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Some anagrams


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Virginia Bottomley - I'm an evil Tory bigot

Michael Heseltine - Elect him, he's alien

David Mellor - Dildo marvel

The Houses of Parliament - Loonies far up the Thames

Francois Mitterand - Mad strain of cretin

Performance related pay - Mere end of year claptrap

Dame Agatha Christie - I am a right death case

The Open University - Intrusive Neophyte

The Metropolitan Police Force - I'm fellatio, the erect porno cop

Acorn Computers - Crap to consumer

Benson and Hedges - NHS been a godsend

Eastenders - needs a rest

Home and Away - Aha..yawn mode

Eldorado - Real dodo

Selina Scott - Elastic snot

Peter Ustinov - Eruptive snot

Actors - scrota

Robert DeNiro - error on bidet

Rita Hayworth - Hot hairy wart

Sir Alec Guinness - Clearing sinuses

Mel Gibson - big melons

Arnold Schwarzenegger - He's grown large 'n' crazed

Kylie Minogue - I like 'em young

Gloria Estefan - large fat noise

Chris Rea - rich ****

Marti Pellow - Ill tapeworm

Madonna, the material girl - Real dim man-eating harlot

Ossie Ardiles - **** is soiled

Diego Maradona - O dear, I'm a gonad

Martina Navratilova -Variant rival to a man

Gabriela Sabatini - Insatiable airbag

Irritable Bowel Syndrome - O my terrible drains below

Boddingtons, the cream of Manchester - Boddington's stomach ache fermenter

Stella Artois, reassuringly expensive - Pint 'o' lager virtually erases sexiness

An Intel Pentium Processor - Customer nipple not arisen

Pentium Processor - Computerises porn

Funeral - real fun

Christians -rich saints

Women Priests - new imposters

David Ginolla - Vaginal Dildo

and finally.........

Motorway Service Station - I eat coronary vomit stews

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