Claira Posted November 11, 2024 #51 Share Posted November 11, 2024 3 minutes ago, bmk1245 said: She exprirnced some hunger during WWII, so her sick obsession with the food may stem from her childhood The people I've known who experienced hunger during WWII were food hoarders. They would stock up on everything like they were expecting the apocalypse and would panic the minute they started to run out of something. So your mother's obsession with food may indeed stem from that. 5 minutes ago, bmk1245 said: Anyway, found optimal way to deal with her bs, though don't know how long it will last: once she is starting to wind herself up with usual bs, I excuse myself, and leave "to attend some business" for couple hours. . Alone she calms down, and upon my return she almost normal. Basically, I'm with her 2 to 4 hours in the morning (depends on when she wakes up) up to 12:00, then taking the break till 14:00, then spending 2,3 hours together, then again the break, and spending time with her from 18:00 till she goes to sleep (latest 21:00). As there is almost winter, days are short, so she tends to go to sleep earlier (couple of days even at ~19:00). Are seniors entitled to government paid caregivers in your country? You must be both physically and mentally exhausted by now. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bmk1245 Posted November 14, 2024 Author #52 Share Posted November 14, 2024 (edited) On 11/11/2024 at 8:11 PM, Claira said: The people I've known who experienced hunger during WWII were food hoarders. They would stock up on everything like they were expecting the apocalypse and would panic the minute they started to run out of something. So your mother's obsession with food may indeed stem from that. [...] Yes, that is, with high certainty, the case. On 11/11/2024 at 8:11 PM, Claira said: [...] Are seniors entitled to government paid caregivers in your country? You must be both physically and mentally exhausted by now. Well, wheels of bureaucracy are turning quite slow, nevertheless, I figured out how to manage her quirks and mine, so its manageable - she has fun time and I have resting time))) Who would have guessed she likes watching snooker))) For some reason, nature channels aren't much interesting for her no more, despite her being nature buff, so... What I found she is relaxed watching snooker, watches all sorts of martial fights, extreme sports, etc. So far, its all OK. Schedule works. Edit to add: sumo fights, I'd say, are her favorites after snooker))) Edited November 14, 2024 by bmk1245 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bmk1245 Posted November 14, 2024 Author #53 Share Posted November 14, 2024 Holy crap... She was so overwhelmed with the fight with TV set cables, she already went to sleep, ain't 17:00 (5:00pm) yet... Anyway, wake up call at 18:00 (6:00pm), food and pills and more puzzles and snooker, old hag.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bmk1245 Posted November 14, 2024 Author #54 Share Posted November 14, 2024 In advance, cover any LEDs with cloth, any point light may trigger total disassembly of wiring. Camera IR lights may shine red, turn camera to day mode. TV set (box/wifi) has lights - cover it with cloth, But thats just basics.... Anyway.... Life is good. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bmk1245 Posted November 15, 2024 Author #55 Share Posted November 15, 2024 Have to stew, bit, so speeketh... Mom wonders rooms, and efecd up camera (gone dead)... Kinda funny, still have mental faculties to rip all cables))) 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bmk1245 Posted December 1, 2024 Author #56 Share Posted December 1, 2024 Strict daily schedule helps, and physical 'exhaustion' as well. Two times per day 1km walking (optimal), plus exercise with 1kg dumbbells... Though, when weather changes (pressure low to high, or high to low), some night circuses happen... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bmk1245 Posted December 11, 2024 Author #57 Share Posted December 11, 2024 Another quirk, she remembers plenty of poems (lithuanian and russian), so I persuade her to write it down ... Oh, wow.... If my long term memory would be that perfect in my 92's.... Also, she wrote greeting cards for incoming New Year for her relatives. Another 'Oh, wow'... She's calligraphy master! Damn, my hand writings looks like drunken chicken found the piece of paper, hers... Masterpiece! What the hell happens in the brains? PS Heck, I'll 'force' to write greetings for UM'ers Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bmk1245 Posted December 11, 2024 Author #58 Share Posted December 11, 2024 To add, she requests snooker to watch.... And you have to see it, before cue ball strike, she freezes, and starts to swing in rock chair after target ball falls into the pocket.... To add, if you install cameras, cover every shiny LEDs with dark tape, same for TV/cable box LEDs... Learned that hard way, mom ripped all cables with 'chant' "Why is it shining, why is it shining, why is it shining., why is it shining., why is it shining., why is it shining...." I want to die before reaching that point of insanity.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+joc Posted December 15, 2024 #59 Share Posted December 15, 2024 On 11/14/2024 at 9:07 AM, bmk1245 said: Holy crap... She was so overwhelmed with the fight with TV set cables, she already went to sleep, ain't 17:00 (5:00pm) yet... Anyway, wake up call at 18:00 (6:00pm), food and pills and more puzzles and snooker, old hag.... Pills... I'm not asking what she takes...I can tell you though that sometimes pills can either actually be the problem or accentuate the problem. Especially heart pills. Some heart pills will cause you to virtually lose your mind...extreme short term memory loss, confusion, and other Alzheimer's symptoms. One wouldn't think that heart pressure medication can mess with your mind...but some can and do. Just sayin'. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bmk1245 Posted December 20, 2024 Author #60 Share Posted December 20, 2024 On 12/16/2024 at 1:26 AM, joc said: Pills... I'm not asking what she takes...I can tell you though that sometimes pills can either actually be the problem or accentuate the problem. Especially heart pills. Some heart pills will cause you to virtually lose your mind...extreme short term memory loss, confusion, and other Alzheimer's symptoms. One wouldn't think that heart pressure medication can mess with your mind...but some can and do. Just sayin'. I do avoid to give her pills (bromazepam, quetiapine) unless she becomes overagitated, and nothing else works. Funny thing, she don't have headaches anymore with Alzheimers, and her elevated blood pressure - over 200/110 before, nowadays stays below 150/70 (more or less 'normal' for her age). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+joc Posted December 21, 2024 #61 Share Posted December 21, 2024 9 hours ago, bmk1245 said: I do avoid to give her pills (bromazepam, quetiapine) unless she becomes overagitated, and nothing else works. Funny thing, she don't have headaches anymore with Alzheimers, and her elevated blood pressure - over 200/110 before, nowadays stays below 150/70 (more or less 'normal' for her age). Blood pressure can actually cause dementia and blood pressure medicine can as well. I'm not trying to play doctor. I commend you for your steadfastness. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bmk1245 Posted December 21, 2024 Author #62 Share Posted December 21, 2024 2 hours ago, joc said: Blood pressure can actually cause dementia and blood pressure medicine can as well. I'm not trying to play doctor. I commend you for your steadfastness. I only follow what doctors prescribed, after all, those meds aren't over the counter... Anyway, like watching after kid with adult smarts and strength. In her almost 92, shes strong as hell, try to rip napkin from her grip ))) Walks ~1 mile (now cold outside) per day, plus allday shuffling from room to kitchen to another room (I'd say one mile plus). 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+joc Posted December 21, 2024 #63 Share Posted December 21, 2024 4 hours ago, bmk1245 said: I only follow what doctors prescribed, after all, those meds aren't over the counter... Anyway, like watching after kid with adult smarts and strength. In her almost 92, shes strong as hell, try to rip napkin from her grip ))) Walks ~1 mile (now cold outside) per day, plus allday shuffling from room to kitchen to another room (I'd say one mile plus). Hang in there bro!👍 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bmk1245 Posted December 25, 2024 Author #64 Share Posted December 25, 2024 'Forced' to write Christmas greeting card for sister's (her daughter) kid (other cards were for sister, her niece, and few more people) All writing and drawing she did by herself, though in two separate days, 'cause getting tired and agitated after writing. Not a single error! Guy in the drawing is a snowman))) 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bmk1245 Posted December 30, 2024 Author #65 Share Posted December 30, 2024 I'm more than often to ponder idea me being out, sister will get my flat, mother will be in old fun house, win win, I say. Just an idea to ponder... Anyway... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bmk1245 Posted January 4 Author #66 Share Posted January 4 She forgot her brother... Wonder, when her memory will deteriorate to the point she forgets her daughter and son... Though, she remembers many poems, can recite till get tired (10 minutes +/-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bmk1245 Posted January 5 Author #67 Share Posted January 5 Ferocity in her grating carrots is amazing! Had to stop her with "Easy, easy...." Toddler in adult suit, with all neurosis and psychosis, and physical strength... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+joc Posted January 5 #68 Share Posted January 5 17 minutes ago, bmk1245 said: Ferocity in her grating carrots is amazing! Had to stop her with "Easy, easy...." Toddler in adult suit, with all neurosis and psychosis, and physical strength... I feel for you bmk. I really do. Persevere! In the end...you will be stronger and better for having suffered through it.⭐ You get a Gold Star for your heroism,!👍 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bmk1245 Posted January 5 Author #69 Share Posted January 5 5 hours ago, joc said: I feel for you bmk. I really do. Persevere! In the end...you will be stronger and better for having suffered through it.⭐ You get a Gold Star for your heroism,!👍 'Cmon, its not heroism. Heroism is looking after disabled kid through his whole life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+joc Posted January 6 #70 Share Posted January 6 6 hours ago, bmk1245 said: 'Cmon, its not heroism. Heroism is looking after disabled kid through his whole life. Matter of perspective I suppose. I think that people who do what they have to do to help other people, even if it's their own people, and put their own lives on hold to do it are heros. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dream jo Posted January 8 #71 Share Posted January 8 Mom had dementia before she went in to a care home the dementia tantrum was like living on egg shells it could be the moods could go on 24/7 for a month and social service could be useless like most times useless no body told us about dementia fits they could have coz mom had a few she died in 2021 because of this evil illness I loss a lot of time with her in 2020 coz of lockdown coved rules 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bmk1245 Posted January 17 Author #72 Share Posted January 17 (edited) Well, things get funnier... She cursing herself now with words sailors would blush... My mistake was with "don't say that, its not nice, relax"... Its like with toddler in the mall "I wanna toy!!!" tantrums. For few days, already, I say nothing, or just with response "OK", "Don't care", "Seventeen", she fumes out in max 30mins, then she calms down. More nicer you are trying to talk to her, more agitated she becomes... PS I talked for hours with my sister and we came to the conclusion - our mum is (and was) psychological vampire... Feeds on negative emotions, needs drama and pain (masochism (?), kinda). Once you don't pay much attention to her tantrums, she fumes out. PPS even bromazepam don't work, while being "knocked out", still slurs "I'm ****, I'm ******** idiot, I'm ******** prostitūte" etc Anyway, when you get used to it, its... How to say it... Easy?... PPPS folks, pay attention to your mental health, otherwise (see above)... Edited January 17 by Saru Removed profanity 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+joc Posted January 18 #73 Share Posted January 18 13 hours ago, bmk1245 said: pay attention to your mental health, otherwise (see above)... It's all relative. She isn't choosing to be that way. That's just the way she is. And it's probably the way she's always been. Character is set at a very early age, and it's arguable that it is even set before birth. We do make choices in our lives. But some people just repeatedly make bad choices. And in the end...we may or may not lose our minds. Nothing in life is guaranteed. I'm glad you are able to take a more chill attitude about it all! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dream jo Posted Thursday at 01:14 PM #74 Share Posted Thursday at 01:14 PM If only a diary on my mum's behaviour the dementia a people a court of helped other people because we else a friend of mine so the same neighbour a friend of mine so the same thing she could die on her mother's behave the dementia a papers I've said devil's illness dementia Alzheimer's it's still my mom's life it's still my it's still in my mum's life did I miss my mum but I want Mr dementia part but I do not miss the dementia part but my mum I'm terribly 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bmk1245 Posted Thursday at 08:47 PM Author #75 Share Posted Thursday at 08:47 PM 6 hours ago, dream jo said: If only a diary on my mum's behaviour the dementia a people a court of helped other people because we else a friend of mine so the same neighbour a friend of mine so the same thing she could die on her mother's behave the dementia a papers I've said devil's illness dementia Alzheimer's it's still my mom's life it's still my it's still in my mum's life did I miss my mum but I want Mr dementia part but I do not miss the dementia part but my mum I'm terribly I hope your relations with your mum were good. Mine with mine... not so much... For more than 30 years I distanced (tried) from her... Despotic woman with 'God complex', 'Goody two shoes', relations wrecker, person who shoves "good" down your throat (like it or not)... Anyway, regression is progressing... Whole day she was roaming rooms without problems (plus walking half mile in the morning), ripped paper with "I'm at work, will return at 18:00", made a mess in the kitchen (don't worry, gas pipes are closed), and just I came to her... "I can't walk" "I will have to walk on fours". Yet, walks to the fridge with usual rant on the loop "My sun is hungry, his fridge is empty, I have something to eat...." Oh boy, what tantrums tomorrow will bring... PS will try tomorrow "Neighbor stole your docs" schtick just to drive her attention from the fridge and food. She "remembers" that neighbor "stole" her "important documents" (what docs, she doesn't remember)... Kinda funny, confrontation with the neighbor over garbage in the past (mum used to leave garbage bags between the floors) turned into "He stole" .... .... Pampers ain't needed yet, but... soon... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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