Christmas for the Lost

[Guyver]

Greetings.  So, as we all are most likely aware, Christmas is approaching.  This will be my second year of having accepted the fact that I don’t believe in Jesus anymore, so Christmas is nothing to me.  In fact, theologically it’s kind of depressing to me.  Call me Grinch if you want to, but the truth is I do find myself having difficulty celebrating this holiday in any religious sense.  So, my question is…..with Christmas so prevalent and widespread, what is a lost soul supposed to do during Christmas time?

[Guyver]

Answer.  Enjoy the parties and the time off from work - obviously.  I mean aside from that. Try to help your fellow man, do nothing, sacrifice a goat?

[psyche101]

4 minutes ago, Guyver said:

Answer.  Enjoy the parties and the time off from work - obviously.  I mean aside from that. Try to help your fellow man, do nothing, sacrifice a goat?

Enjoy that there is a public holiday for families to gather, friends to catch up, and take a well earned break. 

Even Richard Dawkins celebrates Christmas.

https://richarddawkins.net/2013/12/why-its-okay-for-atheists-to-celebrate-christmas/

 

 

 

Edited December 15, 2021 by psyche101

[Guyver]

Here’s one of my many problems with the celebration of Christmas- the gift giving.  Everybody needs to get a gift, we’ve all got to get out there and just get those gifts.  A religious or spiritual practice?  Hmmmn.  Anyway, last year I decided that even though I didn’t believe in Christmas, I was going to use it as an excuse to really do some great things for my wife, a person I truly love and respect.  So, I start with metacognition.  I begin to think as I think she would be pleased.  I get all these great gifts on my own including a very sentimental thing, I check with her friends, get ideas - few of them I liked BTW - but some I did like and did use.  Long story short, during this lengthy gift exchange deal with just close family, she finds cause to criticize one of my gifts.  Well, I didn’t show it at the time, but that really p***ed me off, and truthfully did hurt my feelings.  Call me a wuss if it please you, but damn it, I’m just telling the truth.

Anyway, this year I said screw it, I’m not doing Christmas.  I don’t wish to give or receive gifts, and if anyone wants to get me anything, give to a charity.  So, I informed my wife about it and asked that we discuss it, and it came to one big gift that we both know for sure we both want….and the stockings.  So, that was the agreement I got because I complained that my wife insulted me by complaining about a gift I gave with good intentions.  FWIW.

[psyche101]

7 minutes ago, Guyver said:

Here’s one of my many problems with the celebration of Christmas- the gift giving.  Everybody needs to get a gift, we’ve all got to get out there and just get those gifts.  A religious or spiritual practice?  Hmmmn.  Anyway, last year I decided that even though I didn’t believe in Christmas, I was going to use it as an excuse to really do some great things for my wife, a person I truly love and respect.  So, I start with metacognition.  I begin to think as I think she would be pleased.  I get all these great gifts on my own including a very sentimental thing, I check with her friends, get ideas - few of them I liked BTW - but some I did like and did use.  Long story short, during this lengthy gift exchange deal with just close family, she finds cause to criticize one of my gifts.  Well, I didn’t show it at the time, but that really p***ed me off, and truthfully did hurt my feelings.  Call me a wuss if it please you, but damn it, I’m just telling the truth.

Anyway, this year I said screw it, I’m not doing Christmas.  I don’t wish to give or receive gifts, and if anyone wants to get me anything, give to a charity.  So, I informed my wife about it and asked that we discuss it, and it came to one big gift that we both know for sure we both want….and the stockings.  So, that was the agreement I got because I complained that my wife insulted me by complaining about a gift I gave with good intentions.  FWIW.

I've had a very similar experience in my past. I get where you are coming from. It's supposed to be about the thought. When it's not, it's terrible. Heartbreaking. You go to all this trouble, save your pennies, and then the anticipation of opening the present all to be let down by a , I don't want this, it's stupid. 

So I make it about the experience ever since. I don't usually buy presents that are things but experiences. Whale watching. Hot air balloon rides. Presents don't always last forever, but memories do, and like a fine wine often age well. 

Edited December 15, 2021 by psyche101

[Guyver]

According to my religious beliefs, I’d be goddamned if I spent my hard earned money buying a gift for someone who doesn’t want it or appreciate it.

[psyche101]

9 minutes ago, Guyver said:

According to my religious beliefs, I’d be goddamned if I spent my hard earned money buying a gift for someone who doesn’t want it or appreciate it.

Atheism is freedom.

You're allowed to enjoy stuff without an excuse.

Edited December 15, 2021 by psyche101

[Guyver]

10 minutes ago, psyche101 said:

I've had a very similar experience in my past. I get where you are coming from. It's supposed to be about the thought. When it's not, it's terrible. Heartbreaking. You go to all this trouble, save your pennies, and then the anticipation of opening the present all to be let down by a , I don't want this, it's stupid. 

So I make it about the experience ever since. I don't usually buy presents that are things but experiences. Whale watching. Hot air balloon rides. Presents don't always last forever, but memories do, and like a fine wine often age well. 

You are wise. Well spoken.

[Guyver]

1 minute ago, psyche101 said:

Atheism is freedom.

You're allowed to enjoy stuff without an excuse.

Sigh.  Problem is I’m not atheist.  I believe in something but I don’t know what it is.  TBH, right now, I’m leaning to the simulation hypothesis.

[psyche101]

1 minute ago, Guyver said:

Sigh.  Problem is I’m not atheist.  I believe in something but I don’t know what it is.  TBH, right now, I’m leaning to the simulation hypothesis.

I honestly think of you were to study cosmology deeper that would change. I see so much in your posting that would be resolved by natural order. I understand your adherence to faith and don't impress upon you too much because I have no interest in changing your choice. But personally, I think it would bring you peace.

There's more reasons to accept a natural universe than there is to keep insisting something or other created it.

And it's even more impressive. 

 

[jmccr8]

The only thing about Christmas for me is my daughter and grand-daughter as a time to share together. For many decades I worked most holidays so none of them mean much to me personally, I don't put up a tree there are plenty of live ones outside that I would rather see live a full life without sacrifice. I won't work the holiday this year and may have a rum Olympics and bud fest.

[onlookerofmayhem]

Hey @Guyver,

As an individual who doesn't celebrate, well, pretty much anything I feel for you.

Holidays designated by any individual or group mean absolutely nothing to me.

I try to be a thoughtful, giving and all around nice guy all year long.

I get my friends and relatives gifts and help them out whenever I can.

I find it terrible that some people only find that one day a year is sufficient to feel they have something to celebrate a certain thing.

Like Mother's Day, for example. I'm of the mind that, if she's still alive I should treat my mom well and do things when I can. Mother's Day is meaningless in my world.

As for Christmas, my best friend and his wife have three kids now. Neither parent believes in god or Jesus. Yet they put up the tree, decorate the house and tell the kids the whole rigmarole about Santa, his elves and reindeer.

I have no issue with this. I don't tell the kids Santa doesn't exist. I don't berate my friends for their choices. I play along with whatever happens to come up.

It seems some Christians would like to have a monopoly on Christmas, which I think is ridiculous. 

Long story short, enjoy the holidays and the people you love and care for.

Whichever way you choose to celebrate or not, I hope you find a way to enjoy it without beating yourself up too much about how you may have done so in the past. 

[Doug1066]

1 hour ago, Guyver said:

Greetings.  So, as we all are most likely aware, Christmas is approaching.  This will be my second year of having accepted the fact that I don’t believe in Jesus anymore, so Christmas is nothing to me.  In fact, theologically it’s kind of depressing to me.  Call me Grinch if you want to, but the truth is I do find myself having difficulty celebrating this holiday in any religious sense.  So, my question is…..with Christmas so prevalent and widespread, what is a lost soul supposed to do during Christmas time?

One can simply redefine the holiday as a day to celebrate family.

I kind of had to do that when my family became a Buddhist, an atheist, a liberal Quaker and an agnostic (who occasionally attends meeting).

Merry Christmas.

Doug

P.S.:  Put a Star of David on your outdoor Christmas tree and watch the nieghbor's reactions.

Doug

[Guyver]

12 minutes ago, Doug1066 said:

One can simply redefine the holiday as a day to celebrate family.

I kind of had to do that when my family became a Buddhist, an atheist, a liberal Quaker and an agnostic (who occasionally attends meeting).

Merry Christmas.

Doug

P.S.:  Put a Star of David on your outdoor Christmas tree and watch the nieghbor's reactions.

Doug

That’s great.  But, what if your family is all effed up?

[+Sherapy]

1 hour ago, Guyver said:

Greetings.  So, as we all are most likely aware, Christmas is approaching.  This will be my second year of having accepted the fact that I don’t believe in Jesus anymore, so Christmas is nothing to me.  In fact, theologically it’s kind of depressing to me.  Call me Grinch if you want to, but the truth is I do find myself having difficulty celebrating this holiday in any religious sense.  So, my question is…..with Christmas so prevalent and widespread, what is a lost soul supposed to do during Christmas time?

Maybe, Enjoy your wife make the day something special for you two. Sean and I love to go to Catalina because it is almost like having the island to ourselves Xmas isn’t busy at all. We just enjoy our time together. This year I am going to work Xmas to give a caregiver the day off. The joy I get from knowing my CG friend can go be with her family is magical to me. What did you do your first year of no Xmas? 

[+Razman]

I don't ever celebrate christmas in a religious way.

[Guyver]

2 minutes ago, razman said:

I don't ever celebrate christmas in a religious way.

How do you avoid it?

[+Razman]

Just now, Guyver said:

How do you avoid it?

I don't know , but i think i haven't thought of it in a religious way since i was a kid and heard the stories about Bethlehem and stuff. Once i grew older that just faded. It is more of a family time to get together.

[XenoFish]

I call it giftmas for a reason. At this point I personally care little for any holiday. Including my favorite, Halloween. 

[XenoFish]

1 hour ago, Guyver said:

Sigh.  Problem is I’m not atheist.  I believe in something but I don’t know what it is.  TBH, right now, I’m leaning to the simulation hypothesis.

Why believe anything? 

[psyche101]

50 minutes ago, Guyver said:

That’s great.  But, what if your family is all effed up?

Dude...... most are.

That's why they only catch up at Xmas. 

[Guyver]

44 minutes ago, XenoFish said:

Why believe anything? 

Best question ever.  The answer is experience.  Are you experienced?  If you are then you exist.

[Grim Reaper 6]

2 hours ago, Guyver said:

Greetings.  So, as we all are most likely aware, Christmas is approaching.  This will be my second year of having accepted the fact that I don’t believe in Jesus anymore, so Christmas is nothing to me.  In fact, theologically it’s kind of depressing to me.  Call me Grinch if you want to, but the truth is I do find myself having difficulty celebrating this holiday in any religious sense.  So, my question is…..with Christmas so prevalent and widespread, what is a lost soul supposed to do during Christmas time?

Well, I suppose you could use the holiday for a time to be thankful for what you have. You don’t need to be spiritual or believe in any religion to do that. December is the end of another year, and January is a new beginning so throw the theology away. You also apparently have a child, so for them Christmas may still be an important day, depending upon their age. Just look at all you have and be thankful for it and think of what you must change to make the lives of family better in the coming year, that’s about all anyone can do, and nothing is more important!

[Hawken]

@Guyver I see Christmas as a winter holiday where families get together, socialize, have a dinner and exchange gifts.

Since you don't believe in Jesus. I take that you don't believe in Santa either since he's make believe also and spare

your children the grief that you would eventually have to tell them the truth when they get older.

[XenoFish]

17 minutes ago, Guyver said:

Best question ever.  The answer is experience.  Are you experienced?  If you are then you exist.

Doesn't mean I need to believe in something.