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Raiding the Icebox


Thanato

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Raiding the Icebox: Secret Canadian and American plans to invade each other

American Invasion:

Invading Canada won't be like invading Iraq: When we invade Canada, nobody will be able to grumble that we didn't have a plan.

The United States government does have a plan to invade Canada. It's a 94-page document called "Joint Army and Navy Basic War Plan -- Red," with the word SECRET stamped on the cover. It's a bold plan, a bodacious plan, a step-by-step plan to invade, seize and annex our neighbor to the north. It goes like this:

First, we send a joint Army-Navy overseas force to capture the port city of Halifax, cutting the Canadians off from their British allies.

Then we seize Canadian power plants near Niagara Falls, so they freeze in the dark...

Canadian Invasion:

As it turns out, Katz isn't the first Canadian to speculate on how to fight the U.S.A. In fact, Canadian military strategists developed a plan to invade the United States in 1921 -- nine years before their American counterparts created War Plan Red.

The Canadian plan was developed by the country's director of military operations and intelligence, a World War I hero named James Sutherland "Buster" Brown. Apparently Buster believed that the best defense was a good offense: His "Defence Scheme No. 1" called for Canadian soldiers to invade the United States, charging toward Albany, Minneapolis, Seattle and Great Falls, Mont., at the first signs of a possible U.S. invasion...

Source

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Its a funny artical, and Remember Napoleon's invasion of Russia?

~Thanato

Edited by Thanato
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I'm pretty sure we have plans to invade a lot of countries just to make sure. I'm talking about the basic invasion.

So... Canada wants to invade us? Hmm... I'm 300 (or so) miles from border so I'll see you guys pretty soon then. :P

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shouldnt be too hard, just capture the road, only one road in Canada. :P

j/k

(ref. South Park)

Edited by PadawanOsswe
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I have said this before...Canadian confidence cannot be shaken :D

President George Bush was in the Oval Office wondering which country to invade next, when his telephone rang.

"Hallo, President Bush" a heavily accented voice said. This is Archie, up 'ere at the Harp Seal Pub in Badger's Cove, Newfoundland,Canada eh?

I am callin' to tells ya dat we are officially declaring war on you eh!"

"Well Archie," George replied, "This is indeed important news! How big is your army?"

"Right now," said Archie, after a moments calculation "there is myself, me cousin Harold, me next-door-neighbor Mick, and the whole dart team from the pub. That makes eight!"

George paused. "I must tell you Archie, that I have one million men in my army waiting to move on my command."

"Holy jeez," said Archie. "I'll have ta call ya back!"

Sure enough, the next day, Archie called again. "Mr. Bush, the war is still on! We have managed to acquire some infantry equipment!"

"And what equipment would that be Archie?", George asked.

"Well sir, we have two combines, a bulldozer, and Harry's farm tractor."

President Bush sighed. "I must tell you Archie, that I have 16,000 tanks and 14,000 armoured personnel carriers. Also I've increased my army to one and a half million since we last spoke."

"Lord T'underin' Jaysus, bye", said Archie, "I'll be getting back to ya."

Sure enough, Archie rang again the next day. "President Bush, the war is still on! We have managed to git ourselves airborne! We up an' modified Harrigan's ultra-light wit a couple of shotguns in the cockpit, and four byes from the Legion have joined us as well!"

George was silent for a minute then cleared his throat. "I must tell you Archie that I have 10,000 bombers and 20,000 fighter planes. My military complex is surrounded by laser-guided, surface-to-air missile sites. And since we last spoke, I've increased my army to TWO MILLION!"

"Jeysus, Mary and Joseph," said Archie,"I'll have ta call youse back."

Sure enough, Archie called again the next day. "President Bush! I am sorry to have to tell you dat we have had to call off dis'ere war."

"I'm sorry to hear that" said George. "Why the sudden change of heart?"

"Well, sir," said Archie, "we've all sat ourselves down and had a long chat over a bunch of pints, and come to realize dat dere's no way we can feed two million prisoners."

CANADIAN CONFIDENCE CANNOT BE SHAKEN! --- LUV those NEWFIES

Edited by Daughter of the Nine Moons
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Always thought that Canada should just annex Washington, Oregon and Idaho. X)

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CANADIAN CONFIDENCE CANNOT BE SHAKEN! --- LUV those NEWFIES

ehehe didn't see the punchline coming, nice joke:)

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lol that was a good one Dot9.

Got a plan for everything, good and bad... we're Batman!

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Always thought that Canada should just annex Washington, Oregon and Idaho. X)

Pft, who wants Idaho?

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Sorry to be a spoil-sport, but these plans are about 70 years old. Coming from the time of the start of World War II. When there was a fear that the UK could fall to the German Army. And that part of the surrender doccument could be a surrender of Canada, who had declared war on Hitler along with England.

This was part of the old Color Plans. With each country given a color designation. The UK and the colonies and domminions were Red, Japan was Orange, ect. Why this was called War Plan Red.

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The War plan was to invade Canada (Crimson), and to prevent Britain (red) from coming to the rescue. Hell the US's largest training War Game was about the Invasion of Canada ;)

The Canadian Plan was about buying time for Britain to Come in and help out, it was about slowing down the Yanks long enough for Both the Brits and Winter to set in, because i dout the Yanks would of liked fighting in a fearce and Cold Canadian Winter, were i live theres a temperature Range of 60-70 degrees in a year.

So these were real plans, weather or not they have been updated since the 20s, and 30s is another question.

Also these plans were before WW2, the Canadian one was just after WW1, and the American one was in the early 30s, before Hitler had consoldiated his power in Germany.

~Thanato

Edited by Thanato
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I volunteer to be a guard at the Mountie POW camp! :D

(Okay, okay, I know they don't REALLY look like that. :cry: But I can DREAM, right? :lol:)

Anyway, you guys haven't seen the *updated* plans. ;) Okay, here's a hint . . . .

it involves Richard Simmons and LOTS of sparkly spandex. :devil::w00t:

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it involves Richard Simmons and LOTS of sparkly spandex. :devil::w00t:

Oh, alright. Evidently Newfoundland is the prime target. :)

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Pft, who wants Idaho?

because of the POTATOES! :D

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because of the POTATOES! :D

The seed potatoes of which are actually grown in British Columbia, Canada. :lol:

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especially the potatoes of Idaho! :tu:

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Yes, it's true...and another thread was just started about it this week (you may want to try searching before posting a subject). The plans are well over a hundred years old and just makes for a good read now a days.

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Yes, it's true...and another thread was just started about it this week (you may want to try searching before posting a subject). The plans are well over a hundred years old and just makes for a good read now a days.

I say, bring it on!!! we canucks would have no problem effortlessly smiting all takers. seriously though...creepy that such a plan exists.

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It's not really suprising. The US wanted to cover it's bases and make sure all angles are thought of, that's all.

I'd be pretty suprised if these little files didn't exist in a variety of different countries.

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Merged topics

Edited by Daughter of the Nine Moons
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