad is outweighing good.

[the13bats]

13 minutes ago, Cookie Monster said:

Stop thinking about the negative, move on

If you have a murder hornet fly up your nose is it all that easy to not consider it?

If you are barefoot standing in a fire ant mound is it so easy to ignore them?

You are at a place i likely will never reach.

[XenoFish]

6 minutes ago, the13bats said:

im not wanting to blame just getting a bit overwhelmed and asking why bad is outweighing good.

Because bad seems to be our default settings. We are basically just selfish creatures. Doing pretty much every thing out of self-interest. 

[the13bats]

24 minutes ago, papageorge1 said:

I try to take a spiritual view and find my permanent peace in the realization that the big picture is beyond good/bad events on the physical level. Help what we can and accept what we can not change. 

Blaming God or other people is only going to make things worse. The goal of life for me is to be happy, content, loving and peaceful no matter the ups and downs of physical plane life. So we are given this challenging environment to learn that lesson. Eternal internal bliss is the victory no man or events can take away. That's total and final victory!

Actually what I said is also part of Buddhism 101.

As i said i do not blame but was questioning both why things bad happen so much to some over others and why some blame,

And when we pass on it is over regardless of ones beliefs.

[XenoFish]

1 minute ago, the13bats said:

You are at a place i likely will never reach.

You don't want to be there. It's blinding. Can't see the forest for the trees, but the forest is on fire and you can't see the flames or smell the smoke. That's how I see that mindset. Not a reality tunnel I personally want.

[the13bats]

5 minutes ago, Xeno-Fish said:

Because bad seems to be our default settings. We are basically just selfish creatures. Doing pretty much every thing out of self-interest. 

So you are saying most people do ask for, cause and deserve any bad things in their lives?

[Duke Wellington]

1 minute ago, Xeno-Fish said:

Just curious, how do you breath with your head buried in the sand all the time?

Come on, dont be like that.

I think there is one thing everyone can agree on and that is we all want to feel good about ourselves and to be happy dont we?

So it might be a tumble weed moment but we seek to derive feeling good and happy from our life experiences, yet life has negative experiences. The paradox is simple when we allow ourselves to see it.

So feeling good about ourselves and happy comes from elsewhere. Its like people who need approval off others discovering that not everyone approves of them, so they cannot win playing that game. They have to learn to stop deriving their self-worth from the opinions of others.

It is all about our minds. We have to learn to manage our minds, and when we learn to manage them we feel good and happy. We make a positive list, we make a negative list, and we say right I`m going to stop worrying and thinking about everything on the negative list. It isn`t constructive, it doesnt get me anywhere, it just puts me in a negative state of mind stopping me from feeling good about myself and happy.

[XenoFish]

Just now, Cookie Monster said:

Come on, dont be like that.

I think there is one thing everyone can agree on and that is we all want to feel good about ourselves and to be happy dont we?

So it might be a tumble weed moment but we seek to derive feeling good and happy from our life experiences, yet life has negative experiences. The paradox is simple when we allow ourselves to see it.

So feeling good about ourselves and happy comes from elsewhere. Its like people who need approval off others discovering that not everyone approves of them, so they cannot win playing that game. They have to learn to stop deriving their self-worth from the opinions of others.

It is all about our minds. We have to learn to manage our minds, and when we learn to manage them we feel good and happy. We make a positive list, we make a negative list, and we say right I`m going to stop worrying and thinking about everything on the negative list. It isn`t constructive, it doesnt get me anywhere, it just puts me in a negative state of mind stopping me from feeling good about myself and happy.

You're a hedonist who (by your own admission) treats people horribly so yeah. Focus on the positive act as the negative I suppose. That's what your god wants right? 

I'd rather not drown myself in pain killers just to ignore a toothache. I'd rather deal with it. 

[Duke Wellington]

11 minutes ago, the13bats said:

If you have a murder hornet fly up your nose is it all that easy to not consider it?

If you are barefoot standing in a fire ant mound is it so easy to ignore them?

You are at a place i likely will never reach.

When the hornet is gone, or you step off the ant mound, what do you do?

Do you say that was painful, oh well, then move on. Or do you think about it for days, weeks, months, even years afterwards? I think most of us would probably move on from it. Yet with various negative experiences people dont, and it drives them up the wall because they dont.

The harshest negative experience you can have in your life is the greatest moment of your life when you figure out you can move on from it. Once you figure it out you realise you can deal with anything. You realise that nothing else negative in your life is ever going to bother you in the same way again. You realise it is the act of fixating on something that drove you up the wall, and you simply can stop thinking about it.

Negative experiences we cannot move on reveal work we need to do in managing our minds.

Edited May 20, 2021 by Cookie Monster

[XenoFish]

4 minutes ago, the13bats said:

So you are saying most people do ask for, cause and deserve any bad things in their lives?

What I'm saying is that we're all motivated by what we wish and desire. This can have a good and bad effect on our lives. However, everyone does this. So if John Doe decided to get sloppy drunk tonight and he drives home going way to fast, and I encounter him at 6 am. He hits me and puts me in the hospital, did I deserve that? In someone's eyes probably, but it's just cause and effect. We have an insane amount of things that are going on around us. I do not know the end results of what I do, I do not know the results of what others do. I don't even know how such things will affect me now, tomorrow, or 10 years from now. All I do know is that there are "intersection points" where things happen. 

[XenoFish]

1 minute ago, Cookie Monster said:

When the hornet is gone, or you step off the ant mound, what do you do?

Do you say that was painful, oh well, then move on. Or do you think about it for days, weeks, months, even years afterwards? I think most of us would probably move on from it. Yet with various negative experiences people dont, and it drives them up the wall because they dont.

The harshest negative experience you can have in your life is the greatest moment of your life when you figure out you can move on from it. Once you figure it out you realise you can deal with anything. You realise that nothing else negative in your life is ever going to bother you in the same way again. You realise it is the act of fixating on something that drove you up the wall, and you simply can stop thinking about it.

You must've had a very soft life. 

[Duke Wellington]

6 minutes ago, Xeno-Fish said:

You must've had a very soft life. 

Not at all, I have had my own fair share of negatives just like everyone else.

Why else would any of us be here? If we were the finished product there would be no need for this life. None of us are your enemy, we are all in it, while the negatives vary from person to person, we all get them.

Edited May 20, 2021 by Cookie Monster

[XenoFish]

2 minutes ago, Cookie Monster said:

Not at all, I have had my own fair share of negatives just like everyone else.

Why else would any of us be here?

I've got psychological scars from mine. Even now if I ignored the negative of my gut issues, I'd probably already be dead. No, I fully acknowledge that I have the very same health issue that killed my grandmother. So yeah, you can keep your happy go luck attitude. I'll say grounded in the real. 

[Duke Wellington]

Just now, Xeno-Fish said:

I've got psychological scars from mine. Even now if I ignored the negative of my gut issues, I'd probably already be dead. No, I fully acknowledge that I have the very same health issue that killed my grandmother. So yeah, you can keep your happy go luck attitude. I'll say grounded in the real. 

Well your journey will take you where ever it will.

If you stumble on how to mentally move on from it, please share, you might end up with a different set of insights.

[XenoFish]

Just now, Cookie Monster said:

Well your journey will take you where ever it will.

If you stumble on how to mentally move on from it, please share, you might end up with a different set of insights.

You don't get it. I am fully aware of all that can go wrong. The only direction I have is forward. Positive thinking didn't get me there, ignoring the problem didn't get me there. Facing my own hell did. I didn't bury my head in the sand. I know full well what will happen if I do not acknowledge the negative. I'll probably bleed out like my grandmother did on the toilet when her intestinal ruptured. You see, without knowing the negative and doing something about it, you can not make things better. When you ignore the negative it becomes a subconscious wound that festers, growing worse and worse till you can't ignore it. 

Do you ever think about the results of how you treat your coworkers? You are the cause and what exactly is the effect? Have those energy drinks and coffee's you chug been good for your health? What other indulgences have your partaken in that have a negative effect on you? Do you every really think about the cause and effect you create?