John Palifox Key "Proofs of my Return"

[PUCK]

:D

GREAT POST, PUCK. WRONG BUT VERY COMICALLY STATED.

VERY WRONG, BUT VERY FUNNY.

If you follow the Joey people around in enough webplaces, you can read their mantra over and over again:

"There is no Joey but The Joey, and only Joey is The Joey because there is no other Joey but The Joey and only Joey can be The Joey forever and evermore world without end."

BUT NEVER FORGET THAT YOU ARE WRONG AND THAT THERE IS NOTHING FICTIONAL ABOUT JOEY, KEY, PAULA, MNI, THE OTHER REALM OR ANYTHING ELSE HERE

Please understand I am not trying to start an argument but on the question of the chorus, have you read it in the original Greek? I know a Joey type who sleeps in a cardboard box behind the A&P supermarket and lives off the medical waste the hospital throws out so of course he is a Greek scholar with an olympic quality physique, fluent in French and is currently writing an appendix to the Kama Sutra and he insist he has translated it correctly.

I concede his last two remaining teeth are arranged in such a way as to produce a strange whistling sound every time he makes the sound of an 's' but I can still understand him well enough to be sure I have recorded his translation correctly.

As for the reality of all of this, I never doubted it. Would someone post it to an unexplained mysteries site if it weren't true? I can't image such a thing. For what godly reason? What would they have to gain by lieing?

My question had to do with the character Joey. I'm sure the error is on my part. I'm sure the answer is right there in front of me but I read and read and still cannot find 'What did Joey do that qualified him to be thought of as existing on a higher plane than Gollum or my friend Dogg who lives on medical waste?' I keep missing that part.

And that 'nothing can come out' part. I find that fascinating. We can go there and the serpent man captured by our worldwalkers in France and the gnomes slaughtered by Canadian farmers indicate they can pass through to our side, but plants, soil, and even water when brought back through a portal all turn to a grey dust !!! What about gas? If I go over there for twenty minutes will the 2AR air in my lungs turn to dust? Will my chest suddenly collapse as I drop to my knees coughing and hacking up grey slime when a lungful of gas turns into a teaspoon of dust? How about the oxygen that has been passed into my blood or now resides in my individual cells? Will all that turn to dust? How will this affect my health? Does 2AR cause cancer?

And one final question. Pertaining to Joey's level of intelligence. Wasn't he hanging out with this super-cool remote viewer once? I have this picture of him typing away on his keyboard when one of his groupies enters and announces "My girlfriend has just remote-viewd three alien bases within five miles of us, the current location of the ark of the covenant, the hiding place of the Holy Grail and the graves of Jimmy Hoffa and Judge Carter"

Joey, of course, responds to this by telling her to be quiet. He is busy writing to a paranormal web site to ask if it's members could help him locate JPK or the 'proofs of my return' book. Hmmmm. Does it seem like someone of superior intelligence has missed an obvious connection? Ah, another mystery. But then, Joey is supose to be a mysterious character, no?

So, nothing to do but wait for the next chapter. The suspense is too much. Will Joey pin a new medal on himself for having reached a perfected state of humility? Will Dastardly Diane refuse to ignore the silly little man behind the curtain? Will Precious Paula continue to lead her army of web warriors on nightly patrols to keep the Michigan portal chaste? Tune in next week, same time, same web site. Fade to black....commercial.

Edited February 4, 2007 by PUCK

[Fluffybunny]

Another internet snipe hunt...I had hoped this had faded away where it belongs...I just can't decide if it should go into the writers and artists hangout...I will have to give it an A for creativity...

[Reepa]

Is this still going, probably divies like me who keep it up here.

Remember people saying we've got the book about a year ago when I was last on and then saying they would say whats in it, sad or what

[Alpgal04]

Hostes alienigeni me abduxerunt. Qui annus est?

ODE TO THREE INFAMOUS LETTERS

A well placed question was all it took,

To ready the line and bait the hook.

It bedazzled the mind and the senses back then,

Nothing quite like it's been written again.

First Tim, then apache, the hotshot, the shrink,

Then the smartblonde, the hippie, and that little ratfink.

It twisted and turned every step of the way,

With Badsummer, Gargadennec, and Diane Decay.

Micronational soldiers with small wooden swords,

Knife weilding midgets, strippers, and whores.

There were towers of rubble, an old French chateau,

Ancient keepers of time, someone missing a toe.

Fairy Tale fungi, and an unpleasant drink,

Will take you to the very brink.

The shadowlands surround us all,

With cavernous skies and impenetrable walls.

No incantation to chant, and no magic you'll need,

To enter the realm that should not be.

Land of ravenous gnomes that aren't a bit shy,

And reptillian creatures with intelligent eyes.

Pearls before swine, it was often called,

Those sparks of sheer genius, bewitching them all.

Though more should be said, there's no need to go on,

For what once was adored, then abhored, is now gone. *

*((( But for those who know better, there are but a few,

The handful aware of things hidden from view,

Obfuscation yet reigns, while we stay remote,

Like silent observers in a great Belloc quote.

Ever watchful, ubiquitous, with the best of intent,

We will meet again, and it will be an event.

There's still much to be done, need I say more?

So, cheers from the land of grand elk and Tuebor!))) *

White vans, Black Dogs, Loic's funny hat -

Dat beeins allz i gostas sez boat awel tat!

SO THERE!!!!!!

Lapgal

E pur si muove

[BishopRyan]

Myself and another member here fabricated the story about finding the book to draw out the people who said they had posession of it by conning them to agree that there were certain things that only people "in the know" or had the book would know about. Basically a few so called owners of the book confirmed complete and fabricated information as being legit. lol they even attempted to name drop names that we fabricated on other sites to further imbelish the shame of a story. It was pretty easy and this whole story is a load of garbage. We trolled the original trollers here and got the info we wanted out of them.

Not only did we confirm that its all garbage but we found it mildly entertaining.

I admit it was a great story when I first stumbled upon it.

[Ball Lightning]

I had not heard about this, and will therefore start some serious web searching etc. Sounds very interesting indeed!

[Irish]

Myself and another member here fabricated the story about finding the book to draw out the people who said they had posession of it by conning them to agree that there were certain things that only people "in the know" or had the book would know about. Basically a few so called owners of the book confirmed complete and fabricated information as being legit. lol they even attempted to name drop names that we fabricated on other sites to further imbelish the shame of a story. It was pretty easy and this whole story is a load of garbage. We trolled the original trollers here and got the info we wanted out of them.

Not only did we confirm that its all garbage but we found it mildly entertaining.

I admit it was a great story when I first stumbled upon it.

With that in mind, I think its time to put this one to sleep for good.